I can't speak for earlier expansions because I didn't play an enchanter at first. However, by the time the Planes of power rolled out, charming was common place. I used to do lots of it in the PoTactics pits and it was a common strategy for Rallos Zek to charm his adds against him.
I would agree with what many saying that it wasn't common in groups in Kunark and Velious. Cc and buffs were the expectation. I found it really unusual grouping my first times in blue in KC in my early 50s when I came back to the game and people expected me to automatically pick up a pet.
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