West side of Antonica

[jakerees]

Yes that is true that it is time to discuss the area from Qeynos to the high pass and from Permafrost down to the Rathe region as I am not sure how much attention this vast region gets and I don't mean the overworked areas around paw or the giants of rathe or even the giants of ice but I know in my first travels to this region was by way of the high pass and it always made me feel like I was walking slower after I entered into the eastern plains of karana and came down the mountain but I'm sure it was always just an optical illusion caused by the openness of this region compared to the east as you travel through the commonlands and kithicor forest. As an aside it should be noted that optical illusion is being used in the scientific way and not as a slang term to refer to genitalia as it is often used here but I believe we all can agree that the necessity exists to distinguish between the two. I marvel that there exists in this world the half horse half man creature of the karanas and it would of course be nice if they existed as a playable race but alas as the old live everquest went downhill and decided to introduce cat people and then frog people they ignored the overwhelming demand to be able to play as horse people. Also to play as elephants. And so we find ourselves dodging cyclops in the karanas and we can even roleplay to our hearts desire at one of the many farms that dot these lands that we have gone the way of Cincinnatus and thrown down our weapons and our leadership and return to a simpler life. I know I have found myself equipping a shovel in my day and tending the fields, and have even taken to a farmer's daughter (or wife?) that I found in the farm house, much akin to your normal way of life in rural Kansas, or Nebraska as we again find that p99 can imitate real life so well.

I have to admit that I was somewhat disappointed in the Barbarian town of Halas and its lack of lively entertainment, not entertainment in general just lively entertainment, but it is a good place to rest before you make your way across the frozen tundra to the place that is called Permafrost. It has been said that the gateway to this dungeon home of ice goblins is guarded by giants made of ice, but alas I do not believe the tales as the only thing that greets me as I pass through these gates is a druid in the form of a dog that seems to be staring at nothing, or a pile of bones hovering above the ground, and it makes me sad that skeletons cannot just sit down like normal people and that they have to just collapse and disguise themselves as the cache of bones kept horded by a common junkyard dog, and sometimes I try to loot these bones but it just shows me items that a weak person might wear, much as if they were a common bum wandering the roads or railyards, and that of course leads you to draw parallels between trains at the railyards and trains in the land of Norrath, and the biggest similarity between them is that they both have a conductor who can ruin your life if they want to unless they just go ahead and let themselves die. The best part of your trip to the west region of Antonica however would have to be the isolation and serenity that is afforded from a visit to the large lake in the Rathe region as you can utilize a cabin tucked in to the mountains that surround the lake for peace and quiet and just remove yourself from your cares as you grab a canoe to traverse the lake for good fishing and perhaps go for a swim after removing your armor just like that time you spent at a summer camp in real life before it was interrupted by some hockey mask machete wielding freak and I assure you that it will not happen here unless I happen by in a dented brass mask with a trust 1hs weapon but I won't do that unless I do but you won't see it coming unless you do. Just don't do a / who while you are there to keep it a surprise. WTB Shaman Epic 6k

[Bardolap]

I couldn't make it past the first sentence.

In fact, I gave up before I found the end of the first sentence.

Could you rewrite this so that it makes sense?

[MiRo2]

As an aside it should be noted that optical illusion is being used in the scientific way and not as a slang term to refer to genitalia as it is often used here but I believe we all can agree that the necessity exists to distinguish between the two.

This is a thing?

[Nagoya]

Are we trying to play an online game here or just sharing our mental illness together in some kind of altar to madness?

English is not my native language and i can still assure you 100% that none of that post makes any kind of grammatical sense; it is a complete mess to read.

This is not poetry this is the closest version of /yell we have in real life.

May the force be with you fellow otaku.

[Canelek]

I think our friend here is on a bender.

Fly high, pal!

[rollin5k]

i totally agree OP

[fadetree]

I couldn't make it past the first sentence.

In fact, I gave up before I found the end of the first sentence.

Could you rewrite this so that it makes sense?

You miss the point entirely. It does make a kind of sideways sense. It's 'stream-of-consciousness' writing style and there are some jokes in there too. It's not bad. Here it is re-written-

'Yknow, I think that the whole western side of Antonica is kind of underused. I remember how huge it seemed when I first crossed down from high pass. I kind of feel nostalgic about it, and there's some stuff you don't see anywhere else, like the ice giants and the centaurs. They were obviously shooting for a kind of 'great plains' idea and they hit it pretty closely. Although, Halas is kind of boring and as far as the ice giants go, all I ever see is a necro or druid waiting for the next one to spawn. The Rathetear lake region is pretty cool too, but you really never see anyone down there. It's just sad that all these areas get so underused. Oh well. I'd really like my shaman epic but I'm poor.'

See? that's boring compared.

[Muggens]

I fuckin love these jakerees travellers tales around antonica - best eq scribbler atm 5 stars

[Evia]

Western Antonica is pretty great for all the reasons mentioned in this thread.

