Dating thread

[Duik]

Ugg. Me independant man. Must conform to what other men think a man is. Ugg.

I'd so go on a self date but when asked I'd say "Some twat/bitch told me to go fuck myself" so I decided to see how easy I was.
Like a self test.
Don't wanna act too slutty, especially on a first date.

Give yaself a break guys.

[shovelquest]

I lived in a world where men said what men were and where boy and girls said what men were and tbh I prefer the former, and I like bards and elfs.

[Lune]

[Jimjam]

First impression: disappointment. Ngl. Thought the thread was gonna be about something cool like archaeology or palaeontology. Radiocarbon dating and stuff. Nevermind.

Thread did deliver some entertainment. Lol going somewhere by yourself is now ‘selfdating’? Imagine being so insecure that you can’t go somewhere alone without turning it into a whole big thing. Still, good for them to reframe it into something they can engage with positively instead of being bored and lonely.

I’m just being catty cos I’ve been a bit under the weather for the past few days. Starting to feel a bit better, but yea sorry for any recent grumpposting.

Re solo activities I quite enjoy packing a small back pack with some dehydrated drinks and foods, a thermos of hot water and just seeing where my bike takes me. Always pack some waterproofs and warms too just in case. There are usually decent spots off the waterways for an impromptu picnic.

Social ‘dates’, i’ve joined a warhammer campaign so we meet up at the warhammer hq monthly. Always a good time there. Dnd online weekly.

Romantic dates monday night pub and Thursday day trips with the wife. I skipped yesterday cos I needed the rest. Hope to be well enough for a day out this week though!

Probably valentines will be at home as we’ll go out on Thursday.

What yall cooking up for Cupid?

[NopeNopeNopeNope]

Originally Posted by Duik [You must be logged in to view images. Log in or Register.]

Ugg. Me independant man. Must conform to what other men think a man is. Ugg.

I'd so go on a self date but when asked I'd say "Some twat/bitch told me to go fuck myself" so I decided to see how easy I was.

Well see THAT I would have sympathy for (being stood up). Even if the dude said “look I’ve never been on a date in my life so I’m doing a dry run here to try to practice some things I might want to say or do on a date”

I’d think ok that’s weird as shit but it almost makes sense. Probably better to try to pay your sister or something to role play your “date” in that scenario though so at least you would have a human reaction to gauge

But yea, sorry not sorry it’s pathetic (to me) for a dude to claim to be on a date with themselves and it’s more understandable self care when a woman does. Men and women are different, always were, always will be /shrug

[NopeNopeNopeNope]

Originally Posted by Jimjam [You must be logged in to view images. Log in or Register.]

First impression: disappointment. Ngl. Thought the thread was gonna be about something cool like archaeology or palaeontology. Radiocarbon dating and stuff. Nevermind.

Thread did deliver some entertainment. Lol going somewhere by yourself is now ‘selfdating’? Imagine being so insecure that you can’t go somewhere alone without turning it into a whole big thing. Still, good for them to reframe it into something they can engage with positively instead of being bored and lonely.

I’m just being catty cos I’ve been a bit under the weather for the past few days. Starting to feel a bit better, but yea sorry for any recent grumpposting.

Re solo activities I quite enjoy packing a small back pack with some dehydrated drinks and foods, a thermos of hot water and just seeing where my bike takes me. Always pack some waterproofs and warms too just in case. There are usually decent spots off the waterways for an impromptu picnic.

Social ‘dates’, i’ve joined a warhammer campaign so we meet up at the warhammer hq monthly. Always a good time there. Dnd online weekly.

Romantic dates monday night pub and Thursday day trips with the wife. I skipped yesterday cos I needed the rest. Hope to be well enough for a day out this week though!

Probably valentines will be at home as we’ll go out on Thursday.

What yall cooking up for Cupid?

Your solo activities sound like a damn good time [You must be logged in to view images. Log in or Register.]

I think the problem with a thread like this being dead is that too many men, including men here, have decided to throw in the towel for possibly the rest of their damn lives when it comes to the idea of a romantic relationship with another human. Not saying marriage, btw, not saying kids. Just some form of romance, even if it’s brief. Or anything more too

Now can that be done in a fulfilling way? Sure! It’s not as easy or as fulfilling I think as people might claim, but I can’t jump inside their heads to confirm. I do know we are very good at being like:

[You must be logged in to view images. Log in or Register.]

About our decisions, Lol

So I’m at work and can’t expand on this but I don’t think that kind of life will be as fulfilling as they think it will. Nor do I find any of the reasons I’ve heard for doing so compelling

[Botten]

Originally Posted by NopeNopeNopeNope [You must be logged in to view images. Log in or Register.]

