Pooping at work

[eqholmes]

I love coffee and pretty much on schedule every day I got to poop at work. This seems like it must be a common occurrence to people. I hate Hate HATE public restrooms, so my question is how many seat covers or layers of toilet paper do you put down to protect yourself from others ass germs. Also make sure to toss some TP in the water, don’t want that back splash to hit you in the taint/hole/balls!!!! Ya you know what I'm talking about, that cold ass water striking you and making you cringe

Edit* fixed a bit of spelling

[L2Phantom]

What would inspire you to make a thread for this? Just curious, really.

[eqholmes]

Because like clockwork I just went at my normal time and there were no seat covers, i normally use 3. In other words I'm bored at work :) so back to the question, how many do you use?

[Eldormanix]

lol. it must sucks to have to go poo everyday at work especially when they all know what you are gonna do when you stand up of your chair... if you are on a chair ...... anyways the best trick is TO NOT work AT all do like me and sell drugs in the street so you can stay at home and POO At home anytime and play EQ all the time

[Simplistik]

I see bad days coming in the future simply by the post and responses thus far.

[Jeebus]

I used to love to poop at work when I was the only one there. Nothing better than getting paid to poo (well there are some things better....)

[eqholmes]

What sucks is when the bathroom is non-gender and you take a huge pile and when you come out there is a chick waiting to go. Then from that point she is going to associate that smell and your face. If its a fat chick i just smile and keep on walking without a worry :)

[Derazor]

I never use covers. Typically, there are more germs in other places I'm more worried about. I really dont care about germs on my butt cheeks.

[Skope]

My suggestion would be to train those leg muscles for the McFloatiepants poo. If it takes you longer than a couple of minutes it can get quite tiresome.

[Senadin]

I never use covers. Typically, there are more germs in other places I'm more worried about. I really dont care about germs on my butt cheeks.

So true, there's more germs on the sink and tap as well as the door handle or the towel dispenser... (well you get the idea) than on the actual seat....

[eqdruid76]

Two words.

Upper decker.

[hyzon]

I think I was traumatized from when I went to a public bathroom as a kid, and the wall said, "No use standing on the seat; crabs in here jump 15 feet."

I ran out all upset, and my Dad laughed his ass off at me.

I still avoid pooping in public at all costs =P

[President]

Come into work. Log in to phone. Drink cup of tea. Go take giant dump.

40 minutes later, start working.

[eqholmes]

Come into work. Log in to phone. Drink cup of tea. Go take giant dump.

40 minutes later, start working.

I like the cut of your jib, thats how I usually start out the day, the first hour I'm 70% asleep, to many times to count has that backsplash been whats woken me up. The whole seat cover thing for me though is the idea that people piss all over the seat cover and to think that im sitting on someones piss bothers me. As far as the sink and door handle to the bath room, use paper towels to open them or wait for some other poor sob to open it and slide on out.

[Desert]

I'm fortunate enough to work in a building that has a cleaning staff that is on point, no covers and no worries on my end. :D

[VictoryARC]

putting a wad of tp in the center of the water in the toilet prevents backsplash. it provides a nice platform for your load to float on. it also increases the smell in the bathroom. and yes, as a previous poster pointed out, the seat actually has less germs than the common toothbrush. coffee every day= projectile poo

[Aeolwind]

Piss is by and large sterile and contains ammonia. I generally wipe the excess pee off the seat & Plop down. The chances of you catching something off a seat that you cant see are really really low.

Best advice, run off a small amount of paper towel, wash hands, use towel to turn off water & run more towels off, dry hands, open door with towel, hold with foot, throw away towel, exit. Think about the number of people that have a blowthru that decide not to wash their hands and just exit...now that can get you sick.

Generally, this is when I get my most important text messages done. If its 8a-8p Sun-Wed, if you get a text from me, you can almost bet I'm poopin, unless we've been talking prior.

[Arkanjil]

Just cover the seat with toilet paper, sit down, and repeat the steps aeolwind already said :P

I don't know what it is about work or coffee...but I come in in the morning, have a cup of coffee and an hour or so later I'm busy poopin!

[President]

germaphobes...

