Tekilia Pu'Tang's T.I.T.S.: Crushboned Part II - New Knowledge, New Friends

[Jotei]

Tekilia Putang's
Truly Inspiring Traveler's Saga
Crushboned! - New Knowledge, New Friends

by

Tekilia Pu'Tang

for fun

The heavy walnut doors snapped open in silent reverence as Tekilia shot into the castle like a butterfly riding lightning.

"You are no match for a legionnaire!!" growled one of her pursuers.
"You are no match for Pu'Tang" she retorted smugly
"[orc legionaire] is looking for an ass beating. Let us oblige it!" she called to her companions in the Throne Room.

Tekilia dashed inaudibly down the entrance corridor of Castle Crushbone, nimbly avoiding the wild swipe of a centurion as she passed the welcome alcove.

"Hail Emperor Crush!!" it cired before joining the pursuit.

Tekilia zipped around the corner into the Throne Room and crashed clean into Jonn, faithful minion of Takato. Jonn snorted as it reconstituted itself. Tekilia sucked at her teeth in frustration as she shook off some of the excesss water. She was drenched. Her white linen pants and halter sucked transluscently to her shapely figure like a second skin and most of the floor around the Dining Hall was slick from her collision with the water elemental. The orcs wouldn't know that though. She smiled to herself.

The orcs came crashing around the corner howling like the mad animals they were only to tumble over one another as they crossed the wet floor. Enraged, the orcs turned on one another, lashing out in frustration at whatever was within reach. Tekilia seized the opportunity and dove into the melee along with Jonn and the other elemental minions of her tiny companions.

Tekilia was a torrent of righteous fury and precision. Her thick rods shattered skulls, her dainty feet snapped spines and her petite hands emasculated orcs.

It was only earlier that morning that she had realized the purpose of the Tiger Claw technique. Master Closk of the Ashen Hand had instructed it much the same way as the Pu'Tang Masters of her homeland and she received perfect marks at examine. There was no question, her technique was perfect. Master Closk had marveled at her precision and praised her abilities, but there had never been any direction as to prime targets as always there was with other techniques: a fist to the stomach, a palm to the chin, fingers to eyes, knee to groin, so on and so forth.

The Tiger Claw was a low strike, executed while crouching and more often than not it caught more air than foe. Nonetheless it seemed to take much of the fight out of her opponents. Tekilia had chocked it up as another method to Instill Doubt, a mental assault. That was until this morning when a distracted adversary stumbled forward as she executed the attack and her hand came back with a fist full of orc parts. Now she understood its purpose and applied that understanding with great efficiency. Orcs squealed left and right as they were taken by Tekilia's Tiger Claw.

"TIGER CLAW!!! Your balls are mine!" she cried as the last orc met its death in shared shame with the rest of its comrades.

One of her tiny companions chuckled, clapping his hands enthusiastically in sadistic approval as orc parts flew overhead out the castle window. There was still a nasty blue smear on the wall from the first set of orc parts she'd claimed. She'd be taken with fleeting horror at what had happened before the warm waters of understanding washed over her.

She smiled in recollection of her naivete as she rinsed her hands clean in Jonn. Jonn snorted as she withdrew. Her tiny companions sat in a row atop the Dining Table. They'd made it their mission to defile the Castle Crushbone in every way possible. and took great delight in Tekilia's newfound savagery as they regarded it.

Tekilia had learned much of mischief from them, but had also learned they were an intelligent people with a deep love of the arcane. Indeed each commanded powerful elemental magics. Tekilia had no love for magic, but had come to respect the martial prowess of the elemental constructions they had mastered. She also held great appreciation for the various objects they could summon for her use. They represented an endless supply of kunai and bandages and battle companions that neither tired nor faltered.

One of the gnomes hopped down from her seat atop the table and handed Tekilia a dimensional pocket full of bandages.
"Dry off," she squeaked glancing furtively to her male companions.
"Oh, THANK you, Gnopanteez!" Tekilia replied, taking note of the fact that the other two mages locked in meditation were staring directly at her.
"How much longer until they are ready to continue," she bent and whispered to the little woman.
"They're full mana. Dry off," she repeated once more.

The two little gnomes locked in their meditative trances continued to stare at Tekilia as she wrung the excess water from her things and dried off next to Gnopanteez' fire elemental. When she'd finished, she saw the gnomes had broken from their trances and were conversing between themselves in their native tongue.

"Dingly bing my wonkly puu."
"Nang dang tiki niki ban ban!"
"Huehuehuehuehueeeheheheh!"

Gnopanteez glowered at the two. All stopped and turned their attention to Tekilia as she approached.

"Teach me your language, little people. I would like to join in your conversations."

"How?" questioned Takato.

Having mastered Antonican, Pu'Tangese and Seahorse, Tekilia was a master linguist. She explained the ins and outs of how language is learned, the best methods for success and the role of the teacher in administering lessons. Takato agreed to help her by limiting himself to his native tongue while conversing in their party. Tekilia was pleased.

And so it was that Tekilia Pu'Tang, Savior of Faydark, Defender of Freeport, Heir to the Pu'Tang Throne passed the late weeks of the warm spring of Operation Elven Freedom of the greater Crushbone Annihilation Campaign of 3305.