Feel free to send me a PM if you have further questions.
You told me to keep it here, and I am. There are no questions other than wtf are you doing. You've gave the impression that anything flies here. If it doesn't then sticky it in this forum as well. That way there IS no question.
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The internet is a cruel, anonymous fight club where your weaknesses will be exploited and your fears used against you. Use the internet for entertainment and maybe information, as long as you realize that most of it is false. But if your sole social circle exists entirely online, you're already fucked if you can't hack it alone, because you are.