[skarlorn]

I fuckin love these jakerees travellers tales around antonica - best eq scribbler atm 5 stars

This 1 is electrifying

[SamwiseRed]

Yes that is true that it is time to discuss the area from Qeynos to the high pass and from Permafrost down to the Rathe region as I am not sure how much attention this vast region gets and I don't mean the overworked areas around paw or the giants of rathe or even the giants of ice but I know in my first travels to this region was by way of the high pass and it always made me feel like I was walking slower after I entered into the eastern plains of karana and came down the mountain but I'm sure it was always just an optical illusion caused by the openness of this region compared to the east as you travel through the commonlands and kithicor forest. As an aside it should be noted that optical illusion is being used in the scientific way and not as a slang term to refer to genitalia as it is often used here but I believe we all can agree that the necessity exists to distinguish between the two. I marvel that there exists in this world the half horse half man creature of the karanas and it would of course be nice if they existed as a playable race but alas as the old live everquest went downhill and decided to introduce cat people and then frog people they ignored the overwhelming demand to be able to play as horse people. Also to play as elephants. And so we find ourselves dodging cyclops in the karanas and we can even roleplay to our hearts desire at one of the many farms that dot these lands that we have gone the way of Cincinnatus and thrown down our weapons and our leadership and return to a simpler life. I know I have found myself equipping a shovel in my day and tending the fields, and have even taken to a farmer's daughter (or wife?) that I found in the farm house, much akin to your normal way of life in rural Kansas, or Nebraska as we again find that p99 can imitate real life so well.

I have to admit that I was somewhat disappointed in the Barbarian town of Halas and its lack of lively entertainment, not entertainment in general just lively entertainment, but it is a good place to rest before you make your way across the frozen tundra to the place that is called Permafrost. It has been said that the gateway to this dungeon home of ice goblins is guarded by giants made of ice, but alas I do not believe the tales as the only thing that greets me as I pass through these gates is a druid in the form of a dog that seems to be staring at nothing, or a pile of bones hovering above the ground, and it makes me sad that skeletons cannot just sit down like normal people and that they have to just collapse and disguise themselves as the cache of bones kept horded by a common junkyard dog, and sometimes I try to loot these bones but it just shows me items that a weak person might wear, much as if they were a common bum wandering the roads or railyards, and that of course leads you to draw parallels between trains at the railyards and trains in the land of Norrath, and the biggest similarity between them is that they both have a conductor who can ruin your life if they want to unless they just go ahead and let themselves die. The best part of your trip to the west region of Antonica however would have to be the isolation and serenity that is afforded from a visit to the large lake in the Rathe region as you can utilize a cabin tucked in to the mountains that surround the lake for peace and quiet and just remove yourself from your cares as you grab a canoe to traverse the lake for good fishing and perhaps go for a swim after removing your armor just like that time you spent at a summer camp in real life before it was interrupted by some hockey mask machete wielding freak and I assure you that it will not happen here unless I happen by in a dented brass mask with a trust 1hs weapon but I won't do that unless I do but you won't see it coming unless you do. Just don't do a / who while you are there to keep it a surprise. WTB Shaman Epic 6k

drugs?

[skarlorn]

Contrary to popular opinion, I believe jakerees is not under the influence of heavy drugs. More likely coffee and a little herb than anything. These sacred texts are directly linked to the will of the Retarded God and are deep plunges into Jake's mental network of subconscious connection and object association.

[fadetree]

It's true, he may the next Avatar of Retardation. We'll have to see. But there is actual wisdom in his raving, so he'll have to get rid of that before ascending.

[Casteel]

OP used the words, "farmer's daughter" and "genitalia" -- instantly garnering 5 stars.

[Evia]

The more I think on this post the more brilliant it becomes. This shit is total classic! Kinda reminds me of sk8ter gnome!

[skarlorn]

It has been said that the gateway to this dungeon home of ice goblins is guarded by giants made of ice, but alas I do not believe the tales as the only thing that greets me as I pass through these gates is a druid in the form of a dog that seems to be staring at nothing, or a pile of bones hovering above the ground,

very very poignant shit

[SunDrake]

I also loved this. I have never given a post any stars and I 5 star'd it. If you can't decipher variations on the English language, that's more of a you problem than an OP problem. ;)

[Scoojitsu]

I like it. :) There is more?

[One Tin Soldier]

I know I have found myself equipping a shovel in my day and tending the fields................much akin to your normal way of life in rural Kansas, or Nebraska as we again find that p99 can imitate real life so well.

Maybe it's akin to real life if the shovel has an air conditioned cab and costs a quarter million dollars.

[spoof2424]

and as diplomatic as dented brass masks have become since friday the 13th happened in 2017 2018 has new snacks we have yet to see.

Quite the chip on you about western antonica. explore moar!

[CyricTheMad420]

OP is gold and if you couldn't read it or make sense of what you read that's kind of sad lol

[skarlorn]

I like it. :) There is more?

