The Sneaksy Gnome (Adventure!)

[Ivory]

I keep hearing people say being a rogue is a hard life....that they can't solo....and that you gotta twink them.

My theory is these people didn't pick the right race! Obviously a gnome is the only one clever enough to survive as a non-twink rogue!!

And so....it is my goal to prove that a rogue can rogue without a fancy group or without batman like wealth!

((Rules are no twinking or powerleveling! Small gifts and passerby buffs are ok though. Also, mostly I'll probably solo....I like to solo since I tend to AFK a lot while workins))

.

The Beginnening

There once was a gnome that had lived in the safety of Ak'anon her entire life....but she always dreamed of adventure outside of the city! She didn't know magic...and she wasn't enough that tough....so people said it was impossible, that she was too weak, with only 65 strength there was no hope!

So she never tried to leave....listening to the other gnomes and only played in the city, eventually gaining the nickname "Sneaksy" for her habit of eavesdropping on adventurers that would come into the city.

http://i.imgur.com/prmOHPm.png

That was, until one day an erudite merchant came into town selling magic items!

One of the items was a crystal he said could turn anyone into a great adventurer, even a little gnome! But it was expensive.... costing 1,000,000 platinum!

Though Sneaksy didn't have even 1 platinum....she had to have it!

She knew not many gnomes were so rich, but there was one gnome with plenty of money, a weird old gnome named Welno Tanboots. She had found his treasure room one day while exploring, and even knew where the key was!

So, she decided to borrow the money. Obviously once she used the crystal she would be a great adventurer and plenty rich to pay him back. It was a foolproof plan!

The next day the erudite left the city....1 million platinum richer....and Sneaksy had her crystal!

For the following week she slept with it under her pillow as instructed...but she didn't feel any different....

That night, she went to her crystal hiding spot to get it again for her pillow when she discovered it was gone!!! And in its place was a note....

http://i.imgur.com/RDRC2Mv.png

Welno was onto her!! He had found out his money was missing before she became a great adventurer!!

.

Day 1

I was pretty nervous going to see Welno! I wondered what he would have me do.....maybe even...make me clean floors?! Whatever it was I was sure it was going to be boring!

http://i.imgur.com/fR5TmHq.png

"You owe me quite a lot of money Sneaksy....not many people can steal from the leader of the gnome rogues!

You have some natural talent... so, from now on I'll help you refine your skills....and you will work for us."

And with that...I was recruited!!! He then gave me a tunic for protection and send me out into the Steamfont mountains to practice gnoming. It was time for adventure!

I hadn't been out to the Steamfont mountains much. But I was pretty sure the kobolds had all the treasure. So I figured they would be the best things to fight.

http://i.imgur.com/Rdd8TCm.png

The first kobold I fought wasn't so hard. It looked like this would be easier then I thought.

So next up, I tried to fight a gnome skeleton! I figured it would go pretty well, after-all, I'm part skeleton too!

But as I tried to fight one.....suddenly I was ambushed by 3 others!!!!

http://i.imgur.com/GkGYDBj.png

I ran as fast as I could back towards Ak'anon.....but as I got close....one of the skeletons knocked me unconscious!

http://i.imgur.com/RKYFfJJ.png

It was only for a moment though, and I quickly regained consciousness....I knew if I didn't move fast, another hit and I would be done for!

"Save me save me save me!" I yelled as I ran down the path.

Luckily one of the watchmen was nearby! And he came running to fight off the skeletons.

http://i.imgur.com/yVWeT6z.png

"Sneaksy....what are you doing out here? Go back inside..."

"What are you talking about?! Didn't you hear? I'm an adventurer now! And for the record, I was just about to beat those skeletons up! I was lulling them into a false sense of security!".

"....."

I couldn't let Watchman Dreeb keep showing me up.... I had to get stronger....this shirt just wasn't enough to keep me safe from skeletons!

So I decided to leave the mountains and travel to the wood elf city of Kelethin to search for better armor. I had heard there were a lot of tailors in the city, maybe one could make me some armor? I didn't have much money, but maybe I could "borrow" some from the elves!

........

Getting to the city wasn't so hard. When I got there I helped the guards fight off some bats and bigger skeletons and some wolves. I was getting pretty good at this adventuring thing -flex-

http://i.imgur.com/jzdENUe.png

I also figured I would need lots of wolf pets to get some good armor made. So I tried to focus on them.....and after getting a few I went up into the city and talked to some tailors. They were all pretty busy with their own things....but they had plenty of patterns. Maybe I could make my own armor?

The problem was I was pretty poor....

But I had enough money to at least buy a sewing kit and try to make one or two things. I also noticed the merchants had lots of extra wolf skins for sale! I could have saved myself so much trouble!!

After a few tries I managed to make myself a piece of armor. The merchant seemed pretty impressed with my sewing too! He offered me over a gold for it!!!

Hummm, I needed armor....but also needed money.....

Then it struck me! I could make armor for all of the elves!! If I bought cheap wolf skins and patterns and sewed them together....I could still make a profit selling it to the merchant!!

So I got to work! And after a while I had done it! I had earned enough money to make myself a fancy set of patchwork armor!!!

http://i.imgur.com/03NrMPu.png

Problem was I had used up most of my money again to make it all.

So, I started to sit around thinking of what to do, next. I guess I needed a better weapon. I had seen some tailor patterns for whips, but they were so expensive...and needed to know how to brew too..... I definitely didn't have enough money for all of that....

That's when I met another skeleton just sitting in the city! This one seemed a lot nicer than the ones in the steamfont mountains at least....

http://i.imgur.com/49rqr5O.png

He also seemed to have pretty fancy things for a skeleton!! I bet he had money too! I knew just what to do!!!

"Hay...skeleton. I bet you want to buy some bone-chips don't you? I know skeletons like bones. I got 20 of them!"

"Wow, bone chips? Yes! I will buy them!!" The skeleton seemed pretty excited!

And with that, I traded my bone chips to the skeleton and suddenly had 20pp!!!! I was rich!!!! With this much money maybe I could learn brewing after all! And make myself a whip!

[Baler]

Actually an enjoyable little story. I'd like to read more of Sneaksy the gnome rogue. :)

"What are you talking about?! Didn't you hear? I'm an adventurer now!

[Bummey]

I'm looking forward to hearing about your trip out West!

[Jimjam]

Ivory, for all this talk of needing twinking, how fungi monks are the best melee and other forumgroupthink on how to play p1999...


Let me say, YOU are the only one who is playing the game properly!

[Ivory]

As I was looking around the elf city more....I kept noticing guards sleeping. I figured their shields were probably uncomfortable while napping, so I borrowed them!

http://i.imgur.com/X15laEP.png

I ..uhm....tried to look for the guards to return their shields later....but when I couldn't find them, I turned the shields into a nearby merchant for a finders fee! I made a few more platinum though! Elves really appreciate their shields being found! I'm really helpful.

But I couldn't get distracted! I was on a mission! I had to learn brewing so I could make myself a fancy weapon!

Only problem was Kelethin doesn't have a good place to learn brewing...so I had to go back to Ak'anon for a little bit to study it. All of the gnomes in the city I knew were pretty impressed by all of my fancy armor. I kept telling them I was on secret gnome adventuring business....but they didn't believe me. Oh well!

I spent all my money learning to brew just enough to get the parts for a whip....enough for two tries!

The first one failed....I wasn't sure what I would do if the second one failed too!! I was nervous to try and make it!

But I steadied myself and started sewing....and a few minutes later....I had done it!! I had made a whip!!

http://i.imgur.com/zOQliGq.png

http://i.imgur.com/4AtUviY.png

With this I could go back to adventuring! Even stronger than before!!!

So I stuck around the city and joined the elves in their war against the orcs for a while. An elf even cast some magic on me so I was pretty strong.

But....after a while....I started to hear rumors about a great bazaar. My whip was pretty good, of course! But I really wanted a mighty dagger.... I had saved up an entire 20pp again....maybe , just maybe, I could find something even stronger there? Or, at least find some adventure!

So, I left Kelethin and went to Butcherblock mountains to take the boat to freeport!

But, as I was passing through the mountains, I noticed a druid...hmmm....even better!! And away we went!!

http://i.imgur.com/LUC7zp5.png

When I got to the common lands... I had to find the bazaar...it was actually pretty easy to find with all of the traffic! It seemed there were probably over ten thousand people there!!

http://i.imgur.com/Iu3pVWb.png

I walked around for a while....looking out for something that I could afford....and something that looked pokey.

Then I heard over all the shouting someone selling a dagger for 40pp!! It was double the amount I had!!

Hmm, but it was a pretty good dagger.....it was time to use my gnomish haggling skills. I would start off with all my money!!!

"Would you take...22pp for that dagger?! If you think about it, the dagger for a gnome is a lot smaller than a full sized dagger...so it should cost less...."

"Ok, I'll take 20pp"

Woa! It had worked!! On the first try!! And he didn't even hear me right!! He thought I said only 20pp!! I had a 2pp savings!!

I guess it was time to retire my whip. I wished I woulda thought of coming here sooner! I had spent so much time and money making it!! But oh well! Now I had....a jagged chokidai spine! I wonder what a chokidai is....

http://i.imgur.com/XpvwEAC.png

I was pretty proud of myself. This dagger was probably one of the best daggers in the world!

So I took some time to look around the bazaar some more...even though I was out of money.

That is when I met the swashbuckler....

http://i.imgur.com/c3Mp5LC.png

"Psst....gnome....if you want to be a great adventurer....you gotta learn how to bandage wounds."

I wasn't sure how he knew I was going to be a great adventurer....or how he knew I hadn't tried bandaging wounds before, since I was too poor to afford bandages. But he was right!! If I was going to be a great adventurer, I had to learn!!!

Luckily I found a magician nearby who summoned me a bunch of bandages to practice with!

http://i.imgur.com/MWEGO6w.png

So, for the next long while, I practiced not only bandaging wounds....but also jumping from things to hurt myself! I'm happy to say I'm pretty good at both things now.

After all of that, I finally went to Freeport to rest and meet up with another gnome from Ak'anon. I knew I could stay there for the night at least. And he had a pretty good business going!! Maybe if this adventuring thing didn't work out I could sell drinks too!

http://i.imgur.com/tSrtfxt.png

[Varren]

/subscribe

[Ivory]

The next day when I woke up I went back to the bazaar while thinking of what to do next. But, before I could think of something, a human came running through the bazaar being chased by a monster!

I sprung into action and used my fancy new dagger to save him!! At least at first....then the monster turned on me!!! I was still only level 6, so this was a slight problem.