I think the problem with a thread like this being dead is that too many men, including men here, have decided to throw in the towel for possibly the rest of their damn lives when it comes to the idea of a romantic relationship with another human. Not saying marriage, btw, not saying kids. Just some form of romance, even if it’s brief. Or anything more too..

You know NopeNopeNope you may not know this but you are probably still looking in the sense of the traditional American way to find romance.

You are the right combination of success, personality and ethnicity to get what you want.

Seriously take a trip to the Philippine, Thailand or Japan. Be mindful of those that will fawn for you there. There will be a lot.

But if you can weed through the sheer number of those girls looking for love their you can find one that will have the eastern mentality. The mentality of devotion and belief in family. Just be careful thou this culture easily gets home sick (so expect many visits... for her).

And even if you weren't looking for romance do you know the sheer number of American men that have fathered children over in the Philippines and have little to no interaction with their kids? It is crazy.

Now I was part of an arranged marriage which I wholeheartedly believe in as I now reach my 10 year.

But I think you are missing out. Just again be careful.

In this day I can't believe when a man in West says it is impossible to find commitment.
Believe me there is no reason why you must limit yourself to Western beliefs (unless you are very religious).

There are a lot of woman looking.

[loramin]

Originally Posted by NopeNopeNopeNope [You must be logged in to view images. Log in or Register.]

I think the problem with a thread like this being dead is that too many men, including men here, have decided to throw in the towel for possibly the rest of their damn lives when it comes to the idea of a romantic relationship with another human. Not saying marriage, btw, not saying kids. Just some form of romance, even if it’s brief. Or anything more too

...

So I’m at work and can’t expand on this but I don’t think that kind of life will be as fulfilling as they think it will. Nor do I find any of the reasons I’ve heard for doing so compelling

Many nerds (EQ nerds, D&D nerds, Warhammer nerds, etc.) have social and/or mental issues, myself included. That shit can make you fail at relationships more than most people, which then can make you not want to even try ... but I think it's more that, not that people really want to be alone.

Personally, I consider myself very lucky: I have some personal shit, but I still managed to meet, date, and marry the love of my life (who loves the real/flawed me ... and is also pretty hot [You must be logged in to view images. Log in or Register.]).

My advice to any "nerds with baggage" is that you have to think of it as a numbers game. Yeah, maybe that cute coffee shop girl you ask out will say no. Maybe the next ten or twenty will ... but eventually you're going to see "You have gotten better at hitting on women (2)", and also eventually one of them will say yes.

Again, the one that says yes probably won't be the "love you for life despite all your flaws" match. But if you date her, fail, and go date some more people, eventually you'll get better at both entering and staying in a relationship, and ultimately you'll find companionship. You just have to grind out those skill increases!

[Ekco]

Originally Posted by loramin [You must be logged in to view images. Log in or Register.]

which then can make you not want to even try ... but I think it's more that, not that people really want to be alone.

for the majority of nerds, 100%. idk the % but i have Counterdependency issues and dating someone who is codependent is legit dangerous, so even playing the numbers game isn't worth it due to the amount of single women who are codependent

some people really are better off alone.

[NopeNopeNopeNope]

Originally Posted by loramin [You must be logged in to view images. Log in or Register.]

Many nerds (EQ nerds, D&D nerds, Warhammer nerds, etc.) have social and/or mental issues, myself included. That shit can make you fail at relationships more than most people, which then can make you not want to even try ... but I think it's more that, not that people really want to be alone.

Personally, I consider myself very lucky: I have some personal shit, but I still managed to meet, date, and marry the love of my life (who loves the real/flawed me ... and is also pretty hot [You must be logged in to view images. Log in or Register.]).

My advice to any "nerds with baggage" is that you have to think of it as a numbers game. Yeah, maybe that cute coffee shop girl you ask out will say no. Maybe the next ten or twenty will ... but eventually you're going to see "You have gotten better at hitting on women (2)", and also eventually one of them will say yes.

Again, the one that says yes probably won't be the "love you for life despite all your flaws" match. But if you date her, fail, and go date some more people, eventually you'll get better at both entering and staying in a relationship, and ultimately you'll find companionship. You just have to grind out those skill increases!

Well said, sir. And good on you to offer yourself as an example

Yea when I hear things like “I have this mental issue and have decided to arrange my entire life around it” I’m always frustrated because some of these issues are possible to if not get over, than to at least mitigate somewhat, through various methods

But some people try a few things, claim they’ve “tried everything” and then design their entire life around avoiding their issues

A good analogy is the DnD scenario with the treasure and the dragon. The reason those fantasy stories are compelling is that it’s not just some pile of the treasure in a cave. The main character has to face the most difficult and terrifying thing they’ve ever faced, a freaking dragon, in order to get that treasure. The dragon being an effective metaphor for one’s issues and insecurities holding them back

There’s an old quote I like that says something like “that which you want most will be found where you least want to look”