Confessions of a Rageaholic

[Straif]

Originally Posted by Hasbinbad [You must be logged in to view images. Log in or Register.]

That's not an either/or question..

Honestly, as long as you're able to perceive the issue without help, you're really the only one that can help you.

I recommend you snap out of it.

You're perfectly able to decide to change. Anyone who tells you different is probably in therapy or on meds. You need a healthy dose of "fuck people" in your diet, and you'll be all good.

..as far as being angry about shit.. ..there are some non-therapy-style skill building classes (anger management, but shop around first, a lot of them are touchy-feely bullshit) that might be of use to you. I have seen people go through that shit and retain who they are without being all aggro and shit, because they have specific mental tools they can use to mitigate their natural urges.

To be honest with you the "fuck people" mentally is what drove me early on to focus on my personal goals. It worked well, I was literally the type of person to walk around with my fists clenched and my normal facial expression forged into a scowl. At some point I became desensitized, more than likely when people began to give me praise or acknowledgment. I always remained humble and tried to maintain that I had made progress but self-improvement isn't a destination it's a constant process of evolution. Those who stop improving simply decide to.

I've stagnated.

While my stern discipline and gruff demeanor helped me block out all the bullshit, it shunned away a lot of positive stuff as well. I need a balance. I was described a person people didn't find approachable. When I let my guard down and saw the other side I sort of became conflicted with whats right / wrong. In actuality... that's probably my issue right there, not focusing on what truly matters to me. Sort of what you've already said...

If the solution has never been to look in myself. How is it that I expect to find it anywhere else.