The Ark of Flames

[SyanideGas]

Filbus, can I be God, because world trying to be destroyed etc? You know...

[maskedmelon]

For it is written:

"21. And when the forum has grown stale and yellow, rank with the moldy stench of codgers and crones clad in the stagnant pall of death and decay, there shall it be so that the people shall of themselves craft a union of creative liberty, exceptional lunacy and generally trolling in nature.
22. But for this virtuous band might the worlds perish.
23. From the stank of old kinds and ill fortune shall he come, blasphemer and deceiver, twister of words, false prophet of a false god.
24. Unto them who know virtue and honor and the ways that are right, unto them shall he utter in silence the ample yearning of his own demise."

Mirai no Unme 76.43.237.21:24

[captnamazing]

Originally Posted by maskedmelon [You must be logged in to view images. Log in or Register.]

For it is written:

"21. And when the forum has grown stale and yellow, rank with the moldy stench of codgers and crones clad in the stagnant pall of death and decay, there shall it be so that the people shall of themselves craft a union of creative liberty, exceptional lunacy and generally trolling in nature.
22. But for this virtuous band might the worlds perish.
23. From the stank of old kinds and ill fortune shall he come, blasphemer and deceiver, twister of words, false prophet of a false god.
24. Unto them who know virtue and honor and the ways that are right, unto them shall he utter in silence the ample yearning of his own demise."

Mirai no Unme 76.43.237.21:24

And Filbus crafted a singular room within the Ark of Flames, so that Maskedmelon, a poster of great equanimity, who could use the Power Word: Troll and yet oft refrained from shit posting, might join in the Ark when the time was nigh, and the floods of Chests tears washed from the face of the Boards all those unrepentant posters.

[maskedmelon]

Originally Posted by captnamazing [You must be logged in to view images. Log in or Register.]

And Filbus crafted a singular room within the Ark of Flames, so that Maskedmelon, a poster of great equanimity, who could use the Power Word: Troll and yet oft refrained from shit posting, might join in the Ark when the time was nigh, and the floods of Chests tears washed from the face of the Boards all those unrepentant posters.

Into the room Maskedmelon brought all manner of good things, stowing each neatly and orderly as is right. To each its own number was rendered and duly recorded in ink and in parchment such that each might be known to all who might know to ask and that none should be forgotten.

Chest saw this and Chest was pleased. Unto Filbus He sent three pale virgins of goodly nature, ample of bosom, fair of form, all pleasing and right. To each He conferred one-third the the gross sum of grace and seemliness and good talent of all maidens the world over.

[captnamazing]

[You must be logged in to view images. Log in or Register.]

In the six day of Filbus's logs, on the twenty-sixth day of the twelfth month—on that day all the springs of the great deep burst forth, and the floodgates of the heavens were opened. And Chest's tears fell on the earth sixty days and sixty nights.

On that very day Filbus and his sons, Kekephee, Nibblewitz, and Lotharus, together with his Grumphilda and the wives of his three sons, entered the ark. They had with them every type of shit post according to its kind, all salty tears according to their kinds, every neckbeard that moves along the ground according to its kind and every autofiring tranny according to its kind, and all the flaming members of BDA.

Pairs of all creatures that have used poopsock in righteousness came to Filbus and entered the ark. The neckbeards going in were male and only a few females, as Chest had commanded Filbus. Then Chest shut him in.

For sixty days the purging flood kept coming on the Boards, and as the waters increased they lifted the ark high above the Forums. The waters rose and increased greatly on the boards, and the ark floated on the surface of the tears.

They rose greatly on the earth, and all the high poop mountains under the entire heavens were covered. The waters rose and covered the peaks of shit to a depth of more than fifteen cubits.

Every living neckbeard that still posted on the boards perished from boredom—retarded posters, TMO alts (asgard), wild Swishes, all the creatures that swarm over the rotten boards, and all anonymous Forsaken accounts.

Everything on the boards that had the breath of life in its nostrils died. Every living thing on the face of the forums was wiped out; cringing people and goog animals and the poopsock creatures that move along the ground and the Yellow-Text birds were wiped from the earth. Only Filbus was left, and those with him in the ark.

The waters flooded the earth for over sixty days.

[captnamazing]

And so the ship sailed; and the ignorant cried for the ark to return. But Filbus was resolute in the guidance of Chest. They stuffed wool in their ears to the cries of FQers drowning in boredom.