http://i.imgur.com/D9YaKmu.png
(photo courtesy of Sherriff's Department)
Rivervale has two major exports: Jumjum and Pipeweed. One of our eternal enemies is the dread brownie, Nillipuss. I had slain him a dozen times, but still he returned. I knew this then to be the work of a God.
I captured the 'puss. He would not answer my questions willingly.
"You should go, Mayor Gubbin," I said.
"What - must you torture him?" The kindly Mayor asked in fear.
"Gubbin - GO!"
And he went. I turned to Nillipuss. He would receive the worst torture imaginable. No breakfast every other day!
Under this extreme torture, which is illegal in the realms of Rivervale and the Thicket, Nillipuss finally cracked. He was the lackey of the Goddesss Tunare, who had developed an insatiable Jumtooth - the absolute WORST of teeth.
http://i.imgur.com/ePngzTd.jpg
With my twin blades I cut a path of death through the Plane of Growth, Tunare's home. Many weary hours later I came to a small rise and in a valley laden with empty Jumjum bottles, I found the putrid Goddess herself!
http://i.imgur.com/wOgrzYe.jpg
But we were ambushed! By Nillipuss's uncle Ordro the Unclean! I wrestled him to the dirt and forced him into submission - he admitted to orchestrating the foul plot to steal our Jum.
http://i.imgur.com/YehzZEb.jpg
It was time. Standing with an army of powerful Elf Lords and Ladies we assaulted Tunare. These other Elvish heroes (and villains) had no noble pursuit other than the lust for Tunare's enchanted robes.
http://i.imgur.com/zliVGHA.jpg
At long last the Jumthief perished to my enchanted blades, blades bound by honor to forever defend the sacred Vale. The leader of the elvish army of dragon warriors perished, but the Last Guardian of Rivervale reigned supreme, despite taking a few hits from the terrible Tunare herself.
http://i.imgur.com/xiKLZR3.jpg
I thanked Rallos Zek for my strength and swiftly departed home to my dear Misty Thicket, where I would spend many days recuperating my strength and enjoying the wholesome companionship of young hobbits.