I always hate it when I am in there during my morning poop, and in blasts a fat guy through the door(you can always tell because of the heavy breathing and the jurrasic park style stall shaking,) slams open the stall next to you, hurries to get his pants down and pummels the stall next to you like no other. Pretty much ruins my poo.

[Spud]

Gotta T.P. that seat yo

[hyzon]

Hep C lives in urine (and controversially Hep B), so not always sterile.

And yeah, if they don't have those it exits the body sterile, but almost immediately begins to be colonized.

I think I'm one of those people that would rather do the 2 extra mins of work every time to avoid the incredibly low chance of getting something gross. Because the shit you end up with isn't stuff you'd want.

To each his own though.

[mitic]

interesting thread

[brockgl]

You're OCD... It's been proven that public toilet seats are one of the cleanest surfaces you will come in contact with on a daily basis. Doorknobs, Money, Cleaning Supplies (like sponges and rags) are FAR more infested with harmful bacteria than a public toilet seat.

You're freaking out over nothing.

[Aarone]

You're OCD... It's been proven that public toilet seats are one of the cleanest surfaces you will come in contact with on a daily basis. Doorknobs, Money, Cleaning Supplies (like sponges and rags) are FAR more infested with harmful bacteria than a public toilet seat.

You're freaking out over nothing.

Mythbusters did a whole episode dedicated to this.

There is NOTHING like the satisfaction of a good poop, except the satisfaction of a good poop taken on company time. But what do I care about toilet covers and public bathrooms - my office has a can of its very own!

[hyzon]

Cleaner than things that don't generally get cleaned (ever) or at least on a daily basis, yes.

I understand the idea of fomites.

I don't understand why it gets peoples panties in a wad when other people like to be cleanly. It's not like I ask you to do any of the work, and I specifically ended my post with "To each his own."

You are welcome to sit on the toilet and poop how you want, and I'll continue to clean mine off, and cover it with TP.

[Packet]

I think the major concern is the idea of microscopic shit particles covering the toilet seat. I'm far from a germaphobe but I do cover toilet seats in public bathrooms (if I can't hold it until home) as it irritates me how many men piss on seats.

Seriously, why do people piss all over the place?

PS: I also have a toilet in my office.. thank god. :p

[brockgl]

Cleaner than things that don't generally get cleaned (ever) or at least on a daily basis, yes.

I understand the idea of fomites.

I don't understand why it gets peoples panties in a wad when other people like to be cleanly. It's not like I ask you to do any of the work, and I specifically ended my post with "To each his own."

You are welcome to sit on the toilet and poop how you want, and I'll continue to clean mine off, and cover it with TP.

All I am saying is that you're germaphobia is misplaced. It is a psychological and not an actual danger. I am saying that you spend a LOT of effort cleaning and covering your seat, however, you do not disinfect every doorknob you come in contact with, or put on a rubber glove before you pick out the dollar bills from your wallet. The following two items have been proven to be FAR dirtier than a toilet seat, and yet it is the toilet seat you are afraid of. It is like someone being afraid of house cats, but they are perfectly happy to handle a wild rattlesnake or a brown recluse. Yes the cat COULD scratch you, and there is a very remote possibility that the cat MIGHT have some unknown disease. But 999 times out of 1000 a house cat is going to be harmless. Whereas the chances of you getting hurt handling a wild rattlesnake or brown recluse is far greater, yet you are happy to do so without a second thought.

Not trying to change your mind, just explaining to you the psychology behind it as I see it, and that's it.

[Arkanjil]

germaphobes...

I always hate it when I am in there during my morning poop, and in blasts a fat guy through the door(you can always tell because of the heavy breathing and the jurrasic park style stall shaking,) slams open the stall next to you, hurries to get his pants down and pummels the stall next to you like no other. Pretty much ruins my poo.

ROFL!

[hyzon]

Brock, I'm impressed the amount of my life you inferred from my comments on not wanting to sit on public toilets.

