Project 1999

Project 1999 (/forums/index.php)
-   Off Topic (/forums/forumdisplay.php?f=19)
-   -   ******Official politics thread ****** (/forums/showthread.php?t=260341)

maskedmelonpai 06-14-2017 08:22 PM

no, i just reading and feeling happy and wanted to share it :3

mickmoranis 06-14-2017 08:33 PM

if only we could get kaga back, i think since my labotomy him and i finally see eye 3 eye

Xaanka 06-14-2017 08:41 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by mickmoranis (Post 2540368)
thanks to our declined education system, nobody understands what anyone is talking about anymore.

common core is chinese subversion to make us stupid

nilzark 06-14-2017 08:49 PM

I feel like there are a lot of P99 OG's missing these days - I can't tell who is resurrected

maskedmelonpai 06-14-2017 08:52 PM

what a OG??

Lune 06-14-2017 09:04 PM

I was just traveling all over the US and Canada

During my journeys I stayed at this bed and breakfast in the hills above Coeur d'Alene. It was owned by two devout Christians-- some real pious motherfuckers. I'm talking wall-size painted murals of sexy anglo Jesus with his muscular legs spread open spinning a pottery wheel, sexy buff Jesus washing some man's feet, his strong hands glistening in the soapy water, bible quotes all over everything. Clearly no non-procreative sex had ever been performed within 10 miles of this consecrated establishment.

I was sitting on the balcony watching the alpenglow cast over the hills above the lake, drinking my wine after a long day on the road, thinking about what kind of disgusting borderline-illegal porn I was going to watch on my laptop later that night, when this cat wanders up to me and starts getting frisky. He is by far the friendliest cat I've ever met and we get along real well, I spend the next couple hours petting him on my lap while he purrs and I give him some chicken.

The next morning during breakfast I ask the Christian about him and they're like "No, that n**** a stray, he's been here a week and a half, we think he's an unwanted house cat that somebody dumped here" and then they went on to tell me about how they trying to keep it out of the house and off the property. I ask him why they don't at least leave some food out for it so it doesn't starve, and they're like "cats amirite? they just show up and adopt you and expect you to take care of them!" joking about this cat that was wandering around in the forest outside starving to death, desperate for the love of humans. Of course this triggered me but I'm a shy coward so all I did for retribution was leave a hulking 6 pound coiled Texas Roadhouse sewer pickle in their shared bathroom for all the other guests to find before I left that morning. It was unflushable.

This weighed heavily on me and as I drove into Canada thinking, Jesus tells these fucks to be compassionate, to help those less fortunate, and that he who is humbled shall be exalted. Cats are Gods creatures put on this Earth under the care and stewardship of mankind, and it is our responsibility to attend to their wellbeing. Human beings have an ethical responsibility to care for the animals who depend on us.

Cat, if you're out there, I'm so sorry I couldn't help you, and I'm sorry I couldn't find you that morning or I'd have given you my breakfast.

nilzark 06-14-2017 09:09 PM

Lune... that Mary Jane your smoking is not Acapulco Gold, brah ... time to upgrade.

maskedmelonpai 06-14-2017 09:17 PM

it made me sad :c i liek cats. they useful too lotta time. he probably keep they house free of mouses and stuff. some cats it not good to leave food for though. japan have a huge problem with stray cats.

there no rat problem, but cats breed super quick too and they indiscriminate about it, so here a lotta inbreeding and stuff and you end up with lotta retard cats that liek are blind or missing teeth or just dumb and then they suffer and make more liek them because people feel bad for them, so they leave foods for them since they unwilling to adopt them. so then those retard cars survive and confine to make more retard cats that nobody take proper care of. some people bring them into they home and keep them or catch them and fix them so they can't make more, but that very few.

I don't blame you for not adopting him lune. i wouldn't neither, but i sympathize with you feeling for him :c

nilzark 06-14-2017 09:23 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Barkingturtle (Post 2470777)
Smart money's on the Secret Service finding Trump hung with his belt in Melania's shoe-closet, micro-penis still clutched in his cold, dead hand. The Deep State calls this the "Michael Hutchence."

^ P99 OG - usually has the most Erudite responses

Rader 06-14-2017 10:00 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Lune (Post 2540410)
Of course this triggered me but I'm a shy coward so all I did for retribution was leave a hulking 6 pound coiled Texas Roadhouse sewer pickle in their shared bathroom for all the other guests to find before I left that morning. It was unflushable.

LOL, this reminds me of the funniest poetry I ever read on a public restroom wall-

Here I sit
Cheeks a flexin'
Giving birth
To another Texan

No offense meant to those of Texan origin, of course...


All times are GMT -4. The time now is 09:12 PM.

Powered by vBulletin®
Copyright ©2000 - 2025, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.