Lucky for me there were others around who followed my lead and joined in the battle. In the end, we defeated it and saved everyone there from its rampage!

http://i.imgur.com/1HTURSs.png

An ogre in the bazaar was so impressed he let me try on his fancy armor!!!

I was worried it wouldn't fit me at first, but it worked out ok! If the gnomes could see me now, they would never believe it!!!

http://i.imgur.com/CoYCoe8.png

I ran around wearing the armor for a little bit. I could tell the ogre seemed pretty nervous that I would scratch it or something.... but I still managed to find the barbarian graveyard!

http://i.imgur.com/CQj2pyS.png

After that...I gave the armor back and was back to thinking of what to do....

The magician I met the day before had given me some bandage buying money for real bandages....but I had heard about an even better armor than patchwork I was curious about. It was studded armor! One of the best armors!

But to make that, I would have to learn smithing....and I heard that was pretty expensive.

As I went around Freeport trying to find out just how expensive smithing was, I noticed some more sleeping guards. First elves, now humans?! Gnome guards never slept on the job!!

The human guards looked pretty uncomfortable with their hats on though....so....I borrowed those too! I could only find a few, but I was sure I could turn them in for a finders fee!!

Didn't take long to find out who wanted them at least.

http://i.imgur.com/FpaDOmO.png

After that I discovered where the forges were....and whew, I was right, smithing was really expensive! I spent almost the rest of my money making some metal bits!

As I was looking around Freeport for a file mold to turn them into studs for the new armor....I noticed a wood elf working at another forge!

http://i.imgur.com/uNZc2Du.png

I was pretty unsure about trying to turn the metal bits into studs myself, I was sure I would lose most of the parts and only make a few myself....I wondered if maybe the wood elf could do it instead?

I asked him how good he was at smithing and it turned out he had been doing it a lot longer than I had! So I gave him my metal bits and the file to make the studs! Better him than me!

http://i.imgur.com/TiLP1D4.png

After talking to him some more it turned out he also knew how to sew!!!! Sewing studded armor is a lot harder than patchwork armor ....maybe he could put the things together for me too! This was going a lot faster than I had thought!!! Originally I imagined I would only be able to make a couple pieces...but, now I had hope of getting an entire set of the fanciest armor!

He said he would be happy to, but I needed to find some good quality wolf hides first.

That's when I remembered the tailors in Kelethin and all of their wolf skins for sale! I told him to wait there and ran out to find another druid! I was in a hurry! I had to get the pelts and bring them back before he went to sleep!!

It didn't take too long to find a druid, and before I knew it I had bags full of good hides!!

http://i.imgur.com/6BvWgas.png

Then I ran back to meet Treelord in Freeport to finish the armor.

http://i.imgur.com/lXbiEpM.png

I was tired from all of the running I had been doing....so while he sewed them together, I went upstairs and found a gnome sized bed to take a nap on. I guess lots of gnomes come to Freeport, they seemed to have a lot of gnome beds!

http://i.imgur.com/j3Rr1ca.png

When I woke up, Treelord had already finished and left the armor for me and even a fancy hand made bag!!

After a little bit of hunting I reached level 7....and studied how to pick pockets....

Now I was prepared....prepared for real adventure!!! Armor, picking pockets, a dagger....I was going to be rich! I just had to find something with lots of treasure!!

[Ivory]

Today was the day I set out to look for adventure!

I was ready!

My plan was to find giants and dragons and pick their pockets to get treasure! Then, I would be rich!

I had heard rumors of giants and dragons from adventurers...that they lived in the ice lands of Velious!

So, that was where I was going to go!

It didn't take too long till I found a druid that could teleport and told him where I wanted to go....but when he teleported us....before I realized what had happened, he had teleported me back home to Steamfont Mountains again!!!!!! I'd been gnome-napped!

"I'm not taking you to die. You are safer here. This is for your own good."

"No! I'm going on an adventure! You don't understand!!"

But he wouldn't listen!

As I argued with him to take me back, another druid appeared.

"Help! This druid kidnapped me with his magic!! I'm supposed to go to velious!!".

The other druid seemed a little confused.... also telling me it was dangerous. Apparently they both didn't realize my armor was studded....and didn't see the extra dangerous dagger I had....

But after a little convincing, the other druid agreed to take me where the first druid refused!

http://i.imgur.com/YhqfNWv.png

Before we left I went and bought a parrying dagger just in case, and some throwing knives..... I had to be prepared.

Then, in a puff of magic, we were gone....and soon in the icy lands of Velious!

http://i.imgur.com/B4GHn3R.png

I'd gotten some maps to the giant city, so had a good idea which way to go for adventure. As I was running though, I noticed the rabbits seemed like good hunting....but figured I would leave them alone, since everything else around them seemed like trouble.

Eventually I made it to the giant city...just as the moon was setting.

http://i.imgur.com/BhhZTrh.png

The problem was, once I got to the giant city...there was no one else around! Everyone was sleeping I guess....just an ogre...and a warrior....

I picked a few giants pockets, and helped the warrior fight some giants.... but it definitely wasn't what I was expecting. If I was going to pick lots of monsters pockets and get rich, I needed distractions!

As the couple of us were sitting around at the entrance of the giant city...suddenly they started talking about needing to leave to kill something big. A dragon?!

I wasn't going to let them go without me!

It didn't take too much convincing even, and they invited me to join them!

This was a little easier than I thought....but I wasn't gonna question it.....then before long...a druid showed up and teleported us all away.

http://i.imgur.com/7q1Q31G.png

Eventually we came to a giant pit in some city....and the druid told us to jump. The warrior didn't seem so sure about it....and I was fairly sure this was a trap.

http://i.imgur.com/Y0lnneT.png

But the warrior was too scared to jump first....I knew if we were going to make it, I had to lead!! Gnomes are braver than barbarians you know! So I jumped in!!

But, I was right, it was a trap!! And within moments I woke up as a ghost in the giants city! But then moments later I was awakened back to my body!! Things were getting crazy!!

There were lots of other adventurers there too. I guess this was all part of their plan....

http://i.imgur.com/XvQDw1B.png

As they looked me over a little bit, somehow they started to realize I hadn't fought a dragon before!!!! I'm not sure how, my studded armor and dagger was as good as any adventurer had!

http://i.imgur.com/Qdh0SN4.png

But it was too late now....we had a dragon to kill!!!!

http://i.imgur.com/SEwug3k.png

Sadly, when I looked around the corner, it wasn't a dragon at all....just....a giant rock elemental! I'm not sure if that is more dangerous than a dragon....I doubt it though.

http://i.imgur.com/L5ZATGj.png

Still, we had a job to do!!

As I snuck around the group making sure there was no ambushes coming....they started to realize just how sneaksy I was....

"Sneaksy....we.....we need you to pull the elemental! This is only a job you can do!!!!"

"What...me? I....ok!!! I can do it!!!!! I'm ready!!!!!!"

I had to do my gnomish duty! Apparently the elemental had great magic and the first person he saw would be forced to endure his power!!! Everyone recognized that I was the only one there that had any chance of resisting it!!!!! -nods nods-

And so....I snuck into position....and when they gave me the signal...I sprung into action and started shouting at the elemental!

"Hay mud face! I'm over here! You don't have the pebbles to attack me!"

The elemental stared at me for a moment....and then I could see rage in its eyes as it rushed forward. Uhm....maybe I had overdone it a little bit.....

I turned around and jumped into the pond behind me! Moments of silence....and then the last thing I remember was hearing it start to cast a spell.....

Then, I woke up in the giants city as a ghost again!!! But I knew a mighty battle was happening, and I had played a pivotal role in it!

A few moments later I was revived to my body again....a complete gnome!

We had won!!! Defeated the elemental!!

After that, we all escaped the pit and before I knew it I was back in the common lands....

http://i.imgur.com/ZrG17u8.png

Though...I never got a chance to pick its pockets.....in fact, I didn't make any money at all!!!

Pfft, it was a good adventure, but how was I going to make a million platinum like this?!

[polishanarchy]

This is awesome!

[Thulack]

Good read.

Edit: About 5 mins after reading this i was strolling through Wakening Lands and saw your corpse. Hope there is a story behind it :P

[Hasbinbad]

typical ogre

[Soress]

/subscribed

[MaNiC]

Awesome story

[Nixtar]

You're a legend.

[Ivory]

Well, helping to fight elemental kings was pretty fun....but I had to get back to velious to get rich!! I hadn't stolen the giants and dragons treasure yet!

So, first step was trying to find a teleport back there....as I was lookin around, I saw two people, a druid and a barbarian....who said they were going to wakening lands!

http://i.imgur.com/iVbEypC.png

I told them I wanted to come too....but they laughed at me and teleported away....

It was pretty rude! They coulda just taken me too! So I send some magic messages after them "Pfft! I wanted to go too! Come back!!"

The druid replied that she was coming back to teleport me....it seemed like the problem was solved!

When she got back she began talking about keys and things. Which was fine, I am pretty good with locks. I even showed her my lockpicks!

But she wasn't impressed at all....and then, like the other druid...began sayin she was taking me home to steamfont!

http://i.imgur.com/4k910um.png

No! She was like the other one! She didn't realize I was adventuring!! Or how rich I was going to get after stealing the giants and dragons treasure!!

Before I could protest more, she used her magic and poof we appeared back in steamfont!

No no no no....that isn't where I want to go!

After some protesting she sighed and began using her teleporting magic again.....

But this time we appeared in misty thicket!!!

http://i.imgur.com/7JKL9A4.png

Uhm....closer....I guess....but still not right!!!

She kept talking about keys and things, and I kept telling her I was great with locks! Nothing to worry about!!

After a lot more protesting her friends chimed in and voted in my favor....it was 3 against one! She couldn't keep resisting under all this pressure!!

Finally she teleported one more time ....

And , at long last, we appeared in Wakening Lands! She seemed pretty shocked! I don't know why, I never even saw any locks!

Anyhow, it was time to begin my "super awesome gnome plan to get rich" strategy. I would join other adventurers fighting the giants....but I would be more focused on taking their treasure! It was foolproof!

I snuck down to the entrance of the giant city and sure enough I found adventurers there. Casually I tried to blend in and began doing adventurer stuff....eating muffins....poking things with my dagger....the usual.

They were all obviously impressed because without a word I was invited to their team!! They surely recognized how great an adventurer I was!!!

http://i.imgur.com/iKVrAse.png

And so...it began....

Time passed and I began picking the giants pockets. A few gold here, a few gold there.....it was ok I guess.