There is more, you just need to view posts by jakerees and stalk him across all the threads he has been on

[jakerees]

https://imgur.com/FdfUhsS.jpeg

[Whirled]

dude, next time chuck your text in this
https://www.grammarly.com/
it may help a bit

[fadetree]

As many do, you've missed the point.

[skarlorn]

As many do, you've missed the point.

what a pleb, undeserving of jakerees textwalls

[maskedmelon]

how often you do these sorts brainstorms/free writes and does it help? i could see it helping with associations and ideas by extension ^^

[EpicAdventure]

ive never been west of North Karana sry. Also the price is 80k

[fadetree]

^ lol wins thread

[jakerees]

You must all come see this magical land! Take this wonder for example: The Floating Tree of the Rathe Mountains!

https://imgur.com/7Sj81N4.jpg

[skarlorn]

God bless you Vacker

[Arakash]

"A dog that seems to be staring at nothing."

That is a very nice line and sort of encapsulates my entire EQ experience since I first logged on to the game 18 or so years ago.

[ldgmo868]

Also to play as elephants.

same

[skarlorn]

Rivervale qualifies as west antonica and I formally invite Vacker to eat whatever or whomever he wants. This is the highest honor imaginable

[ldgmo]

Rivervale qualifies as west antonica and I formally invite Vacker to eat whatever or whomever he wants. This is the highest honor imaginable

WHAT IF HE WANTS TO EAT THE MAYOR?!

[bluntfang]

ARE YOU KIDDING ME DUDE? THE MAYOR?

[fadetree]

He could make Mayornaisse out of him, he's all fatty.

[d3r14k]

He could make Mayornaisse out of him, he's all fatty.

[Jazzy]

Yes that is true that it is time to discuss the area from Qeynos to the high pass and from Permafrost down to the Rathe region as I am not sure how much attention this vast region gets and I don't mean the overworked areas around paw or the giants of rathe or even the giants of ice but I know in my first travels to this region was by way of the high pass and it always made me feel like I was walking slower after I entered into the eastern plains of karana and came down the mountain but I'm sure it was always just an optical illusion caused by the openness of this region compared to the east as you travel through the commonlands and kithicor forest. As an aside it should be noted that optical illusion is being used in the scientific way and not as a slang term to refer to genitalia as it is often used here but I believe we all can agree that the necessity exists to distinguish between the two. I marvel that there exists in this world the half horse half man creature of the karanas and it would of course be nice if they existed as a playable race but alas as the old live everquest went downhill and decided to introduce cat people and then frog people they ignored the overwhelming demand to be able to play as horse people. Also to play as elephants. And so we find ourselves dodging cyclops in the karanas and we can even roleplay to our hearts desire at one of the many farms that dot these lands that we have gone the way of Cincinnatus and thrown down our weapons and our leadership and return to a simpler life. I know I have found myself equipping a shovel in my day and tending the fields, and have even taken to a farmer's daughter (or wife?) that I found in the farm house, much akin to your normal way of life in rural Kansas, or Nebraska as we again find that p99 can imitate real life so well.

I have to admit that I was somewhat disappointed in the Barbarian town of Halas and its lack of lively entertainment, not entertainment in general just lively entertainment, but it is a good place to rest before you make your way across the frozen tundra to the place that is called Permafrost. It has been said that the gateway to this dungeon home of ice goblins is guarded by giants made of ice, but alas I do not believe the tales as the only thing that greets me as I pass through these gates is a druid in the form of a dog that seems to be staring at nothing, or a pile of bones hovering above the ground, and it makes me sad that skeletons cannot just sit down like normal people and that they have to just collapse and disguise themselves as the cache of bones kept horded by a common junkyard dog, and sometimes I try to loot these bones but it just shows me items that a weak person might wear, much as if they were a common bum wandering the roads or railyards, and that of course leads you to draw parallels between trains at the railyards and trains in the land of Norrath, and the biggest similarity between them is that they both have a conductor who can ruin your life if they want to unless they just go ahead and let themselves die. The best part of your trip to the west region of Antonica however would have to be the isolation and serenity that is afforded from a visit to the large lake in the Rathe region as you can utilize a cabin tucked in to the mountains that surround the lake for peace and quiet and just remove yourself from your cares as you grab a canoe to traverse the lake for good fishing and perhaps go for a swim after removing your armor just like that time you spent at a summer camp in real life before it was interrupted by some hockey mask machete wielding freak and I assure you that it will not happen here unless I happen by in a dented brass mask with a trust 1hs weapon but I won't do that unless I do but you won't see it coming unless you do. Just don't do a / who while you are there to keep it a surprise. WTB Shaman Epic 6k


Well said

[Diogene]

A+ post. Usually good writers are able to spot sensible forgotten details about the world around us, and you sir, are doing exactly the same with Norrath. Funny and refreshing !

I like the style very much. A mix between James Joyce for the continuous stream & Easton Ellis for the cold desabused sense of humor fuelled by some serious Nerdery.

Would read again