When you're healing

[wulfenger]

Don't put up with people complaining about not getting a buff when the first time they asked they were out of range.

Don't put up with someone complaining about not getting a heal when they are not pulling in range of the heal.

Don't get bullied. If you're worried about getting kicked from groups if you defend yourself, understand that you are going to run into people with some internal issues and it's not the end of the world.

[loramin]

I think the basic idea of having thick skin and not letting someone else ruin your fun is an excellent one. However, I also think you'll catch more bees with honey than with vinegar, ie. you'll be more successful dealing with everyone you meet on P99 if you assume the best about them rather than the worst.

That person who was out of range of the buff/heal? They probably didn't mean to be out of range, and it's likely they didn't even know that they were. Heck, non-casters may not even think about the fact that casters have a spell range, because it's not something they've ever experienced.

So, I'm not saying you should let anyone be rude to you, but if you respond with "sorry, I couldn't buff/heal you because you were out of range; please try to stay close when you expect a buff/heal" you'll get kicked from groups for defending yourself a lot less than if you respond with "screw you! I'm doing my job just fine, you're the screw-up" [You must be logged in to view images. Log in or Register.]

[wulfenger]

Originally Posted by loramin [You must be logged in to view images. Log in or Register.]

I think the basic idea of having thick skin and not letting someone else ruin your fun is an excellent one. However, I also think you'll catch more bees with honey than with vinegar, ie. you'll be more successful dealing with everyone you meet on P99 if you assume the best about them rather than the worst.

That person who was out of range of the buff/heal? They probably didn't mean to be out of range, and it's likely they didn't even know that they were. Heck, non-casters may not even think about the fact that casters have a spell range, because it's not something they've ever experienced.

So, I'm not saying you should let anyone be rude to you, but if you respond with "sorry, I couldn't buff/heal you because you were out of range; please try to stay close when you expect a buff/heal" instead of "screw you I'm doing my job just fine, you're the screw-up" you'll get kicked from groups for defending yourself a lot less [You must be logged in to view images. Log in or Register.]

The ladder comment is something I don't concern myself with. I give my reasoning and if the flame continues then I just say you won't get it if you continue being aggressive towards me. It's a legitimate situation and not everyone has the capacity to calm down. Thank you for the generalization though. I can tell you've had a couple situations that didn't go your way.

[loramin]

Originally Posted by wulfenger [You must be logged in to view images. Log in or Register.]

Thank you for the generalization though. I can tell you've had a couple situations that didn't go your way.

Heh, this server attracts some interesting folks from time to time.

Originally Posted by wulfenger [You must be logged in to view images. Log in or Register.]

The ladder comment is something I don't concern myself with. I give my reasoning and if the flame continues then I just say you won't get it if you continue being aggressive towards me. It's a legitimate situation and not everyone has the capacity to calm down.

If someone continues to be a dick then absolutely, stop grouping with them, tell them to fuck off, or whatever.

All I'm saying is that, as long as you're dealing with someone who there's still hope for, and as long as you want to prioritize getting the response you want, then you should de-prioritize getting to respond the way you want. If you respond in a way that's the opposite of how their behavior is making you want to respond it will result in better outcomes for you (like more XP because your group stays together longer), even if it hurts to be nice to someone who's not being nice to you.

But then of course there are other things to care about besides just keeping your group together.

[wulfenger]

Originally Posted by loramin [You must be logged in to view images. Log in or Register.]

Heh, this server attracts some interesting folks from time to time.



If someone continues to be a dick then absolutely, stop grouping with them, tell them to fuck off, or whatever.

All I'm saying is that, as long as you're dealing with someone who there's still hope for, and as long as you want to prioritize getting the response you want, then you should de-prioritize getting to respond the way you want. If you respond in a way that's the opposite of how their behavior is making you want to respond it will result in better outcomes for you (like more XP because your group stays together longer), even if it hurts to be nice to someone who's not being nice to you.

But then of course there are other things to care about besides just keeping your group together.

I think you like to tell yourself you're a good person, but it's really not true at all. I reject your post and your attempt at "agreeing with me" for the sake of me agreeing with you.

[Lhancelot]

Originally Posted by wulfenger [You must be logged in to view images. Log in or Register.]

Don't put up with people complaining about not getting a buff when the first time they asked they were out of range.

Don't put up with someone complaining about not getting a heal when they are not pulling in range of the heal.

Don't get bullied. If you're worried about getting kicked from groups if you defend yourself, understand that you are going to run into people with some internal issues and it's not the end of the world.

I didn't know it was hard to wait for someone to be in a range and then buff them. Is that too much to expect from you almighty healer?

Pullers often have to fetch mobs from places much further than heal range, so if this is the case they should not expect a heal?

Healers aren't the only ones bullied...

Your advice to healers while perhaps well intentioned comes off poorly and sounds very self-entitled.

On a side note, I have never seen a healer bullied, in fact usually healers are granted more patience than other classes.

[wulfenger]

Originally Posted by Lhancelot [You must be logged in to view images. Log in or Register.]

I didn't know it was hard to wait for someone to be in a range and then buff them. Is that too much to expect from you almighty healer?

Pullers often have to fetch mobs from places much further than heal range, so if this is the case they should not expect a heal?

Healers aren't the only ones bullied...

Your advice to healers while perhaps well intentioned comes off poorly and sounds very self-entitled.

On a side note, I have never seen a healer bullied, in fact usually healers are granted more patience than other classes.

1. It's not hard to wait for them. I didn't say that at all. In fact you made up that statement from nothing.

2. In my situation, pulling for example with 70% health and then fighting it across the yard and then complains about why they aren't getting heals while I'm mashing the heal button and trying to get in range of them is not a kind thing to do at all.