Though, oddly, I found lots of meat in their pockets?!

http://i.imgur.com/r8UXxSH.png

But after a few hours....somehow....one of the group started to catch onto me!!!!!

http://i.imgur.com/QVlgy90.png

The best course of action was to play it cool.....

"What?! No! I'm an adventurer like you fellow adventurer!!! Look out! Giants! Sorry can't talk! Gotta fight!!"

Whew, that was a close one. But nothing gnome smarts can't handle.

More time passed....and then it happened!!!....as I sneakily reached into another giants pockets....my hand felt something shiny....it definitely wasn't meat, I had found plenty of that to recognize the squish.

When I pulled it out....I had in my hand....an expensive emerald!!!!!!!

I was rich!!!!!

http://i.imgur.com/XR9vUYP.png

Before anyone caught on to what I had uhm...found....I ran away into the forest!!! I had gotten the giants treasure!! Next it was time to visit the dragons!!!

http://i.imgur.com/VBy44Ax.png

It took a long time to reach the dragons city though.....I snuck so slowly through the forest.....but eventually I made it and found the dragons liked me a lot. Obviously they had heard about my adventuring!!!!!!

After talking to some ice merchants and selling them my extra valuable gem.... I sat down to count my growing treasure account.....-nods nods- this plan was working pretty well. I was many times richer than I had been before!!!

I knew I would reach a million platinum in no time!!

http://i.imgur.com/xPkTrIt.png

[Ivory]

I was sitting in the dragon city when I heard rumors about even bigger dragons behind a secret fountain....

Why settle for city treasure when I could get the ultimate treasures?!

The problem was even my great lockpicks weren't enough to get through the fountain....

I had to find a key!!

Looking around I noticed a sleeping iksar.....this was my chance!!

http://i.imgur.com/WMwkTH6.png

"Hay, iksar....I'm pretty heavy aren't I? All this treasure I'm holding, you couldn't get up even if you wanted to!! Here's the deal...you help me get through the fountain, and I'll let you up!!"

The iksar protested a little bit....but in the end she agreed! And she knew just where to find the key too! It was being protected by a gnome sized dragon!

http://i.imgur.com/3IqArkS.png

The iksar was pretty strong, and after luring the tiny dragon alone....we ambushed it!! And the iksar took its key!

Moments later I found myself on the other side of the secret fountain.....it was time to get even more richer!!

I checked some secret maps I had bought and began sneaking towards the greatest treasure spots....

http://i.imgur.com/5HNT35H.png

Inside there were giant walruses and seahorses ....it was going to be pretty dangerous sneaking through, but, well, they don't call me sneaksy for nothing!!

Luckily though I was saved the trouble when a druid showed up behind me! Druids are really handy!!!

He used his druid magic and poof, we had made it to the other side!! Finally! I could get my treasure!!!

http://i.imgur.com/YRLEzSN.png

The first place I found were these four magic markers. My map had them labeled as "Spooky Treasure!".

Well, any treasure was good treasure, so in I went!

I snuck around for a little bit....there were spiders and bones all over.....it definitely was kind of spooky....

But as I was walking around, suddenly I heard a rattling sound behind me....

http://i.imgur.com/m0uFot5.png

I didn't even pause to look behind me!! I could feel whatever it was breathing on my neck!!!

Sometime a gnomes gotta know when to be sneaksy, and know when to ....runnnnnnn!!!!

I bolted for the exit as fast as I could!! Whatever it was chasing me close behind!!! To make it worse....spiders noticed me too!! And began chasing me!!!!!

As I neared the magic markers inside, I jumped towards them desperately!! As my hand touched the stone, I was teleported back to the icey land....I was saved!!!!

http://i.imgur.com/CHRnI2B.png

Maybe spooky treasure was too spooky for me.....I would come back there later -nods nods-

I wandered around a little bit more....and eventually came to another place....this one was marked as "Best Treasure!! 10/10!!"

http://i.imgur.com/ANu02mm.png

"Gnome, what are you doing here?!"

Some noodle neck dragon was talkin to me! He seemed to like me ok though.

"Noffin! I'm definitely not looking for your treasure!!!" I replied....

As we talked...I casually walked next to him....and felt around to try and pick his pockets.....

But then...I discovered a horrible secret....he......he wasn't wearing pants!!!! And he had no pockets!!!!!

Dragons apparently were immune to sneaksy pickpocket hands!!!!!!!!!! My plan to get their treasure was ruined!!!!!!

As I sat at the entrance of the temple depressed....out of nowhere an invisible wurm ate me :|

http://i.imgur.com/7PLduLH.png

But luckily, soon after I was brought back to my body after being a ghost for a while!!

That's it!! I had had enough of this place!! There was no treasure here!!

So I hid...and waited for the first druid to come along and get me outta there....it was time to go back to the Faydark....I had to get stronger I think.

[Baler]

http://i.imgur.com/7PLduLH.png

I got a genuine laugh from this. Thank you!
Keep the story going! Love it! 5/5 stars

[Tasslehofp99]

lol 10/10 good reading

[Sorn]

Fanart

7530

[Ivory]

Fanart

7530

Lol that is best fan art! <3

[MilanderTruewield]

Where is the "Like" button?

[Froakula]

I saw your corpses in icewell I think today. Good stuff!

[AenorVZ]

This erudite slippin

http://i.imgur.com/MWEGO6w.png

[Crashking]

Gnomes aren't the only rogues that can solo.

My Dwarf Rogue had soloed from start to 19, and from level 12 to 19 was the most interesting.

Ended up fighting and using a lot of bandages, but came out 1500 plat richer and had full backstab skill of 100 and bind wounds of 100.

Since then has gained a few more levels about to hit 23 if I would just get back around to fighting with her, but other toons have priority here.

[Landael]

One of my Favorite players on p99, the Glowing Gnome :D

[Truheart]

awesomeness, thank you!

[Erati]

these are way better than Rosen the Archer's adventures !

:D

looking forward to seeing ( or not seeing ) this lil gnome as I druid around

[Phenyo]

This is how the game is meant to be played

[Nicoline]

Really enjoy reading about your adventures and watching you grow!

[Aadill]

Holy crap i didn't realize i was hanging out with a celebrity the other day

[AgentEpilot]

Sneaksy you know better then to try to pick pocket the clockworks

[Ivory]

Sneaksy you know better then to try to pick pocket the clockworks

I violated code 5150 :o But!! It was worth it!!!

[AgentEpilot]

I violated code 5150 :o But!! It was worth it!!!

Another violated code lol, love the stories by the way.

[Ivory]

After leaving Velious....I decided to go back to the Faydark and get stronger. I figured I would need to learn new sneaksy techniques to get the best treasures!

I had heard the elves were fighting orcs....so I headed to the orc city to see what I could do!

http://i.imgur.com/lpft7Wv.png

I fought many orcs there! And took their belts as proof! I knew the dwarves offered pretty good rewards for proof of orc hunting, so that is where I went once my bags were full of belts.

http://i.imgur.com/n7B1vWF.png

While I was there I even studied with the dwarf rogues a little bit! Learning how to backstab!

Then...as I was leaving...my keen gnome senses started to tell me something was wrong....

Indeed, there were far less guards than normal!!!

That is when I saw him....it was a dark elf!! Ambushing the dwarf guards!!!

This was my chance!! To put all my rogue training to use!!!!!!

http://i.imgur.com/Zg1deMt.png

It was a success!!! I had made money!!

I was pretty proud of myself after that....and decided to go back to Ak'anon to show Welno all the treasure I had earned. It wasn't quite 1 million platinum, but it was close-ish!

http://i.imgur.com/EfbgBbw.png

Welno was pretty impressed by all I had earned already! So much that he gave me an ancient scroll he was keeping in a small basket sneakily covered by crumpled paper!! Welno sure knew his stuff, no one would look for it there!

As I opened the scroll....I read carefully its story of an ancient gnome technique....the gnomish shuffle! The instructions weren't quite clear, but it was a start! I had to master it!!

So I went out into the Steamfont mountains to practice. Welno said there had been some trouble with the minotaurs...so figured that might be a good place to start.

http://i.imgur.com/hnSSZ0U.png

It didn't take me too long to find where the minotaurs were....but I was shocked when I discovered they were keeping gnomes as slaves!! I had to save them!! For free even!!!

I lured the minotaurs away...one after another.....and on each one I practiced trying to figure out the gnomish shuffle....

Slowly I started to adjust my movements and timing ....until....finally....I learnt how to slip behind a minotaur fighting me and backstab it before it could notice!!!! I couldn't do it every time, only maybe 50-60 percent....but it was a start!!

The minotaurs after seeing the ancient technique being used were so scared the rest of them retreated....I had done it! The gnome slaves were free!!!

http://i.imgur.com/z5sHrHm.png

As I was celebrating my victory and newfound power.....I heard a distant call for help....

The minotaur hero had woken!! Surely warned by one of the ones that ran away from me!!!

I had heard rumors of the hero....the greatest minotaur fighter there was....slayer of many gnomes..... even with my technique I wouldn't stand a chance.

But this was my responsibility....I couldn't back down....I had to do something!!! For the sake of the gnomes!!! Also, I was an adventurer!!

http://i.imgur.com/UdfE6oz.png

I ran to where they had last spotted the hero.... I didn't even have sow or any magic on me!

I wasn't quite sure what I was going to do, but I had to do something.

Though, I did have one thing others adventurers don't....gnomish rogue smarts!!! With some thought it didn't take me long to devise a gnomish plan to save the others from the heroes rampage!!

There was no time to wait, I rushed into phase 1!! So...sneakily...I got close to the minotaur hero.....and threw a dagger at him!! I think I mighta missed, I didn't really see, since by the time the dagger got to him I was already running away!!!

"GNOME!! IT WAS YOU!!!" Yup, he had noticed! I could hear his snort and shout as he began charging after me!

This was getting dangerous!!!! But so far, my plan was going pretty good!!!

I ran as fast as I could....not sure how fast he would be....if even I could outrun him.....I had to put phase 2 of my plan into action!!

But, as I neared the windmills....the guard I had arranged an ambush with was already gone!!! The coward!!!!

Ok ok, it was no time to panic....I had to keep calm...and also keep running!!

I ran all the way back near the gates of Ak'anon with the minotaur close behind me! I had a backup plan!!

Then I saw Watchman Dreeb! This was my chance!

"Sneaksy? Wha....don't stop running! There is a minotaur after you!!!!"

"Save me save me save me!!!!!"

