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Old 01-26-2020, 02:56 PM
kaelseren kaelseren is offline
Large Rat


Join Date: Oct 2014
Posts: 6
Default Seal Team's Spokesperson, Patchet the Living Cliche

Once upon a time...

So here we were yesterday, enjoying a nice evening with Bats & Bugs in Solb. The sights and sounds of nature looping over and over again for hours on end. A lovely group of everyone from Seal Team to Kingdom to Venerate to Fires From Heaven.

So the exps are rolling in. Hours are passing. People come and go. So i'm a few ticks from 50. As is seen if one stays in SolB for more than 10 minutes, all of a sudden there will be a swarm of Seal Team killing giants. Although I am unsure if it is a policy of theirs to not give a damn about training mobs, they do it all the time.

Basically, BnB is the focal point of their trains. After some numb nuts trains too many, sometimes the entrance becomes a mess when they pussy out. Anyhow, EVERYONE in solb has suffered through this. If they cared, it's simple enough to just kill all the shit on their way to giants. No camp will much care as they would rather ST kills the bullshit rather than get trained. We all have no problem waiting for respawns over rezzes. Hell p99 itself is a bootleg respawn. Whatever, I guess it is something they can ponder.

To be fair, each and every time I have seen trains, an ST cleric will apologize and rez the person when they're called out. In fact, they are really good with this. SO, as a guild, pretty solid in my opinion. Anyhow, we all know this happens CONSTANTLY so no need to get into it much. Enough preamble.

So here we are at BnB and some necro named Khashi starts creepily slumming around our camp. If I was a gambling man, he was trying to poach Nox. Other than pulling one mob on us that we easily killed, he just seemed like a pedophile at a park; patiently watching.

Time passes... All of a sudden, we see a bard named Milleas. Next thing four fire imps and an elemental or two. Showing the better part of valor, I gate. I think 2 in group died. Yeah, no bigs, the mage lives.

I send an /ooc to see if the douchers will confess. I get a response, maybe it was sincere, asking if I have proof... Come on man, it happens all the time when ST enters the zone; of course it was ST. However, I go back to camp to assess the situation. Who is at the camp killing away? Yeah you guessed it, Khashi and Milleas... Likely wanting the int bracer. In any event, after calling them straight out in /OOC neither denied doing it.

So, a couple ST that I am cool with send me a few tells knowing damn well ST trained the stuff. One actually thinks an enc had a part in it since they had charmed an imp for the giants (Being that soon enough they were right in the area, Ctwoo, maybe?-Many apologies if not). Believe it or not, I really don't care. Sure I could post screenshots and say names of the people sending me tells, but since it isn't all that relevant to the story, I'm not going to throw good dudes under the bus. In fact, I really don't care about the creepers even. I didn't die and I dinged 50 while writing this. No harm no foul, amirite? Gratz Kael.

So right off the bat some clown from ST named Patchet blames Kingdom. Really smooth ST, having your guildies blame another guild when not one member was in the zone. Lame. So far, Kingdom has been super cool on the server and you would think you would want to maintain relations with other raiding guilds. Just sayin, get your shit together.

So this is where the story gets interesting. This Patchet artard just keeps going on and on talking trash. His nonsense is your standard cliche wanna-be troll. Worse yet, he is the type that actually thinks he's getting under your skin and drones on about it. Wow, embarrassing. Packsalunch gets an honorable mention for the only other ST who is a sad sad Lguk farmer who likes to talk trash in tells. Why did I say this now? Because he actually just swung by my group to be stupid; literally while I type this. Is the guy EVER outside lguk let alone away from his computer? No surprise nobody else in the group likes the guy either. (oh and genius, we can see you sitting invis on the priest spawn point in your effort to gank it)

SO back to Pachet, I do what any man would do, I inform him of the obvious, he is only a tough guy behind a computer screen. I tell him that he is just your run of the mill dude that plays a video game and seems to think that makes him important. I try and tell him a 21 year old bootleg game and a raiding guild scoring him +7 crap isn't that impressive to the ladies or prospective employers or ffs other EQ players for that matter.

In all seriousness and in full geek mode, the turd actually starts bragging about his "dragon gear". LOL! Cool story bro! Sigh...

Dude continues, seems to claim he is anything significant outside of pixels. I accurately inform him that his entire being is wrapped up into his EQ identity and that is concerning. You know, the game that for the most part every one of us have leveled dozens of toons on and have decked out with all sorts of raid gear 20 years ago... We have all seen these washed up folks that have "back issues" so they don't work and the only way they can muster any pride in their life is to play a game that rewards little on skill, but mostly rewards just investing copious amounts of time in. It should be for entertainment, not your entire being dude.

The guy reminds me of Tom Hanks in Mazes and Monsters...

So here's the juicy part for ST. When your doucher of a guildie was going on and on about how amazing and tough he is while representing ST (All the other ST were cool short of whoever in fact trained us), I put him to the test. He claimed to be more than just a turd so I told him in all seriousness that we can meet up. I told him to see if his "dragon gear" will protect his teeth from being knocked out.

In standard fashion of one purely pathetic and sad, he asked if I meant a literal physical confrontation to back up his BS. I unequivocally affirmed. He then I guess thought he was calling my bluff and asked for my address... I told him 26359 Shandy Trl, Merrifield, MN 56465; lol I am not intimidated. 45 beautiful acres on a lake which anyone is welcome to sit back and have a beer with me. WTF you gonna do Patchet, order me up a pizza?

