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  #11  
Old 01-07-2018, 04:14 PM
SamwiseRed SamwiseRed is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by jakerees [You must be logged in to view images. Log in or Register.]
Yes that is true that it is time to discuss the area from Qeynos to the high pass and from Permafrost down to the Rathe region as I am not sure how much attention this vast region gets and I don't mean the overworked areas around paw or the giants of rathe or even the giants of ice but I know in my first travels to this region was by way of the high pass and it always made me feel like I was walking slower after I entered into the eastern plains of karana and came down the mountain but I'm sure it was always just an optical illusion caused by the openness of this region compared to the east as you travel through the commonlands and kithicor forest. As an aside it should be noted that optical illusion is being used in the scientific way and not as a slang term to refer to genitalia as it is often used here but I believe we all can agree that the necessity exists to distinguish between the two. I marvel that there exists in this world the half horse half man creature of the karanas and it would of course be nice if they existed as a playable race but alas as the old live everquest went downhill and decided to introduce cat people and then frog people they ignored the overwhelming demand to be able to play as horse people. Also to play as elephants. And so we find ourselves dodging cyclops in the karanas and we can even roleplay to our hearts desire at one of the many farms that dot these lands that we have gone the way of Cincinnatus and thrown down our weapons and our leadership and return to a simpler life. I know I have found myself equipping a shovel in my day and tending the fields, and have even taken to a farmer's daughter (or wife?) that I found in the farm house, much akin to your normal way of life in rural Kansas, or Nebraska as we again find that p99 can imitate real life so well.

I have to admit that I was somewhat disappointed in the Barbarian town of Halas and its lack of lively entertainment, not entertainment in general just lively entertainment, but it is a good place to rest before you make your way across the frozen tundra to the place that is called Permafrost. It has been said that the gateway to this dungeon home of ice goblins is guarded by giants made of ice, but alas I do not believe the tales as the only thing that greets me as I pass through these gates is a druid in the form of a dog that seems to be staring at nothing, or a pile of bones hovering above the ground, and it makes me sad that skeletons cannot just sit down like normal people and that they have to just collapse and disguise themselves as the cache of bones kept horded by a common junkyard dog, and sometimes I try to loot these bones but it just shows me items that a weak person might wear, much as if they were a common bum wandering the roads or railyards, and that of course leads you to draw parallels between trains at the railyards and trains in the land of Norrath, and the biggest similarity between them is that they both have a conductor who can ruin your life if they want to unless they just go ahead and let themselves die. The best part of your trip to the west region of Antonica however would have to be the isolation and serenity that is afforded from a visit to the large lake in the Rathe region as you can utilize a cabin tucked in to the mountains that surround the lake for peace and quiet and just remove yourself from your cares as you grab a canoe to traverse the lake for good fishing and perhaps go for a swim after removing your armor just like that time you spent at a summer camp in real life before it was interrupted by some hockey mask machete wielding freak and I assure you that it will not happen here unless I happen by in a dented brass mask with a trust 1hs weapon but I won't do that unless I do but you won't see it coming unless you do. Just don't do a / who while you are there to keep it a surprise. WTB Shaman Epic 6k
drugs?
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  #12  
Old 01-07-2018, 04:35 PM
skarlorn skarlorn is offline
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Contrary to popular opinion, I believe jakerees is not under the influence of heavy drugs. More likely coffee and a little herb than anything. These sacred texts are directly linked to the will of the Retarded God and are deep plunges into Jake's mental network of subconscious connection and object association.
  #13  
Old 01-07-2018, 10:22 PM
fadetree fadetree is offline
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It's true, he may the next Avatar of Retardation. We'll have to see. But there is actual wisdom in his raving, so he'll have to get rid of that before ascending.
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  #14  
Old 01-07-2018, 10:36 PM
Casteel Casteel is offline
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OP used the words, "farmer's daughter" and "genitalia" -- instantly garnering 5 stars.
  #15  
Old 01-08-2018, 04:16 PM
Evia Evia is offline
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The more I think on this post the more brilliant it becomes. This shit is total classic! Kinda reminds me of sk8ter gnome!
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  #16  
Old 01-08-2018, 04:20 PM
skarlorn skarlorn is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by jakerees [You must be logged in to view images. Log in or Register.]
It has been said that the gateway to this dungeon home of ice goblins is guarded by giants made of ice, but alas I do not believe the tales as the only thing that greets me as I pass through these gates is a druid in the form of a dog that seems to be staring at nothing, or a pile of bones hovering above the ground,
very very poignant shit
  #17  
Old 01-09-2018, 09:48 AM
SunDrake SunDrake is offline
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I also loved this. I have never given a post any stars and I 5 star'd it. If you can't decipher variations on the English language, that's more of a you problem than an OP problem. [You must be logged in to view images. Log in or Register.]
  #18  
Old 01-10-2018, 04:40 PM
Scoojitsu Scoojitsu is offline
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I like it. [You must be logged in to view images. Log in or Register.] There is more?
  #19  
Old 01-10-2018, 06:32 PM
One Tin Soldier One Tin Soldier is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by jakerees [You must be logged in to view images. Log in or Register.]
I know I have found myself equipping a shovel in my day and tending the fields................much akin to your normal way of life in rural Kansas, or Nebraska as we again find that p99 can imitate real life so well.
Maybe it's akin to real life if the shovel has an air conditioned cab and costs a quarter million dollars.
  #20  
Old 01-10-2018, 06:56 PM
spoof2424 spoof2424 is offline
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and as diplomatic as dented brass masks have become since friday the 13th happened in 2017 2018 has new snacks we have yet to see.

Quite the chip on you about western antonica. explore moar!
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