Dreeb rushed into action and met the minotaur hero head on. I knew he was pretty strong from fighting wolves, so knew he could handle a minotaur hero, maybe!

http://i.imgur.com/4q1ULV0.png

A few moments later my plan was complete! The minotaur hero was dead!!! I guess Dreeb gets some credit too, maybe 8 percent!

I let the other gnomes know it was safe to come out and the mountains broke out in celebration! I (and Dreeb I guess) had done it!! The Steamfont mountains were safe another day!!

http://i.imgur.com/o2YspQp.png

[AgentEpilot]

LOL Sneaksy I have use for you in the Office of Gnomaldtrump's Make Ak'Anon Great Again campaign, I will personally appoint you as head of security. Not many can defeat the Minotaur Hero.

[Ivory]

As I sat around thinking of what to do next....I remembered hearing rumors of a great (and rich!) dwarf city in Velious....

Hmm, I had already gotten to level 14 ...so I was almost a master rogue!....yes, this seemed like the perfect opportunity to get rich!!

So I chartered a druid to go to the dwarf city!!

http://i.imgur.com/h5qqRHf.png

One we got there, I tried to sneak past a drunk ogre sleeping near the stream at the dwarf city gates...

But...as I got close.....the ogre reached out and grabbed me!!!! Obviously mistaking me for some type of delicious meal while dreaming!!!

I poked him with my dagger a few times and he didn't even wake up....using my quick gnome thinking I started stuffing muffins in his mouth!! A full ogre won't try to dream-eat gnomes~!

Eventually it worked and he let me go!! No longer interested in the delicious dream gnome meal.

Humm, this place was pretty dangerous! I had to be more careful!

http://i.imgur.com/3V8n4km.png

Once inside the dwarf city....I got right to work....sneaking deep into the cities halls.....

http://i.imgur.com/K51snwL.png

Pocket after pocket I searched for money and gems. Sometimes getting even handfuls of gold! 8 or 9 coins!!! I did it for almost the entire day!!!

http://i.imgur.com/EFpMZmU.png

But even as I kept picking pockets....I couldn't find any gems like I found from the giant before.

Eventually I found myself in the great throne room! I had heard there was a king of the dwarves, maybe he was invisible?

Either way, I didn't have time to think about it! I snuck around and before long discovered a secret passage behind the throne....

There I made the greatest discovery in the history of gnomes......a giant treasure chest!!! Filled with gold and gems and riches!!!!!

http://i.imgur.com/tTkeSpR.png

"Intruder!!!" A guard yelled from behind me....eep, I had been caught!!!

He took me before the others in the great hall....

http://i.imgur.com/jlCGBIw.png

"We have been watching you Gnome! We know you have been picking all of the pockets of the council!"

"You can't prove noffin!!!" I replied....

But my masterful defense was no good.....and the dwarves justice was swift and harsh....they tossed me down the pit in the throne room!!!

When I got down there, I noticed the body of another adventurer. It was Maor! The cleric I had come to the town with!! Had they caught her too?!

http://i.imgur.com/nNDcfRx.png

Luckily I'm a gnome, and also sneaky, so I got to work dragging the clerics body out of the depths of the punishment tunnel. I'm sure the council thought they got rid of me!!! But they would need more than that!!!

It didn't take me too long to sneak out of the tunnels and back into the city. It had been a long day of picking pockets, and my bank account was definitely growing! I guess rumors of the dwarves being so rich were only half true....it seemed the king had all the gold and no one else had too much.

http://i.imgur.com/O0OGoIl.png

As I relaxed in the bar I figured I would need to find a new place to find treasure....just after seeing what Huldin and Katrin had in their pockets first :3

http://i.imgur.com/9krQy5D.png

[Brut]

Ogre didn't get to eat the gnome in the end?
Very tragic tale, is like Shakespeare.

[mr_jon3s]

No more Sneaksy????

[Bummey]

http://i.imgur.com/zgQ6jPs.jpg

[Ivory]

After my time in the dwarf city....I decided to head back to the giant city and see what I could "find".

http://i.imgur.com/pjHYe10.png

I spent some time looking in giants shoe-pockets....but never found anything that good. I guess giants keep their good treasure in the tallest pockets.

But, eventually I ran across some non giants! Who looked like they were headed further into the city! Surely there would be treasure there! So I followed them and seamlessly slipped into their group....

http://imgur.com/vcR0tc5.png

"Why hello there fellow adventurers? Today is a nice day for adventuring and getting treasure isn't it?"

http://imgur.com/Ez1MdMq.png

But, even my best efforts couldn't find me a group!!!! It was ok though, as I noticed another adventurer that seemed out of place.....so we made our own group for the invasion!!

http://imgur.com/hWtYMTO.png

As we mingled amongst the other adventurers, I met another gnome named Parachute. In fact, the invasion seemed to have lots of gnomes! Which was a pretty good sign of future success.

I chatted with Parachute a bit....and learnt that apparently we were going after one of the most important giants!

Not only that, but as we heard the important giant come barreling down the hall to avenge the others we had beaten....Parachute wagered 100 platinum that I couldn't hit it first!! Before the rest of the invasion!!!

http://imgur.com/rth8lQU.png

With that much money on the line, how could I say no?!

I quickly hid in a corner where I heard the giant coming from....and waited for my chance to ambush him! I would be the first! I had to!!

But, as the giant turned the corner, a barbarian ran out ahead of me!!!!!!! He must have wanted the money too!!! I couldn't let this happen!!!!!

So I sprinted forward, under the barbarians legs and threw a dagger at the giant!!!!

http://imgur.com/o7vahvC.png

The last thing I remember is the giant turning around to look at me...and then everything went dark.

But, it must have worked! Because when I came to, the giant had been defeated and everyone said I had hit it first!!! Obviously my dagger having weakened the giant enough for the others to be able to defeat it!!!!

Parachute admitted defeat and surrendered the platinum, and even threw in a fancy mask for my bravery!

http://imgur.com/f0RhiXu.png

I also met an iksar named Upheaval who had been watching, and who was so impressed that he doubled the bet! And gave me 100pp and even a necklace and earring!

http://imgur.com/dpWSO1b.png

After that, we killed a few more giants and every now and then would play a game of dice. I think mine were broken though....

http://imgur.com/DHG9HaB.png

Overall, it was a pretty successful invasion! The giants might have not had much in their pockets....but somehow I still managed to fill mine!!

http://imgur.com/L7khvfY.png

[Ivory]

After my time in the icy lands of Velious....I was ready for somewhere warmer! So left to visit the halflings in Rivervale. To count all my treasure, and also talk to the Deep Pockets guild ....if anyone had some ideas of where to find treasure, I bet it would be them!!

Turned out I had collected almost 360 platinum of treasure so far! Which, according to my math, is about 1 percent of the million platinum I needed!

http://imgur.com/QnLGws6.png

After talking with the leaders of the Deep Pockets (which, I learnt was just their last names....not representative of the deepness of their pockets)....they told me that there were light creatures out in the planes of Karana I could hunt for lots of treasure!

That was good enough for me! So I booked passage on the next caravan headed there!!

http://imgur.com/MFSnKGk.png

After days of travel, we finally arrived! It was time to get richer!!!!

But.....as it turns out....hunting wisps is hard work. I had made it to level 15 at least, and gotten a few of those valuable light stones....but still, I was starting to think there had to be a better place to get treasure than this....

As I was thinking at the guard tower....I noticed the guards seemed almost in a daze from standing in the sun all day.....

http://imgur.com/P5sBkRQ.png

Carefully I snuck behind them...and rummaged around in their pockets....not really expecting much, but copper is copper!

As I checked his other pocket, I loosened the strap on his shield to make room....and....it started to fall! Using my lightning quick gnome reflexes, I caught it before he noticed....

Wait....this was even better than copper!! Shields had to be worth lots!!

And it wasn't like I was stealing or anything. The shield had almost fallen on the ground and almost gotten lost!! And lost things are fair game to gnomes who find them. So, really, if you think about it, I was doing these guards a favor by finding their shields before they got lost!

http://imgur.com/1Cml5jT.png

But....there weren't too many guards around....so after being helpful and finding both of the guards shields...I went back to looking around for some more.

And that is when I saw it....a hill giant!!! Almost like the velious giants, but these were fatter! And maybe even richer!!

http://imgur.com/KuF63Po.png

So, I quietly followed it....climbing up its leg and rummaging in its pockets....and sure enough, there were handfuls of gold inside!!!! First I pulled out 30 pieces....then 15 pieces....then 7 pieces....this giant was rich!!!

I felt like a money vampire!!! Who needs lifetap when you have moneytap?

http://imgur.com/yHlYjWo.png

But....as I climbed down from the giant....suddenly he turned around!! Having noticed his pockets were much lighter!!!

"You can't prove noffin!!!!" I shouted as he ran after me!!

http://imgur.com/yQtcdaf.png

I had to think fast! Giants were nothing to mess around with !! If he caught me, I would be mooshed!!

That's when I remembered the guards! Surely they could help!!!

http://imgur.com/Sus3P10.png

The two guards and the giant battled....and it was close!! But it seemed they had lost their shields somehow! Making it harder for them to defend against the giant!! And...in the end....the giant defeated them both!

Then, he saw me nearby watching....and resumed his chase.

http://imgur.com/2gEE8RA.png

I could see the giant was hurt though....very hurt.

Hummm, being level 15 I wasn't strong enough to face the giant face to face....but I had another idea!

I began throwing daggers at him! I always keep a backpack full for emergencies!

Little by little my daggers started to wear him down. He couldn't catch me, I was too fast!

Finally, he surrendered and began to run away. But doesn't he know you should never run away from a sneaksy gnome?! The advantage was mine! I followed after him and poked him!

http://imgur.com/PZKLJWw.png

In the end....I had done it!! I had defeated the giant!! Alone!! It seems hill giants are no match for level 15 gnomes! And, it turned out, he had been keeping more than just piles of gold....he also had a pile of platinum kept in a secret pocket!!

[skarlorn]

SNEAKSY - FINDER OF SHIELDS, POKER OF GIANTS.

hero to us all :,)

[Pumpedup]

this is what unemployment looks like

[Lobus]

finally something worth reading at work when I don't want risk getting fired to TunnelQuest

[skarlorn]

this is what unemployment looks like

just leave now, you don't belong here

[GreldorEQ]

SNEAKSY - FINDER OF SHIELDS, POKER OF GIANTS.

hero to us all :,)

First of her name!

[Spyder73]

This guy writes fanfic and gets 100% praise, I write fanfic and get trolled into oblivon.

#Mad
#WuTang

[maskedmelon]

This guy writes fanfic and gets 100% praise, I write fanfic and get trolled into oblivon.

