10kpp Giveaway, all welcome to participate

[joppykid]

Although I don't condone the actions of my friend in this story, its pretty funny.

My friend who was a Barbarian Warrior would go around looking for corpses and sending tells to people saying he would loot and bring their gear to them ( this was when you could loot others with /consent. So basically he would loot their corpses and take their gear and was notorious on the server. He had a full set of crafted at lvl 10. He also had an inappropriate name at one point that was changed by the GMs to Roseblossom lol

[Herky]

Everquest was the first MMO I actually convinced my bible thumpin' parents to let me play. UO was too wizardy/occultic and I just barely convinced Dad to give a pass on EQ by promising I'd play a Paladin. (This is the same Dad featured in Trelaboon's story, btw) So in the summer of 1999 I began playing the game and extolling its virtues to all of my friends.

Within two years, I began dating a nice cutie who was into "geeky" stuff, and I convinced her to play EQ with me. She rolls a character and first logs in, when a mutual RL friend whispers her: "We're sooo going to twink your ass!"

She immediately got up and walked away from the computer, and it took extensive convincing before she believed my explanation of what that meant. To this day she doesn't like that guy, figuring he's a "creep" lol.

So fast forward to project 1999's beginning. I was living in Japan at the time, making a living as an English teacher while exploring the world... I was dating a very beautiful bilingual Japanese girl and had convinced her to try playing as well. She wasn't as keen, unfortunately, but I got her to at least give it a shot. (And let me explain that she was the full package, as far as I was concerned.. I very much wanted to marry her.)

So Sunday morning, we wake up in my apartment bedroom and I boot up the PC and log in, then have her sit in the computer chair and start guiding her through the ropes of making a new character.

Meanwhile, I'm standing behind her and to the left a bit, offering advice... I feel a massive morning fart bubbling in my guts, and figure I'll try for a squeaker but wasn't too concerned since I've let some nasty sounding ones rip in front of her before. (The Japanese are pretty cool about "normal bodily functions")

I sort of bend the knees a bit, a vaguely squatting motion, and let it rip... surprisingly, not a sound escapes.

Likewise surprisingly, I feel a significant amount of something escape.

At this point, time enters into slow motion. My face immediately burns with the shame of what just happened, oh god oh god please no, and I look down to see the confirmation of a cowpie (shaman pie?) directly below me.

It completely bypassed my (loose) boxers and landed in a gelatinous circle between my feet.

This cannot be happening, oh no, no no no, did she notice?? I look back up at her and she is intent on the character creation screen. "Hrmm, I don't like gnomes... they're too short!"

I mutter an agreeable response while the majority of my brain is in full fledged panic; what do I do?! This is beyond the worst nightmare I've ever imagined.

So I do what any reasonable panicky Everquester in this situation would do; I start fake sneezing.

"Oh man, allergies", I whisper lamely. "Could you hand me the tissues?"

She hands me the box, thank god for small miracles, and I begin pulling a few and really unconvincingly begin "blowing my nose", then furtively try to sop up last night's now-soupy sushi.

"What stat is good for wizards?"
"Strength and stamina", I answer automatically.

I continue this sneezing act while halfheartedly guiding her through the minutiae of creating a character, (to this day I don't honestly remember a single detail of what she ended up with), while amassing a significant pile of nasty wet brown tissues in my trash can. (Thank goodness for plastic bag liners!)

This whole time I'm debating in my mind as to whether she is just being a really good sport about the whole thing or if somehow angels have kept her attention away from the utter disaster occurring slightly behind her and to the left.

"Yep", I think to myself, "that's a pretty tell-tale stain on the carpet." I move the trashcan onto the stain, dreading how incredibly suspicious it looks in its new, very inconvenient, totally in the way location. "I'm going to.. I'm going to go take a shower", I tell her with what I hoped was nonchalance.

"OK honey," she replies sweetly.

She must really not have any clue. I say a prayer of thanks to Erollisi and start padding towards the shower.

I immediately feel a squishy wet sensation on my right foot, look down, and barely restrain my curses...

