Posting here.

[clevergirl]

Is like reliving that singular defining horrific moment. Being unable to avoid it. Powerless to stop it. Or look away. Always looking back. And coming back for more. Unable to change it. Looking back doesn't stop it.

I really want to stop. I'm disappointed every single time. It's a never ending fucking horror show. Sometimes I wish it would end if I look back here. Like looking at the forum is certain death. At least then, I'd cease to look.