A P1999 Christmas Story

YendorLootmonkey · #1 12-16-2010, 07:01 PM

Against my better judgment, I am posting this here even though it'll probably just turn into a huge flamefest somehow even though that is totally opposite from the point I am trying to make!!!!!!! SO MERRY CHRISTMAS AND WHATNOT!!!

The following is based on a true story occurring earlier this week.

A P99 CHRISTMAS STORY
by Yendor Lootmonkey

Twas the week before Christmas, when all throughout Hate
All the creatures were stirring, Brye couldn't wait!
Vesica Dei ported up first and started buffing with care,
Because Dozekar and TMO would soon would be there.

My guildmates were giving up quality time in their beds,
While visions of phat planar lewts danced in their heads.
And Jenni with her whip, and me with my blades,
Had just equipped our weapons for a long late-night raid.

When during the battle there arose such a clatter,
I looked at my chat window to see what was the matter.
Away a spite golem gated, back to its Ampitheater friends,
Summoning us one by one so we could all meet our ends.

I ran around madly, hiding behind women like a hero,
Trying in vain to keep my hit points from reaching zero.
When, what to my wondering eyes should I spy,
The entire The Mystical Order guild was watching us die.

Those magic-resistant spite golems were all very fast,
I knew in a moment the time to camp out had long past.
More rapid than Selo's, their summons they came,
We all stood and died as they called us by name!

"Now Nocte! Now, Teeroy! Now, Truegem and Jen!
On, Defcon! On, Hassel! On, Delicate and Yen!
Die at my feet! You shall not evade us at all!
Watch your raid wipe as all your gimpy bodies fall!"

Wiping in front of our rivals was embarrassing as shit,
With us out of the way, the more mobs they could get.
Back to the spires we scrambled, preparing for the fight,
To begin the corpse retrieval that would surely take all night.

And then, in a twinkling, I read in our guild chat
One of our clerics had been rezzed... now fancy that!
Now we must admit that we are not a TMO-lover,
But they came to our rescue, and helped us recover!

We rezzed in and re-buffed ourselves just off to the side,
While The Mystical Order continued pulling, taking it in stride.
To their puller I sent a tell, politely asking if it was okay,
For us to move back to Church, without interrupting their play.

"It's cool bro, I'll wait," came Beovvulf's friendly reply,
Never expected him to be such a courteous guy.
Thanking them for the help, back to Church we did dash,
Where Narninate had returned from a well-timed crash.

Even Jenni was still awake, which was unusual, I know,
We typically have to leave her behind when it's time to go.
Would we do the same, if in front of us they had died?
I would like to think we would, instead of standing aside.

We don't always agree, and we are often quick to blame,
And some shit guilds do to each other is pretty damn lame.
But think of how much more fun this game could possibly be,
If we all helped each other out to a certain degree.

We went back to pulling, and for the rest of the raid,
There were no insults in /ooc, or shitty comments made.
We all exclaimed, after there were no more mobs in sight,
"Happy Christmas to all, and to all a good-night!"