Yep, in my panic, I have now stepped in my own feces. My sock was soaked, and had left a pretty obvious trail away from Ground Zero. I urgently look at her, but Lo: Miracle of Miracles, she's still riveted by the character creation process.

I slip off my sock and disappear down the hallway.

To this day, I'm thoroughly convinced she never noticed it (through no small effort of distraction on my part; as soon as she quit playing EQ I whisked her out of the apartment on some pretense or other) and although we did eventually end up breaking up, it wasn't because she saw me poop myself, fake-sneeze my way to a trashcan full of brown tissues, and then step in it while making my escape to the shower.

Thankfully, even a decade after its release, Project 1999 proved EQ to be as immersive and captivating to new players as it was when I first began playing.

This is my story, shame and all.

[Atmas]

So like others have pointed out many of the most memorable experiences come with playing EQ with real life friends.

I always enjoy playing games with my rl friends so I spent sometime convincing my friend to play EQ back in the day on TZ. He rolls up a Paladin and gives it an asenine name, Schionatulander (I think some guy in some book).

My character was already in the 50s so I could impart the basics as well as spare him a few hundred plat. I make certain to inform him that he should never buy any armor off the vendor as it is ludicriously overpriced. Had we been in a sitcom there would have been a screen wipe and text that read "3 minutes later..." when I received a tell "check out these awesome pants!!"

So the tales of Schionatulander began. Most of the early experiences revolved around PvP against a character named Gnomwed who would chase him around and killl him then send him a message telling him "you've been Gnowmed." This continued until one day he blinded Gnomwed in Kelethin who then promptly fell to his death. He and Gnowmed laughed it over and Schionatulander came to the realization that he could be a dominant PvP force with against players who could not see him. The fighting from then on went well, with the exception of the occasional high MR twink or player who argued that they had only been beaten due a graphics card malfunction.

After not seeing Schionatulander on for a few weeks I asked my friend where he had been. He told me about his adventuring in Mistmoore. That while partying in the GY his group had felled a mob that dropped the highly coveted Crested Helm. He looted the helm and and the party rolls were away! As the other members of the group congratulated the winner he watched as his camp timer ticked down. Schionatulander was not to bee seen in Norath for 3 moons.

Schionatulander's adventures continued taking him across the continents. I would occasionally recieve word of the insights he gained as he traveled. "WTF man, this Puma was attacking me in the Commonlands and I managed to run into the Inn but it came through the wall and still ate my ass!"

Eventually another period of time came where I couldn't recall having seen Schionatulander on in recent memory. When I asked him if he had ninjaed another item he told me "I lost my corpse, so I quit." I suppose this happens to many people, just not that often at level 42.

The Return of Schionatulander on P99:
So once again the draw of EQ pulled me back. I convinced a few of my friends who had played on live to come try P99. Schionatulander was less than enthusiastic about playing a hardcore MMO again. After a few minutes of talking with him on the phone, informing him some of our other mutual friends were playing, and him calling these friends to confirm I wasn't just trying to perform a ruse he rolled up another paladin, Schionatulander. My wiz was already 12 and I heard numerous complaints from him every step of the way as he progressed to level 3.

Everyone agreed to meet up by Felwithe since we were all in Gfay. I arrived first followed by two of our friends. They formed a group and went off to kill some bats just a little walk away in the Gfay woods. Schionatulander shows up and talks a little bit about being tired.

As I run forward into the woods to show him where our other friends went I launch into a tirade about the glory day of MMOs. I give a motivational talk on level with the President's speech in the film Independence Day. I deliver lines worthy of a coach's prep talk in the final seconds of a historically significant sporting event. After which Schionatulander gives me a resounding "Yeah!"

He charges boldy into the woods to join the fray and runs right past or other friends fighting mobs... I watch him run for a little bit and out of sight and send him a tell:

"Um you ran past them..."
Schionatulander is not online at this time.

Momments later my phone buzzes from a text message. "Im not playing anymore"

And so ends the heralding tale of Schionatulander.