I asked for his, he gave me a PO Box... Probably not even a correct PO Box, but it was supposedly in WI. Close enough for me. So Seal Team, one of your guildies proudly representing ST with his guild tag and epic tales of "dragon gear" accepted my challenge. If you guys have any scruples and are as bad ass as your guildie represents IN PUBLIC, SET IT UP. I even told the shitbag I would fly him out here before he said Wisconsin.

If this dude doesn't represent ST, I suggest giving his ass the boot to save face. The vast majority of your guild are chill dudes that don't have inflated egos over a video game... Oh and Patchet, when you asked if it would be "Like a boxing match", it will not be. It will be bare knuckle. As I said, I fully intend to knock your teeth out; Something your worthless parents should have done years ago. Then you will HAVE to only talk trash behind your computer by typing unless you want to gum out your bs in person.

LOL, how do you guys put up with such a turd on a daily basis? Ball is in your court. Is he the coward or is the whole guild? Hey, at least other ST let me know that the /ooc was entertaining. That is pretty bad when they don't even care for the guy. Lol, what a joke. Am I triggered? Nope. Just willing to leisurely do the world a favor. We all hate cowards; especially those that hide. [You must be logged in to view images. Log in or Register.] Again, I am dead serious. Set it up homies or dump the sack of shit. If not, you're all just as pathetic.

Lastly, Patchet literally said in ooc that "I will train you if I see you". Again, challenge accepted-If I see Patchet in a ST raid or anywhere else, I will freely train him and anyone else associated with him. Can't be against "the rules" if he encourages it right? Complain to him about it. You have been duly warned.

Have an incredible day.

P.S. You can see the zone list of all the ST to ask all you want about how everything went down so save the show the "proof"; I'm not all that into logs (I don't even know where they're at or if they're on) and taking endless screenshots when I'm here to play a video game. I don't need to prove anything to pound sense into your guildmate and that's the point of this post. The entire zone saw him demand my address and I gave it. The entire zone saw his threat to train me. We can meet whenever and wherever broski. No threats, just taking a bad ass Seal Team member up on his challenge.
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  #2  
Old 01-26-2020, 03:12 PM
BurtMacklinFBI BurtMacklinFBI is offline
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Posts: 155
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tldr

patchet is a chad tho
  #3  
Old 01-26-2020, 03:13 PM
Phaezed-Reality Phaezed-Reality is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by kaelseren [You must be logged in to view images. Log in or Register.]
it will not be. It will be bare knuckle. As I said, I fully intend to knock your teeth out; Something your worthless parents should have done years ago.
[You must be logged in to view images. Log in or Register.]
  #4  
Old 01-26-2020, 03:18 PM
kaelseren kaelseren is offline
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Join Date: Oct 2014
Posts: 6
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So Packs and I just had a conversation. We are now best buds, so just ignore the part about him. We are cool. It is EQ, we can chalk it up to miscommunication. I can't edit out the part about him, so just consider this a voluntary retraction.
  #5  
Old 01-26-2020, 03:19 PM
Nightbear Nightbear is offline
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Join Date: Dec 2011
Posts: 552
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tldr
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Smac - Iksar Grave Lord
Pulsate - High Elf Phantasmist
Mackenze - Human Warder
Mackaroni <Seal Team> - Human Monk
  #6  
Old 01-26-2020, 03:21 PM
Dildy Dildy is offline
Sarnak


Join Date: Aug 2014
Posts: 241
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That de-escalated quickly
  #7  
Old 01-26-2020, 03:25 PM
Ratchet51 Ratchet51 is offline
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Location: Felwithe Bitch
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Am I gonna have to choke a bitch?
__________________
Ratchet 60 High Elf Paladin <Definitely Not AM>because f**k you, that's why. (Retired)
[Name Redacted] 60 High Elf Cleric <[Guild Redacted]> of the Green server. (Active)
P99 Green Test of Tactics Champion 2022
Quote:
Originally Posted by Rudy View Post
You are #1 most toxic.
  #8  
Old 01-26-2020, 03:26 PM
Evia Evia is offline
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Location: USA
Posts: 2,122
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TLDR. Got halfway through and had to reevaluate my life choices
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Kellian Cove (60 Wood Elf Rogue)
Parra Doxx (55 Barbarian Shaman)

“This man is using his mind as a weapon …and woe be tide the creature who
steps into his garden" -Finch

  #9  
Old 01-26-2020, 03:27 PM
sedrie.bellamie sedrie.bellamie is offline
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Join Date: May 2011
Posts: 246
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Quote:
Originally Posted by kaelseren [You must be logged in to view images. Log in or Register.]
So Packs and I just had a conversation. We are now best buds, so just ignore the part about him. We are cool. It is EQ, we can chalk it up to miscommunication. I can't edit out the part about him, so just consider this a voluntary retraction.
pussy
  #10  
Old 01-26-2020, 03:37 PM
kaelseren kaelseren is offline
Large Rat


Join Date: Oct 2014
Posts: 6
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Quote:
Originally Posted by sedrie.bellamie [You must be logged in to view images. Log in or Register.]
pussy
His part in the story was inconsequential to patches or whatever his name is. Not sure how I am the pussy... But ok, you have your opinion.
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