3. My post wasn't intended to flame. It was intended for healers to have some self-respect and not bend to the will of abuse.

The only point I'm getting from your posts is "How dare you suggest that people stand up to me?"

The other suggestion I'm receiving is that people would get it after a quick math lesson. It's not a totally unachievable concept to understand why people would think that would work every time. I get it. But what if I don't feel like it? That's reasonable too.

If you want me to accept your opinions, they need to be absent of lies, generalizations, and assumptions based on prejudice.

[loramin]

Originally Posted by wulfenger [You must be logged in to view images. Log in or Register.]

I didn't say that at all. In fact you made up that statement from nothing.

Originally Posted by wulfenger [You must be logged in to view images. Log in or Register.]

I think you like to tell yourself you're a good person, but it's really not true at all. I reject your post and your attempt at "agreeing with me" for the sake of me agreeing with you.

Wow, pot calling the kettle black much? There was nothing in my post about "agreeing with you" for the sake of you agreeing with me, or about being a good person, let alone me telling myself that I was one.

On the contrary, my advice had absolutely nothing to do with being good to anyone: it was 100% applicable to a completely selfish/self-centered healer.

What you seem to have a hard time grasping is that satisfying your immediate desire for gratification can make it harder to benefit yourself (your selfish self) in the long term. When you act like an asshole to someone in the game, deserved or not (that's completely irrelevant) you feel good for 5 seconds. "Yeah, I told the puller off, what a jerk he was!"

... and then you get kicked out of the group. Then maybe in the future you'll be looking for a group and not get an invite because the group includes that same puller, or maybe one of their alts you've never met, or maybe someone else from the group that kicked you. So you got to satisfy your immediate need for gratification, but you screwed yourself out of the experience you would have got from staying in the group, and potentially you've screwed yourself out of XP you never even knew you could have gotten. And that doesn't even address other negative side effects, like that the people you piss off might charge you more in the EC Tunnel, or vote against your future guild application.

OR you can hold your tongue, speak respectfully to everyone whether or not they deserve it, and stay in the group. You get to keep getting XP, and as for the future ... well I've certainly never heard anyone say "that guy was really nice to an asshole: let's not invite him because of it".

Again, none of this has anything to with being a "good person". In fact, most people would describe what I'm talking about as being "two-faced", not good. But if you still can't grasp the concept that acting like a jerk hurts you (and no one else) in the long run, then by all means keep acting the same.

[wulfenger]

Originally Posted by RDawg816 [You must be logged in to view images. Log in or Register.]

Your post and your attitude tell me this should have been posted in RnF.

I levelled up my shaman as the only healer, slower, CC in 99% of my groups. If people asked for buffs I didn't feel they needed I would tell them no. If they were out of range I'd move or buff them when they came back. If people had a problem with this they could leave the group (no one ever did though...)

I have seen people "bullied" and/or kicked from groups. It was always a unanimous decision to kick and always after 20+ minutes of explaining in group chat what they were doing wrong. If you're getting "bullied" it might be warranted. Alternatively, you could just group with jerks.... Based on your posts I can only imagine you're super fun to have in a group!

Originally Posted by loramin [You must be logged in to view images. Log in or Register.]

Wow, pot calling the kettle black much? There was nothing in my post about "agreeing with you" for the sake of you agreeing with me, or about being a good person, let alone me telling myself that I was one.

On the contrary, my advice had absolutely nothing to do with being good to anyone: it was 100% applicable to a completely selfish/self-centered healer.

What you seem to have a hard time grasping is that satisfying your immediate desire for gratification can make it harder to benefit yourself (your selfish self) in the long term. When you act like an asshole to someone in the game, deserved or not (that's completely irrelevant) you feel good for 5 seconds. "Yeah, I told the puller off, what a jerk he was!"

... and then you get kicked out of the group. Then maybe in the future you'll be looking for a group and not get an invite because the group includes that same puller, or maybe one of their alts you've never met, or maybe someone else from the group that kicked you. So you got to satisfy your immediate need for gratification, but you screwed yourself out of the experience you would have got from staying in the group, and potentially you've screwed yourself out of XP you never even knew you could have gotten. And that doesn't even address other negative side effects, like that the people you piss off might charge you more in the EC Tunnel, or vote against your future guild application.

OR you can hold your tongue, speak respectfully to everyone whether or not they deserve it, and stay in the group. You get to keep getting XP, and as for the future ... well I've certainly never heard anyone say "that guy was really nice to an asshole: let's not invite him because of it".

Again, none of this has anything to with being a "good person". In fact, most people would describe what I'm talking about as being "two-faced", not good. But if you still can't grasp the concept that acting like a jerk hurts you (and no one else) in the long run, then by all means keep acting the same.

I've grown accustomed to your posts being long and pointless. TLDR; sorry.

[Troxx]

As a shaman in the low to mid 50s the hardest groups were always when I found myself as the only priest in the absence of an enchanter to both handle the haste and assist with crowd control. Holding down all the healing, slowing, and buffs for a full group was hell.

Just state expectations up front and let them know your priorities. For me those priorities were in the following order:
-cheap (not Turgurs) slow on every mob
-emergency heal
-chloro/regrowth on ever person taking damage (most efficient heal)
-standard top off heal
-sow to puller
-haste to melee
-str to melee
-everything else, and only if mana was sustainable

If the group had a problem with that, I'd give them a quick math lesson and explain how they can't expect a solo shaman to maintain chain pulls and do half the jobs in the group. Slows come before heals, heals come before buffs, and non-critical buffs should not be expected.