I guess it wasn't too surprising, of my other 3 friends playing none of them made it past level 5. The first to go was a guy who had only played WoW and rolled up a Ranger... The direct quote for the reason he quit was "A lack of instant gratification."

[jadefoot]

Herky's story nearly had me in tears, I don't think I can hold a candle to him (not sure I would want to if he had that kind of gas again lol) but I'll throw my story in too.

I had been playing for a couple of years on live and had leveled up a druid to about 53 or so, I would stop in from time to time and get the Pyzjn cycle going to make some extra pp. While doing this I would usually pick up on tracking whoever was waiting for Hadden to spawn, an idea started to form that I couldn't resist.

I camped out and went to create a new barbarian named: Haden (it wouldn't let me do Hadden), I ran him down to Blackburrow and somehow managed to get him through by the skin of his lvl 1 teeth to Qeynos Hills. You can already see where this is going, I run over to the exact spot where Hadden spawns and stand there for a few minutes. While I'm waiting I make a hotkey that says something along the lines of: "Fool! Time to die Soandso!" I had even picked up a fishing pole so I really looked the part.

Sure enough this halfling druid pops up right across that pond and I see him firing up a spell at me. . . boom! He starts casting like crazy at me and doesn't let up, he tries every spell at his disposal to take me down, over and over until he finally sits down unsure of what to do. I hit /camp and right before I vanish I say: "You'll never get my earring!"

I log back onto my druid that I had parked nearby and run over to the guy and ask him: "Hey I just had Hadden on track! Did you kill him? Did he drop the earring?"

The poor guy tells me: "Man I couldn't touch him! I threw everything I had at him and he just wouldn't go down!" I remember saying something like: "Aww bummer, he must be bugged or something."

Whenever I was bored I would pop in as Hadden and see who would fall for it, more than half the people waiting for him to pop would try in desperation to get that elusive earring [You must be logged in to view images. Log in or Register.]

[scourge42]

This is the story of how Mildarg the Enchanter trolled the town of freeport in back in 1999. It all started with a level one spell called minor illusion and and sinister yet genius plan. Mildarg lvl 40 at the time parked himself int he middle of the freeport arena. He took off one of his many back packs and threw it onto the ground and cast minor illusion on himself to become a copy of the backpack. The trap has now been set. Mildarg Screams to the low level citizens of freeport. "Come one, come all! A free bag of gear to who ever can reach the arena first" A young new blod human monk walks into the arena seeing only the bag infront of him he thinks "jackpot!" the young monk rushes to the back. Click Click Click the monk wondered why can't i pick this bag up? Then while letting out a tremendous laugh Mildarg transformed back into his true form. Before the monk could even turn around he was already mesmerized by the beautiful high elf enchanter looking him dead in the eye. Mildarg casted root to hold him in place then decided to sit and meditate on the situation for a few minutes. Once Mildarg was at full mana he decided to have funw ith his new friend and casted tornado and laughed as the monk spun in circles. He then blinded the monk with a powerful spell giving him time to slip into a corner and cast invisibility on himself. Soon the monk was alone with root starting to fade he thought maybe he was free. When root broke he ran for the door But WAIT! Mildarg casts mesmerize and freezes him only inches away from freedom. Frustrated and annoyed the young monk decided his only option was to camp and wait till later, little did he know Mildarg would be waiting there for his return.

I must of caught 4-5 different people that day I never killed any of them I just tortured them with spells and mockery.

[Koa Bosk]

To: Jadefoot, HAHAHAHAAHAHAHHAAHAHHAHA. Oh my eyes so full of tears laughing so hard.

Everquest, $20
Project 1999, $0
A set of Twinked gear, a few thousand plat
Playing EQ with friends and swapping stories, priceless.

[NGHpnotiq]

When my roommate got into EQ, He had to upgrade his graphics card to play the game. Well at the time being a very young lad he wasn't very computer suave and didn't install the card correctly.