#Mad
#WuTang

Yeah, it is interesting. I've taken it as a learning opportunity (to figure out why this resonates so heavily with people). I think it is because it is short and to the point and punctuated with pictures. Pretty much anyone can appreciate the silliness and nobody feels threatened by it. The character, while confident and prideful is wildly self deprecating, but unaware and successful. People appreciate that, because in some small way it speaks to sincere fears (failure) and desires (success) everyone has and their able to smile at the suggestion of hope regardless of its fictitious nature. I'm not sure tbh though. Going to think on it more. ^^ IIRC people did respond favorably to a lot of your older stuff (~ 。^)b Props to Ivory though on writing something the people here enjoy.

[Chaboo_Cleric]

This guy writes fanfic and gets 100% praise, I write fanfic and get trolled into oblivon.

#Mad
#WuTang

Should've been a gnome bro

[Izmael]

this is what unemployment looks like

No capitalization, no punctuation, is critical and negative while everyone else is having fun... red player spotted!

[Lhancelot]

Well done! I enjoyed reading from the start to this point, keep it up. :p

P.S. I know a great place for Sneaksy to hunt for plats! Runnyeye the goblin stronghold near Rivervale! It has a bank, even a Goblin King who wears a crown! I am sure the goblins would be great to pick pocket!

[Nixtar]

"You can't prove noffin'!!!" #Sneaksy2016

[Ivory]

Should've been a gnome bro

Ya, gnomes is magic!

http://i.imgur.com/2vGKEJQ.gif

[Zuranthium]

Nice giant kill, you sure did teach that dumb oaf a lesson.

[Sorn]

7809

what happened

[Ivory]

what happened

I didn't do noffin! It was a setup!!!

http://i.imgur.com/HvaZEVa.png

[jolanar]

this is what unemployment looks like

https://cdn.meme.am/instances/69179454.jpg

[Bummey]

ilu Sneaksy

[Turbs]

moar!

[Ivory]

I was doing my usual giant pocket checking and guard shield finding....when suddenly I got word that armies of bugs were approaching!!

They marched across Karana, eating everything in their path (especially people). The poor gypsy camp never stood a chance!

http://imgur.com/0qQPJzA.png

Asking around a bit, I learnt they were being lead by a queen. A giant bug more dangerous than even a giant!! And worse.... she had an appetite for treasure!!! Which I didn't appreciate, that was my job!!

But...as I thought about it....that meant she was probably full of treasure too....

I knew what I had to do...I had to get the treas....I mean, save the Karanas from the swam mother and her army!!!

So I set out to track her down and before long I had followed her broodlings back to where she was....

http://imgur.com/LKOE3jt.png

Sneakily I threw a dagger at her to lure her away from the broodlings.....the fight was on!!! It was time to put my plan into action!! .... I ran away.

http://imgur.com/VWkaKsk.png

"Oh, hello Sneaksy, how are you today? You haven't happened to see a shield laying around have you?"

"Hi! Uhm, what? Shield? I don't know! It's a nice day right?! Nothing strange is happening! Oh no! Look out! A wild monster is coming that I have nothing to do with!!!!!!!!!"

The guards leapt into action! Doing their best to fend off the giant insect that was seemingly invading their tower!

http://imgur.com/OEWR85q.png

Sadly....like the giant....they were no match for the swarm mother.... as I expected!

They had done their duty though! The swarm mother had been weakened enough for me to pounce!! And I began again throwing my daggers at it as I ran!

And, like the giant... after a long battle the swarm mother was eventually overwhelmed by my gnomish might!

http://imgur.com/z5rDZLo.png

I carefully cut open the carapace to see if it was true, if she really was a treasure eater......and as the rain cleared away the goo, I saw it.....the most amazing ruby I had ever seen!! Giant....sparkling....red.... and mine!!!

http://imgur.com/haVWDb4.png

It has to be my most valuable treasure!! And now I keep it on me always!! I couldn't trust a bank with such a ruby. I even think I like gems more than platinum!

[PL_Barton]

Sneaksy has been joining Dagmore and his friends on adventures! Even drinking with two dwarves while she is supposed to be working.

[khanable]

What level is that swarm queen? Isn't little sneaksy like level 15? That's pretty rad

[Ivory]

I stuck around Karanas a little bit longer....visiting the guards at their towers now and then to see if they had gotten a new shipment of shields in....

But I couldn't help thinking that maybe there were more shields out there....somewhere, shields as far as they eye could see....

Then it came to me....the city!! That is where a gnome could find as many shields as she could carry!!!

So I left the Karanas and headed for Qeynos....stopping on the way at all of the guard towers to help, of course.

http://imgur.com/RROnnqB.png

Qeynos was a pretty nice city!! The guards can be kind of mean sometimes....but nothin I couldn't handle. And, as I suspected, they had a lot of shields laying around!

Who puts a shield on an arm? That is just asking for it to get lost. Good thing I found it before that happened.

http://imgur.com/RypkMJ4.png

As I sat in the bank counting my treasure and bags of shields, I realized that this wasn't the only city with shields....there were lots of others!!! I could "help" guards all across Norrath! Finding shields! Being a hero!!! Getting rich!! It was time to answer my lifes calling!!!!!

http://imgur.com/K5OB6pN.png

Before long I was back in Kelethin. I had remembered seeing shields a long time ago there. I'm sure they would be so thankful for my help.

http://imgur.com/UhvDcqA.png

This city was even better than Qeynos too! Shields everywhere!! I was getting so heavy with shields I had to take shield selling breaks!!!

http://imgur.com/Q9jGpw9.png

Though, it wasn't without its dangers.....I think the guards got confused sometimes! I was just helping!!! Still, noffin I couldn't handle!!! Gnomes is hard to catch!!

http://imgur.com/wOCdmAn.png

After I had helped all of the elf guards....it was time to visit another city!

http://imgur.com/uXkHnpS.png

I discovered high elves don't really use many shields.....but still, I did manage to help them find other things!

http://imgur.com/WW3MU1v.png

I also ran across a few sleeping guards, I was sure they wouldn't mind if I borrowed their swords.....really, I was doing them a favor, it is dangerous to sleep with swords.

http://imgur.com/4zCVoCe.png

Still....I knew my work wasn't done.....this was only the beginning......

[Ivory]

http://imgur.com/76YL82p.png

"Why hello Sneaksy, I haven't seen you around here for a while. What are you up to?"

"Hiya Dreeb! I'm not doin noffin! Just...uhm....buyin muffins...."

"Ok, stay out of trouble!"

I knew Ak'anon would be a perfect place to get shields from. I'd grown up here, I knew every guards patrol..... I wouldn't leave until I had found all of the shields there were!!!!

So, I rushed inside and began my work! Even getting our tiny gnome-gnome guards shields!!!

http://imgur.com/lmrcize.png

I spent days in Ak'anon....finding all the shields I could.... really, if you think about it, guards can run better without shields. I was doin them a favor!! What if something fast invaded Ak'anon? With shields they would never be able to defend it!!

I had a few run-ins with the guards, but they couldn't stop me!!!

But before I left....I had to try and see what was in one special persons pockets.....I'd always been curious....I just had to know!!! It was surely something good!!!!!

For this job though, I would need a disguise.

http://imgur.com/zzLxfEr.png

Inside the clockwork I could get anywhere!! And it didn't take long to slip past all of the extra security.....

When I got there....I carefully crawled out of the clockwork....this was it.....

http://imgur.com/iVoczWl.png

I had to check the Kings pockets!!!!!

But...as I felt around....I heard shouting from above....

http://imgur.com/WdCVWPO.png

Oh no! I'd violated code 5150!!! The most serious of all codes!!!!!!

Moments later, everything went black.

When I woke up, I was in the torture chamber....and the king was behind me...

http://imgur.com/KfBL59Z.png

"Sneaksy, we know you have been taking the kingdoms shields! You better than anyone should know gnomes see everything!!"

"I didn't do noffin!!!!" I protested....but I knew he didn't believe me....

"Now, if you don't want to face the torturer, promise to never steal from the gnomes again!"

"Ok-ish!"

"....good enough."

http://imgur.com/QMKEa8g.png

Oh well, I had already gotten all the shields I wanted anyhow....and I'd been makin quite a lot of moneys from all of the cities I'd visited!!

http://imgur.com/hzFZkhh.png

But I still wasn't done....there were more cities out there..... more shields to be gnomed!

[thufir]

This guy writes fanfic and gets 100% praise, I write fanfic and get trolled into oblivon.

#Mad
#WuTang

Yeah, it is interesting. I've taken it as a learning opportunity (to figure out why this resonates so heavily with people). I think it is because it is short and to the point and punctuated with pictures. Pretty much anyone can appreciate the silliness and nobody feels threatened by it. The character, while confident and prideful is wildly self deprecating, but unaware and successful. People appreciate that, because in some small way it speaks to sincere fears (failure) and desires (success) everyone has and their able to smile at the suggestion of hope regardless of its fictitious nature. I'm not sure tbh though. Going to think on it more. ^^ IIRC people did respond favorably to a lot of your older stuff (~ 。^)b Props to Ivory though on writing something the people here enjoy.
for both of you, your stuff was well written enough, but it was about topics that didn't resonate with anyone. it was full of in-jokes and nasty sideswipes. nobody cared about someone's quest for an RL band name for their character, or their injokey exploits with their three friends. parodying that same band name quest that nobody liked is a fast ticket to nowhere.

ivory's stuff is friendly, cheerful, and most importantly, puts game events in an amusing context that is the best part about playing a sandbox game: writing your own stories. everyone can understand it and it's hilarious. this is the kind of thing that inspires people to play everquest. random people he meets even make it into the storyline! you want to write something that resonates on forums about classic everquest, that's your key.

kudos to you ivory, your ranger stories were awesome and this is even better. =)

[Jimjam]

Hah, this reminds me of something I do. There has been a bad shipment of spears in Rivervale, whenever I am in town (read: waiting for a rez) I pass the time by informing and enforcing the product recall on the Deputies. Naturally they are reluctant to let me disarm them, but the Sherriff has put a 10pp bounty on each of these bad spears so naturally it is my duty to disarm as many as I can and sell them before I click the rez box.

[Ivory]

Next it was time to visit the halflings again!! But this time for business....

I've found when visiting a new city for business, it is best to get bound right away.....

http://imgur.com/vt7k1TC.png

After-all, this is pretty dangerous work!!!

http://imgur.com/9xh0jyN.png

But....shields don't find themselves.....

http://imgur.com/PvSyp9z.png

Again, I took my time....visiting each guard and giving them the attention they deserved...even going out to their wall guards to see if they had any shields that needed finding!

