Well...

[starkind]

I decided a few years ago to stop seeking medical treatment for my severe illness because the chances that I will get better and contribute to society don't justify it. It was the main factor in my last major suicide attempt.

I'm not encouraging others to feel the same. And out of respect for my loved ones I've decided to stay the course even if that means spending 19hrs a day in bed at home a virtual cripple.

The only things that keep me going are small and trivial, yet I focus on the little good and try to troll my way towards a better tomorrow.

I can't find my dumb cat this morning. He's being a real shithead unintentionally. It hurts so much to crawl around looking for him. He needs his dumb shot.

He's been doing really well. The only reason he's being a pain in the ass is because he's been rehabilitated enough to be able to be a damn jerk.

It's ok to be restarted. Once everyone is perfect and acting perfectly all u get left is stepford abusive toxicity and conformity.

So I lay myself down and pray to God not for me. I can read his words and have faith that in the end I'll be at peace.

I pray for all of you mother Fulkersons.

Love yall.