[eqholmes]

To me its all about the mentality. The thought of others crap or pee touching me (my ass) is what gets me, so I enjoy something between my ass and the seat. I remember a time when my friend and I took some of his old underwear (like 10 years old that was from when he was 7 at the time) and got a big pile from his dog and mashed it on the whiteytightys. We then place it in a bag, went to a local 7-11 and took it out of the baggie dropped it on the way in by the doors. Then we parked across the street and filmed people’s reactions, some really funny shit took place, the best was the cop buying some coffee, over looking it going in but then stepping on it, on the way out!!! Was classic, man I want to be a kid again, probably why I found this server.

ya I know off topic a bit, but involes pooooooo

[Excision Rottun]

What is the worst is when you work in a small office, with a fat annoying chick who takes a shit everyday at 9:00am....and refuses to keep the door to the bathroom closed after she is done with the fan one.

Because she doesn't want the bathroom to smell......yea.....I enjoy it much more when the ENTIRE OFFICE and Coffee Machine area are bombed out by your rank deuce.

Then I get to sit there and listen to your inane ramblings all day while I fix your fuck-ups, fun.

[Tallenn]

You really think a few millimeters of paper are going to protect your OCD ass?

I use disinfectant wipes, then just use the bare, newly-cleaned porcelain.

[Taxi]

At my old job there was a motherfucker who, every morning, went to take a huge dump in the toilet, but first put a bunch of toilet paper in the bowl, so his turds would land on top. In the end there was grafitis about this on the side panels like "If we catch you, its tar and feather time". My guess is that its cuz he didnt like spanish people and cleaning girl was spanish XD but who knows, what an ass XD

[Yoite]

this makes me thankful for my job in a small office where i only have to share the men's bathroom with 3 people (including myself) and we are all pretty clean and keep the bathroom clean. We dont have a cleaning lady so we have to clean it ourselves which helps detour pissing all over the place and other nasty things commonly seen in public bathrooms.

[Jeebus]

Mythbusters did a whole episode dedicated to this.

There is NOTHING like the satisfaction of a good poop, except the satisfaction of a good poop taken on company time. But what do I care about toilet covers and public bathrooms - my office has a can of its very own!



Just cuz you're a janitor doesn't mean that your "office" has its very own toilet. (Sorry I had to, im sure you're very successful) lol

[Branaddar]

There are more bacteria and virii on the average workplace keyboard than in any part of a public restroom.

I wonder how many germophobes I just freaked out.

[Alleusion]

There are more bacteria and virii on the average workplace keyboard than in any part of a public restroom.

I wonder how many germophobes I just freaked out.

Especially if you eat at your desk....

[eqholmes]

I'd still rather touch a keyboard and then my face, than touching a toliet and then my face. UNLESS someone has just touched a toliet then my keyboard, O the humanity.

[jilena]

All problems easily solved by only shitting at home!

[km2783]

I have to wonder, if the people mocking the "germophobes" were they slapped in the face with a poo-covered hand and a mud covered hand, would they be FAR angrier at the person that slapped them with the poo-hand?

It's random thoughts like these that get me through the day.


Big house, long hallways, got ten bathrooms, I can shit all day, *****

AR3151 was listening to a song the other day. I thought of it as soon as I saw this thread.

[Branaddar]

I think I'd be angrier at poo-hand, yes.

I dunno, I have reservations about public toilets as well. I avoid them wherever possible. So I'm laughing at myself at the same time, really.

I dunno, it's silly really. Putting your butt cheeks against something, even if it's dirty, does... what exactly? It's not like I finish up, rub my cheeks then lick my hands. Though that image just made me laugh out loud.

[Alleusion]

I have to wonder, if the people mocking the "germophobes" were they slapped in the face with a poo-covered hand and a mud covered hand, would they be FAR angrier at the person that slapped them with the poo-hand?

I have 2 teenagers, a toddler and an infant. The 2 teenagers are 18 months apart....this scenario has happened....

[Alleusion]

I think I'd be angrier at poo-hand, yes.

I dunno, I have reservations about public toilets as well. I avoid them wherever possible. So I'm laughing at myself at the same time, really.

I dunno, it's silly really. Putting your butt cheeks against something, even if it's dirty, does... what exactly? It's not like I finish up, rub my cheeks then lick my hands. Though that image just made me laugh out loud.

Just to let everyone know, Bran is quite the germaphobe himself. Especially when it involves the washing of ones hands and his game controllers.

[jilena]

Ohhh shit you just got called OUT nuccah!