After another long day of gnome business, I sat in the bank and counted my treasure....almost 1,000 platinum!!!!

http://imgur.com/RNWe54B.png

But I was facing a bigger problem....I was running out of cities~!

Should I travel to the ogre and troll cities? Or maybe the dark elves? Or...iksar?! I'm sure each had plenty of shields! But they were even more dangerous than normal shield finding work!!!

So, I traveled to the commons later that night to relax and think......

http://imgur.com/1K5yfH2.png

And there, as you usually do in the commons trading tunnels, I met a lot of shady characters (including tiny iksars!).

They told me of a mask....one that could disguise me so I could get closer to the evil city guards....and their shields!!

I had to have it!!! The ancient mask of the undead frogloks!!!!

[Ivory]

Hah, this reminds me of something I do. There has been a bad shipment of spears in Rivervale, whenever I am in town (read: waiting for a rez) I pass the time by informing and enforcing the product recall on the Deputies. Naturally they are reluctant to let me disarm them, but the Sherriff has put a 10pp bounty on each of these bad spears so naturally it is my duty to disarm as many as I can and sell them before I click the rez box.

I wish I had disarm!! I would be so much richer!! Shield only sell for 1-2pps.....still adds up with a few bags full mw aha ha.

kudos to you ivory, your ranger stories were awesome and this is even better. =)

Thanks :D I had to catch up on my shield adventures....so I can get to what happened the last couple of nights. Probably the most amazing adventure yet! And, more importantly, has given me something that will make for some great future adventures!!!

[Crookstinger]

She already teased it but I'll delete my comment anyway. Looking forward to the next few tales. By the way, Sneaksy, what is your pickpocket skill level, and/or at what level did you start to be able to get the shields regularly without being whacked by the guards? I am just starting to level up my pickpocket skill.

[Sorn]

omg crookstinger spoiler alert >:(

[Nune]

Was a pleasure talking with you last night young sneaks,make sure you take me up on that offer if you ever need help!

[entruil]

posting to show support for good times... enjoyed immensely...

[Raev]

Sneaksy did I see your corpse on poop mountain or was I imagining things

[RDawg816]

Sneaksy did I see your corpse on poop mountain or was I imagining things
I'm pretty sure the answer will be "You can't prove nuffin!"

[Ivory]

Sneaksy did I see your corpse on poop mountain or was I imagining things

I'm not sure what poop mountain is....

Also....

I'm pretty sure the answer will be "You can't prove nuffin!"

^^ :D

[Ivory]

By the way, Sneaksy, what is your pickpocket skill level, and/or at what level did you start to be able to get the shields regularly without being whacked by the guards? I am just starting to level up my pickpocket skill.

Humm, I get attacked by guards a lot ...

Not sure what level is minimum, since I kind of discovered it around level 14 I think? I've tried pick pocketing lots of things to try and find riches ....running across the shield thing was a big score!

[Ivory]

((This one is a little out of order....but makes sense with the last adventure, so figured I would add it here instead of having it delayed so long....adventure backlog....so many adventures! Thanks to Department of Fun and everyone helping out! Was fun!! We need more events on the server!!))

I woke up to the most horrible thing that could ever happen to a gnome.... I had been cursed....and wasn't a gnome anymore!!! Instead, somehow I had become a halfling! And all of my things were gone!

So I returned to Rivervale as fast as I could to find out what had happened. Surely they would know something.

http://imgur.com/wPYTfzy.png

When I got there I discovered that in order to see a curse specialist I would have to pay over 100 platinum! Easy enough I thought, I was pretty rich from shield money.....

But, then the 2nd most horrible thing that could happen to a gnome happened.....the bank wouldn't let me access my treasure!!! Obviously thinking I was really a halfling instead of Sneaksy the gnome.

I had to make a lotta moneys, and fast! Problem was I wasn't used to this halfling body so pickin pockets wasn't going to be happenin anytime soon.

That's when I heard about a great halfling race that was due to take place that day ...and, better yet, amongst the prizes was a ruby (though, obviously not as good as my ruby, if I could find it again)!!! With that I could easily afford to see a halfling curse specialist.

I knew what I had to do....I had to enter the race...and I had to win!

But first, I needed to train my new halfling body to prepare myself. To win, I would need every edge I could get....

http://imgur.com/YCAmHsv.png

But, my halfling body was so weak! Which is understandable, compared to the body of a gnome, any body would feel useless.

Luckily a nearby halfling mistook me as one of their own and shielded me with some magic to train.

http://imgur.com/Lqya1Tu.png

It was time to train like never before......and train I did!!!

http://imgur.com/eCgIpMf.png

Obviously the best training for a race is bard training! If I could make it through the Misty Thicket to the great wall like this, the race would be cake!

http://imgur.com/mluetkc.png

Even though it was tough, I managed to do it! It was time to return to the city and await the race.

One by one halflings began to show up....my competition.....

Eventually even a most fancy halfling!

He seemed pretty strong, showing off his strength by picking a fight with the Priest of Discord. We cheered him on, gathering around to watch.... though this only angered the priest....and we were all punished.....

http://imgur.com/t8X5zyL.png

But this was no time for games!! My halfling curse was getting worse! It was unstable!!! Symptoms including random swelling ...the most dangerous of symptoms!!!

http://imgur.com/Uk0Y923.png

Everything eventually calmed down and I was back to normal.....though the priest looked a little different now. I was starting to suspect the fancy halfling of ...things....

http://imgur.com/XfuY6kJ.png

More and more halflings arrived as the race start grew closer. A fellow gnome even came! Handing out fireworks! Even in a halfling race, the greatness of gnomes is still evident.

http://imgur.com/pywjA5K.png

[Ivory]

We continued to party till nightfall as more halflings arrived.

http://imgur.com/XHAqgOI.png

I'd never seen so many halflings in one spot before!!

http://imgur.com/0KJhMl1.png

Eventually it was finally time. The great halfling race was about to begin!!!

http://imgur.com/1Hqx2MA.png

One false start sent most off into Misty Thicket....but after calling them back, the real race was on!!!

Little did the others realized I had a secret weapon a druid had given me...... griffon eggs!!! With their power nothing would be able to match my great speed!!!

http://imgur.com/jFYeg0L.png

We ran for what seemed like forever....

Getting past Misty Thicket was easy enough, wolves and bears can't catch an inside gnome!

Runnyeye was a little trickier....but even in my halfling body I still was pretty sneaksy, letting me get past the goblins as other halflings fell around me.

And then, as we entered the gorge.... I made my first mistake. I was too cautious and began sneaksing through it!!!

Half way through I realized my mistake and began running, but by then the leaders had gotten a far lead... it was time to really put on the gas!

Problem was I put on too much gas, and got lost in Karana. Confusing the town to get sow with another different town!!! More valuable time was lost!!!!

http://imgur.com/qy1f7Kl.png

But I had an idea, I knew I could make up time on the ramp! And sure enough my special gnome running techniques let me pass multiple halflings!

Sadly, when I entered highpass....it was at the exact same time a cleric happened to be exiting it....with gnolls after her.....my fragile halfling body didn't stand a chance....

Still! I wasn't going to give up!!! And began again!! This time easily getting through highpass without problems.

Though as I entered kithicor, I noticed it was just about nighttime. Still, I couldn't let it slow me down like in the gorge! This was no time for sneaksing!

I kept a lookout for undead ambushes and just kept running....before long seeing the entrance to the city. I had made it!!!

http://imgur.com/yTSMDTD.png

As I suspected, when I entered Rivervale the winners had already come in.....and to make things worse....my halfling curse had advanced!!!! Now I was a quarterling!!!

http://imgur.com/2kNy67Q.png

I was doomed!!! ....no ruby....no cure....but, at least I had some fireworks left over....so I made the best of it and used my gnomish skills to put on a fireworks show the likes never before seen in Rivervale!!!

http://imgur.com/tHYUqte.png

As the party died down...and everyone began to leave....I was approached by the druids of Rivervale.

"Sneaksy...you are a fireworks genius!! We've never seen such a display before!!"

It turned out they had been so impressed by my fireworks they offered to see me for free!!!

http://imgur.com/6REBdjF.png

Apparently I was simply low on vitamin J. So Hibbs mixed up a little jumjum juice and I was good as new! I was a gnome again!! Ready to resume my adventures!!!!

[skarlorn]

sneaksy you a star!

[Sorn]

Yay!

[aMindAmok]

It's been 4 days... 4 entire days since the last adventure of Sneaksy. I'm about to die from withdrawals. No pressure though. =P

[ZiggyTheMuss]

The people demand more Sneaksy!

[mr_jon3s]

Sneaksy needs to make a guild called The Sticky Bandits.

[fan D]

^ hey mr jon3s

[skarlorn]

Sneaksy!!!

I just hit level 25 on Borgnach. Then i lifted 16pp off a giant!!!

[Ivory]

Halfling races were pretty fun, but I still had to find that mask the iksar had told me about! With it I could "help" so many other cities of their shields!.....So I left the halflings and continued my adventure!

It wasn't so hard, the Iksar had pretty good directions. Just past the desert of Ro and in the middle of a swamp.... I found it....

http://imgur.com/DJUl1eM.png

I was surprised to see frog people! Even more surprised was that they didn't try to attack me! No sneaksing required! It was obvious they didn't know I was after their legendary mask.

Seeing as I was likely the first person to every encounter these creatures....it was up to me to name them.....feople seemed right.

http://imgur.com/ymiQzKC.png

Inside the feople city I inconspicuously asked around, making sure not to tip anyone off to why I was there...

"So....have you seen a magic mask that turns people into dark elves around?"

"What?! Only the ghoul assassin has such a thing! In the lower parts of the city! You are after it aren't you? Trying to rob us?!"

"I'm not! I was just asking for a friend!"

"Ok then"

It was a close call, but nothing my quick thinking couldn't handle. I had all the information I needed....it was time to find this assassin....

Since the feople didn't mind me around, it didn't take that long till I found the passage to the lower part of the city.

http://imgur.com/tePMnIp.png

The ghouls seemed a lot meaner than the living feople. So I didn't bother asking them any questions.....it was time to put my sneaksing skills into action. All the none sneaksing above felt unnatural!

I explored a while, sneaking past bats...and skeletons....

Then I heard it...the sounds of battle coming from down the hall!!! I snuck to see what was happening. Though when I got there all I found was an undead dead feople....

http://imgur.com/s4CclYI.png

But he had a bag!!! Free ground treasure!!!! The best kind of treasure!!!!

