I don't know if this applies in your case, but I've had the issues you describe in the past.
I resolved them by stopping all other bandwidth usage. For whatever reason the zoning process is not very fault tolerant -- a missed or delayed packet will cause the whole thing to fail requiring you to log in again and start over. Freeing up traffic for EQ made a night and day difference for me.
So if you or anyone else on your connection is using a lot of bandwidth(Other Games, Netflix, Youtube, Torrents) or if you're on a weak wireless connection, try fixing that issue and see if it helps with your EQ zoning.
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