So he made a Dwarf to start with and because of the botched installation He Couldn't Zone out of Kaladim. So he spent almost a week killing rats in Kaladim, I think he got to level 6 or 7 off those rats. During this time he even had a letter he needed to turn in, and not understanding how the game worked He tried asking everyone who came into the city to go turn in this letter for him as he couldn't leave the city! Eventually after many frustrated hours not understanding why He wasn't getting experience anymore and why NOBODY would help him finish this quest he finally figured out his graphics card wasn't done properly! And thus lives the tale of Zonshadoo.

[Billatoras]

Hello folks ,

I used to play EQ on the Rathe server and this story i am going to share happened in my first steps when i was a newbie.

My little Ranger was going to join a party in Crushbone , his first group experience. We all gathered at entrance and we started the hunting after a while. After couple pulls i was seeing some of the rest party members calling some 'numbers' in party chat.

Partymember1 says : 60

Partymember2 says : 75

and so on ...

In the beginning i didnt pay much attention to it , i was so excited with the fighting.

Although it kept happening again and again . I was wondering myself ...

What were those numbers?! Do they have a meaning? It was a mystery to me and i wanted to solve it!

Do i have to call a number in party chat also?

And again ...

Partymember1 says : 35

Partymember2 says : 45

It was driving me crazy! I was about to start typing random numbers in party chat.

There was only one way to find out , i had to ask!
I had to learn the purpose of this!


And as you all know , it was just their mana report.

The response i got dissapointed me a bit to be honest [You must be logged in to view images. Log in or Register.]

[cobykoby]

My first ever character was a human paladin, I soon found out that night time vision was not one of my strong points after I ventured past west freeport and into EC after following a wood elf...I was mauled by many a bear until I learned that nighttime travel was indeed to be avoided....however..

I continued to level up until eventually It was time for me and my pensioner vision to attempt a trip to Kunark, I followed guildies advice and took a shuttle boat from butcherblock, awaiting patiently on the platform, I was finally going places! I dreamt up images of the kunark ruins, the beauty of the seaside town Firiona Vie and my eventual ascendence to godhood with a fiery sword.

But my eyes had other ideas.

I zoned out of butcherblock on the shuttle which I was told would take me to a much larger boat, which I would then proceed to climb upon and begin my adventure. It was night time and my poorly human eyes struggled to adjust to the night time enviroment, I was essentially blind and proceeded to make mole like facial expressions, wincing at the screen. I then assumed perhaps I was already on the boat and maybe it would light up, So I edged my way around and heard a splash.
It appeared I had fallen in the bloody water and panic set in.

At this time light begins to come around and I do indeed see the larger ship, but it's buggering off in a different direction and I am currently in a vast amount of water, of which I never been in or near before and I immediatly announce my problem to fellow guildmates who then proceed to tell me a bloody dragon also lives in the same water.

"Bollocks"

I decide I can't just sit floating there so I best try and go back or find some landmass, I forget which way I need to go 'back' but I do however find a rather large island with a hill, "Thank fuck for that I think" and swim towards it hastily, hoping the dragon (which i later find out is more like a fish and for the druid epic) isn't about to eat me. Now, being a paladin I don't have gate, this is also my first character so I'm rather ill equipped to deal with most situations bar running around undead camps.

I proceed to make my way up onto the island when I find it is inhabited by nothing less than undead iksars, again I say bollocks multiple times and decide it's better to be on this island than in the water with the dragon, I make my way up the hill and try to make a new plan of action.

Sadly no plan of action actually materialised and I ended up sobbing like a child with my dodgy eyes until thankfully a druid, out of bloody nowhere finds me up the hill looking down at the undead and takes pity, porting me back home where I can one day again attempt my voyage into the unknown.
:edit: I was actually sobbing for around 3 hours
I didn't attempt the to man the shuttles for weeks, thanks a lot human eyes.

[Sniperfire]

right before they ended sullon zek i decided to quit eq so i sat in the bazaar and sold my account over and over to noobs for 5-7 million plat a pop then gave them fake infos.
i did this 30 or 40 times at the end of it i would have 3 or 4 people standing around me saying "dont give him any plat hes a scammer" and still the noobs bought plat to fill my coffers. i sold my account along with 60 million plat for 5k dollars paypal.

savra so you know who did it son