I continued searching around...climbing a nearby ladder into a small room.

That is when I saw it....a giant ogre!!! He musta been the one that got into a fight with the feople below!

http://imgur.com/BMivSJg.png

"Me see you gnome..."

"You don't see noffin!! Also! I'm not givin it back!!"

"Give back?"

"The bag! It's mine!"

"I no care bout bag. I look for belt."

"Ok! I'll help you find a belt for a little bit if you help me find a mask!"

"Ya, ok, I no want masks, I want belt."

Ogres seemed to really like belts....but it worked out for me! Now we just had to set a trap and wait till an assassin walked by! Then do a reverse-ambush on him!!!

So we waited.....eventually another ogre showing up too....

http://imgur.com/zRjZ6of.png

Then...out of nowhere....the feople assassin appeared!! It was so sneaksy I didn't even sense it coming!!!

Lucky for the ogres, I was ready and sprung into action with my daggers! They could beat the other feople that showed up ok....but everyone knows only a rogue can fight a rogue!!

It was a pretty good fight, no ogres or gnomes died.....and in the end....we had defeated the feople assassin!

http://imgur.com/R5j8o6d.png

The ogres didn't have much interest in the re-dead feople....so I rummaged around in its mouth (where obviously feople keep extra things) and pulled out a rather unassuming mask....was this it?

I slipped it on and.....poof! I turned into a dark elf!!!

http://imgur.com/e1eI0pc.png

At last! I had found the legendary mask!!!!

I waved goodbye to the ogres and wished them good luck with the belt finding.....I'd been down in the city for what musta been days!!

It was time to see if this masked really fooled anyone.....I approached a troll camp out in the swamp wearing the mask apprehensively....even looking like a dark elf, a gnome is still a gnome.....

http://imgur.com/JmKm2T9.png

"What you look at dark elf?"

"Oh nothin....that is a nice shield you have....." :3

[Rygar]

Sneaksy is a god amongst neckbeards!

[Sorn]

EEEEEEE!! :D

[skarlorn]

Seeing as I was likely the first person to every encounter these creatures....it was up to me to name them.....feople seemed right.

pure gold

[Ivory]

After a successful adventure....I decided to rest a little bit before helping the ogres and trolls and dark elves with their shields.

So I headed back to the commonlands to do what I assume everyone does to celebrate.....make gnome trains!!

http://imgur.com/rhmSyZk.png

We trained all around the tunnel! It was probably the most glorious train ever!!

That was....until the dark elf who had been biding her time at the end slowly worked her way to the front....and hijacked us!!!

http://imgur.com/QMUZAg0.png

And then we all blew up.

But it was only temporary.

So I continued to look around the cave and relax....and then.... I saw it....the most fancy gnome in the world!!! Who might have actually been a clockwork! It is still a mystery.

http://imgur.com/AkL4wT4.png

Being a little jealous, I decided to do some celebration shopping!! I couldn't be as fancy as the fancy gnome....but maybe I could increase my fancyness by a few percentage points at least.

After carefully looking through the various merchants goods....I decided to spend some of my treasure on new adventuring armor from a fellow rogue. He even sold me the breastplate for a great price! And threw in gloves for free!!!

What? Don't look at me like that! It was an investment! In the long term I knew it would earn me back even more money and get me to a million platinums even faster! Also makes me more stylish, which is very important for adventuring.

http://imgur.com/N1PI0PO.png

As I was enjoying my new stylish look and celebrating by showing off my great new mask and stylish armor.....I heard more rumors.....rumors of treasure....

It seemed there was a secret ruined city with riches beyond any gnomes imagination!!! And even....legends said....a great bow!!! Though few had seen it.

As I got more information about the city....it turned out I had been there before!!! One of my first adventures!! The old city of paineel! Though when I had been there last time I'd only seen the death pit part....

Oh well, I was sure my experience would come in handy! Even if I would have to find another way down....it was time to go!!

Luckily nearby was a druid looking for people to take places (I guess that is how druids have fun).

http://imgur.com/2iokVMV.png

"Why yes, I would love a teleport mr druid! Take me to the treasure!!"

And after a short spell we were teleported to the land of Erudins! Though, upon arriving the druid was ambushed by a bloodthirsty kobold....lucky for him I was there to save him.

http://imgur.com/Vv930gj.png

I knew more would be coming soon .....if we didn't get out of there an army of kobolds would have surely come for revenge. So I waved goodbye to the druid and set off to find the city of paineel again.

http://imgur.com/fpAMBSz.png

I had heard that in order to enter the ruined part of the city, without death holes, there was a secret entrance under a pool....blocked by a boulder

The problem was it needed a key which I didn't have ....and everyone knows boulders are pretty HARD to pick. (ho ho ho ho he he he he he).

But no boulder could stand in the way of a gnome!!

Using my unique physical attributes I contorted my body into different gnome shapes. After some work and lots of wiggling I managed squeeze through a crack next to the boulder.....a perfect fit!!

http://imgur.com/LdwqqTL.png

Finally I had made it to the ruined city for real!!! I wasn't sure how I would find treasure...or how dangerous it would be....but that never stopped me before!!! It was time for adventure!!!

[Jimjam]

I wasn't sure if I could buy back in to Sneaksy after the glorious adventures of Bergnakkers...

but I did! Good to see you are still working this project!

[Rygar]

If I'm not in your Hole adventure I will cry! Looking forward to more adventures!

[gildor]

If I'm not in your Hole adventure I will cry! Looking forward to more adventures!

that's what she said

[Ivory]

If I'm not in your Hole adventure I will cry! Looking forward to more adventures!

Pshaa! I gotta catch up first! I haven't even posted about my ultimate great treasure yet!

[Ivory]

I snuck around the ruined city for a little bit, seeing the familiar monsters from before....I guess they were all over the city.

I tried to see if any of them had some pockets.....but I couldn't figure out where they would keep their treasure....

http://imgur.com/8U3QVGH.png

Eventually I jumped down into a pool room....and there I found a group of adventurers fighting! They were sitting outside of the old city gates.

http://imgur.com/inNhgkm.png

"Don't panic fellow adventurers, I'll help!"

Seamlessly I joined their adventuring....obviously impressing them with my great new armor. I could tell they felt safer with another gnome around.

http://imgur.com/807t6dV.png

The wood elf was extra fancy! But I couldn't let myself be distracted....I was on a mission....a mission for treasure....

Then I saw it....as everyone was fighting more creatures.....I saw a crown on the ground!! It was ground treasure! The best kind of treasure!!

http://imgur.com/6wLkS6B.png

I stopped fighting and snuck over to it, quickly putting it in my pockets before anyone noticed.....it was probably worth at least 40,000 platinum!

More creatures were defeated and eventually I also found a torch. It was even better than my velium rapier! Double treasure!!

http://imgur.com/JaXH1kW.png

As the night went on and we fought more, everything seemed to be going great....until suddenly things got quiet. Where were the creatures? We had fightin to do!

It seems Varzi had gone into the city to find more creatures, though that had been entire minutes ago! She was never gone this long!!

Then word spread through the group. The unthinkable had happened. Varzi.....had been captured!!

I knew what I had to do....I was the only one sneaksy enough for this mission..... I had to save Varzi!!

So I snuck into the city looking for where they were keeping her. That is when I saw it....

It turns out elemental monsters don't take prisoners!! Varzi had been murdered!!!!!! The horror!!!!!

I sneakily drug her body back to the group so we could make a grave. It was the least I could do.

But Dagmore the dwarf had other ideas. Using his dwarf magic he revived her! It was a miracle!!!

http://imgur.com/6JFkRcW.png

We celebrated for a little bit as Varzi recovered from being dead. She was so thankful for my bravery, she even rewarded me with an entire pile of gold!!

Everything seemed to be going great! We continued hunting more monsters like nothing had ever happened. That is....until I heard a vwoosh behind me coming from the group....

When I turned around something didn't seem quite right.... they were all gone!!!!! I had been abandoned!!!! All I heard was a faint echo coming from the entrance "woops, sorry gnome!".

http://imgur.com/UcFEyQ3.png

I tried to climb back out the way I came, but it was too tall for a gnome.....I was trapped....alone....

The only shred of hope I had were the rumors that there was a way out deeper in the city.... but I'd only seen these gates and the death pit!

It was my only chance though. I would have to go deeper inside. Deeper than any gnome had gone before.

[Ivory]

Well, I wasn't going to let a little thing like facing a city of monsters alone while lost stop me!! A gnomes gotta do what a gnomes gotta do!

I wasted no time and ran into the city (sneakily)!

As I walked around the streets avoiding elementals and rock golems and mice people (meople?).....I took a little time to observe their various shops, I could tell it was once a great city! Sweats, a tailors....a bank...wait a second....

http://imgur.com/SDuNMkS.png

Ok, maybe escaping could wait a little bit ...

http://imgur.com/sULLi63.png

But there was no leftover bank treasure...it seemed whoever had lived here before remembered to take their savings too....

I wandered the streets for what seemed like days!! How was I going to find this place to escape?! It could be anywhere!!!

From what I remember hearing, it was a room with 3 portals....one lead to safety, but the other two lead to the cities of dark elves and something else dangerous I couldn't remember.

As I sat thinking of what to do....I heard a voice from behind me.....

"Ha ha gnome, you are so lost!"

I looked around, but didn't see anyone there. Golems and elementals couldn't talk I didn't think.

"You lookin for me? Ha ha that is funny. You may be sneaky, but I'm even sneakier!"

"What?! Impossible! I'm maximum sneaksy!"

"Oh I know how sneaky you are gnome! Ha ha it's why I'm going to help you! A reward!"

Then he appeared....it was a halfling!! ....it was Bristlebane!!!!! No wonder I couldn't see him! He is the king of sneaksyness!!

"Finding a way out should be easy....you just have to start seeing like a thief!" He said as he threw some powder at my face.

When I opened my eyes he was gone. Maybe I was going crazy down here!

Then, slowly, as I looked around....the walls began to become translucent...I could....I could see right through them!!!!

http://imgur.com/qVmhmPr.png

I had been given the ultimate thief's vision!!! I could see everything! In the entire city!! Every hallway! Every treasure chest!! Everything!!!

But I didn't have time to go after it all....I had been here so long, I just wanted to go back home! I walked around the city some more....looking through the walls trying to see where the secret exit might be.....

Eventually I saw a room a few floors down behind some secret walls. I would have never have found it on my own!!

http://imgur.com/tzHT0Pd.png

In the room I snuck past a solitary guard....and then...I was faced with a choice....which portal would be safety...and which one certain death?!

