Feels to me like what you really want to play is a rogue. Sure people might sigh when they find our you're not twinked. Sure you'll always be "filler" in every group. However rogues are the most popular and sought after filler usually!
It's rare for a rogue to be asked to tank or pull, and many rogues are so lazy and rude they refuse to do it even when it's objectively correct thing to do.
If you want to melee, but never want to be asked to pull or tank you have to be a rogue. A monk who is the only monk in a group and is indoors will ALWAYS be begged to pull, even if they say they don't want to. The same is true of a paladin or shadowknight being asked to tank in a group without any other knights/warrior. The same is also true of a ranger, but only if they're outdoors, where they are better pullers than monks.
Now of course you could always play your ranger inside, but then you wouldn't really be taking advantage of the one thing rangers are good at.
That said it is IMO much easier to learn to tank in experience groups than it is to learn to pull. Learning to pull means not only learning how to use FD, but also memorizing the wikipedia map (and in even more detail than the map provides) for the area you're "camped" in. Whereas tanking is at first all about hitting disease cloud/taunt once per mob, and then later also about using things like clinging darkness to reduce the speed of a mob that's running away, and also avoiding casting either of those spells on mesmerized npcs at the wrong time.
Although if you want to play p99 like it's 1999 and you want to be a wizard who barely pays attention in his groups until you're level 60, then you have to be a mage on p99 because people don't take that shit from wizards anymore. So I'd recommend you either open yourself up to learning, OR play a mage/rogue. I think the most fun option though will be to open yourself up to learning. People don't expect level 9-19 pullers or tanks to actually be that competent! Leveling up will takes weeks/months and give you time to improve as much as is needed to not get "scolded".
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