[Spitty]

I'd like to return these socks.

You see, I believe they have already been used.

The picture, sir, the picture on the bag - well, it appears that these were, at one time in the past, something of a grey-white color.

Gandalf's beard. Imagine Gandalf's beard, plucked and spun into yarn and deftly knitted into these cozy devices to place upon one's feet.

Now, the socks. Sir, the socks in this bag, this bag what I purchased from you not half an hour ago, are not reflective of the merchandise displayed on said bag.

These socks, noble friend, are not grey. They are not white, they are not even a dull, sooty hue as one who works in the coal industry might be seen wearing.

These socks...are brown.