Honestly, one of the great things about playing a monk is that you really don't need to stress about weapons and gear as much as other classes. While a fighting baton or similar would be nice, many of the monks on this server leveled up with nothing but fists and mesh/cloth armor. The point I'm trying to get at is that I wouldn't worry about gear or money much, focus almost exclusively on leveling and gear will come.
As for weight, obviously it is ideal to stay under the penalty level, however, if you're not soloing/tanking it isn't vitally important. This is actually one area where us old timers had it easy, because almost everyone had a 100% WR box because they were so common and rotted so often. Without weight reduction bags, I personally would carry the bare minimum - maybe 1 or 2 containers tops. Just enough for food/water/bandages/shurikans/whatever.
As far as mend, use it whenever it pops. Until you get into the 70s and 80s for skill, it is so unreliable that the idea of "saving it" to get you out of a tight spot or finish off a mob doesn't really make a lot of sense.
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