I sat there considering my choices.....I kept having a feeling about one of the portals....

Then, right before choosing, I changed my mind and picked a different one! It was now or never! Thinking any more wouldn't help me!! I jumped in!!!

http://imgur.com/FXMkPFz.png

When I appeared, I was in a tiny cell. This was worse than a city of monsters....I WAS IN PRISON!!!! No! I'd been caught!! How could this be?!?!!

But, oddly enough, the door was unlocked.....

http://imgur.com/tTvtRLx.png

"A gnome? What are you doing down here?"

It was an erudite! And he seemed friendly enough....if even he looked at me suspiciously....

"Noffin! I'm not doin noffin!"

I ran out of the room before he tried to charge me with trespassing or something. On the way out I passed even more guards.....this had to be Erudin!

http://imgur.com/6hK8knq.png

Finally I made it into the actual city!! I was free!!!!!!!!!

The first thing I did was head straight to the bank to make sure my treasure was still accounted for. I had over 1,000 platinums now in total!!!

http://imgur.com/GZVucY7.png

Adventure success!!!

[skarlorn]

One of the greatest Sneaksy adventures to date!

[danzig]

Your sneakiness is unparalleled!

[icedwards]

the adventures of cucksy the unemployed gnome

http://i.imgur.com/kMNiVpx.gif

[Phenyo]

reaching critical levels of immersion

[Ivory]

((Oh, some people were curious....Sneaksy is a 15 gnome. Has been 15 for a while :o))

While resting in Erudin I started hearing rumors of a place that held amazing treasures. It wasn't an ordinary place though....only those who had an ancient artifact could enter!! Seein as gnomes don't get treasure by sitting around, I knew what I had to do....adventure!!

Apparently I could find out more about this place in Kunark....in a jungle they called the Trakanon's Teeth. Seemed like a strange name for a jungle, but treasure is treasure.

http://imgur.com/Tl1VkhC.png

It didn't take me long to follow some maps and ride a couple druids to the jungle. They even knew rumors about the secret dungeon....apparently it was actually a dragons lair!! The best place for treasure!!!

And better, they had some clues how to get in. They said I needed an ancient artifact from an old iksar....but to get that, I needed two amulets from the feople that lived in the jungle.

I wasn't quite sure how I was going to get it from them....but, well, I would figure that out as I went.

When I got to the jungle though, I noticed a couple other adventurers. One was a dwarf who seemed pretty familiar....

"Dagmore?! Is that you?! From the hole!! You abandoned me!!"

"Oh....sorry about that Sneaksy....these things happen"

"I'll forgive you....if you help me find a couple amulets!"

http://imgur.com/oOiXS4x.png

It was a perfect opportunity!!! I would use a gnomes strongest weapon....emotional manipulation mixed with guilt!!!

They agreed and we were soon hunting many feople in the jungle!!!

http://imgur.com/jkio9Pw.png

After I had found the amulets we said our goodbyes and I continued forward. Apparently there was an iksar that wanted these amulets in exchange for the ancient artifact....it seemed like a pretty good deal to me, I just had to find him first.

Searching the jungle I soon stumbled upon the perfect place an iksar would be hiding....iksar temples!

http://imgur.com/Bqu12ax.png

Sure enough inside the temple was the iksar....but also he was a ghost!!

Oh well, a deal was a deal...I don't discriminate.....he got his amulets and I got my ancient artifact!

http://imgur.com/U2D25Aa.png

Now I had everything I needed to find the great treasures in the fabled dungeon of Sebilis!!

Back out into the jungle I went , searching for the entrance to the dungeon. I had heard it was in a ruins. Then again, everything was ruins...so that could be pretty much anywhere.

http://imgur.com/x4Ta5pz.png

As I searched around I realized I wasn't the only one after the legendary treasures though....

Listening in on them they talked about an underground passage....

http://imgur.com/2bTpYbb.png

Just what I needed!

Eventually I discovered the passage! After searching for almost forever.

http://imgur.com/SE6kCRk.png

This had to be it!! I wasn't sure what I would find inside....I'd never been this far before in search of treasure.....but I couldn't stop now! It was time to see what all these rumors were about!!

http://imgur.com/KdYqaNS.png

[Ivory]

It was time to get to exploring....

I was surprised to find that the dragons lair wasn't a lair at all....it was actually a city!!! An ancient feople city!!!

http://imgur.com/Pl2WP1e.png

I spent so long exploring....avoiding the feople as they patrolled the hallways....

http://imgur.com/V1EEXdt.png

Eventually....I discovered their dark secrets though.....they were harvesting brains!!!!!!!

http://imgur.com/42p1khh.png

When I stumbled upon their jail cells....I felt sorry for the iksar they had trapped.....they would surely take his brain....

But then I realized according to gnome science, iksars brains are no where as big as the one I saw. Did you know iksars brains are actually more walnut sized?

http://imgur.com/v01Cmki.png

As I explored more....eventually I stumbled upon a troll sleeping on the ground.

http://imgur.com/cMMZdY0.png

For some reason I guess the feople thought he was dead? But I could tell right away, nope, he was just pretending.

"Hay troll, you need help?"

"Oh...gnome....I'm trapped"

"You seem to be in a pickle! Wants me to help? I GOTTA PLAN!!"

"Yes please"

I knew what I had to do.....

I poked the troll in the side with my dagger so he got up! The feople, realizing he wasn't really dead, all rushed to attack him!! It was over quickly....

http://imgur.com/4xcAvVp.png

You see, I couldn't carry a live troll all by myself!! Gnome science has shown dead bodies are over 90 percent lighter than living ones!!

I snuck his body away from the feople and up through the dungeon. I had seen other adventurers somewhere in here... I was sure someone could fix dead-itus!

Sure enough I found a cleric with good enough magic and the troll was back! He was saved!! All thanks to gnomes!!

While at the entrance with other adventurers, I figured this was my chance to join a party of fellows and go into the dungeon deeper. I still didn't know my way around ....so this would be good for everyone.

http://imgur.com/ax4We8i.png

One person, an iksar named Arget was forming a group.....but for some reason he disbanded me even after inviting me!!! After forming up they ran off deeper into the dungeon....

Oh well, I guess I could keep exploring alone. I continued down a few minutes later.....and.....well, this is what happens when you don't have a gnome in your party.

http://imgur.com/BWqop23.png

[Ivory]

I had already been in Sebilis for a while....and gotten to know the feople halls fairly ok.

But I still hadn't found ancient treasure!!!

Still, those rumors of a dragon....maybe that was where I needed to go, where the dragon slept. Everyone knows dragons have the best treasure, if I could find him I would be richer than even king akanon!

Problem was I wasn't sure how to do that....

Until I eventually ran across another rogue sneaksin around the hallways.

"Hay, you! I see you!!! Do you know where the dragon is?"

"What? Why do you want to go there?"

"You have to ask?! Treasure!!"

And with that, we descended deeper into the dungeon together.....further than any gnome had gone before....

http://imgur.com/RP6EPTK.png

Along the way I also discovered a perfect swimming practicing pool!!

I would come to know this pool well....spending many a day swimming in it behind the backs of the feople.

http://imgur.com/2CTioLI.png

Eventually we found the true lair of the dragon!!! And everywhere we great golems!! But....no dragon.

Thanking the rogue he left to do whatever he was doing....leaving me there, in the lair.....

And with that, I had found my new home. I would wait for the dragon to appear, and take his treasure before he realized what had happened! It was a foolproof plan!

http://imgur.com/2HHdwsd.png

I got to know the golems well. The big one? His name is Biggy G (g for golem). We became pretty good friends.....

http://imgur.com/P5qf5af.png

As long as he didn't see me.....

For days I slept in the room waiting for the dragon to come. No one ever came down this far into the lair....

I would entertain myself by sneaking (the most fun activity, of course).

Until one day....a skeleton appeared!!!

http://imgur.com/xTpRV5q.png

He seemed pretty friendly. We talked about all sorts of things.

Eventually I told him why I was there, looking for the dragons treasure. He didn't seem to care too much about the dragon , or treasure, I guess he just didn't have the stomach for that kinda stuff (ho ho ha ha ho).

"Looking for treasure? You see that froglok over there?"

"The what? You mean the feople? Yea I see him."

"He happens to keep some of the most powerful treasure...gifted to him by the great dragon himself!"

"A feople does?!? Thank you for telling me skeleton!!"

http://imgur.com/AkZCLqW.png

From then on....all I could do was think about the feople surrounded by his golem army.....

I wondered what kind of treasure he had....the most powerful treasure.....

I had to find out what it was!!

"Feople! What kind of treasure do you have?!"

"Who said that?!"

http://imgur.com/qeuF8y1.png

"You don't need to know the details! What is your great treasure?!"

"You'll never know! I am the great Tolapumj! It's mine!!"

"I see.... then we do this the hard way....."

Bum bum bummmmm.

[MiRo2]

I though the first "feople" was a typo, until I realized it was gnomish thieves cant for froglok.

These are the best!

[Ivory]

I had to think of how I would defeat the feople! I could tell he was strong....perhaps even stronger than Biggy G! Or even the dragon! Wherever he was!

Taking more of my daily swims, I thought hard about what I would do....

http://imgur.com/XsULPyL.png

If I knew how to make poisons....I would poison him! ....but I didn't....so....couldn't....

Maybe I could trip Biggy G to fall onto him?! Smashing him in one shot?!

No no, then my treasure would get smooshed too.....

It looked like I was gonna need help....but this was where few dared to go....

More days passed. I tried everything I could think of. Even using my gnomish communications device to send for help....but there was no one strong enough to do the job....

That is, until one day when I was doing my sneak laps I saw a grouping of adventurers overlooking the lair!!!

http://imgur.com/oc3HSUI.png

Fellow adventurers!!! Lead by the mighty Airborn!

After a little convincing I got them to agree to battle the feople with me.

Though, we knew we wouldn't be allowed to fight the feople alone.....especially with Biggy G around.

http://imgur.com/MOc0emQ.png

I tried to talk Biggy G out of fighting us....but he couldn't be reasoned with! Also, he didn't know who I was.

I guess this is how one sided relationships go. One side gets to secretly know the other side without reciprocation....and then ends up murdering them.

Anyhow! Once the golems were disposed of....it was time to battle the great Tolapumj!!!

http://imgur.com/IK8Xq4N.png

"You?! You are still here? After my treasure?!"

"No time fer talkin! Imma stabbin you!!"

The battle raged on for ages!! Tolapumj was indeed the strongest creature in the entire lair! Using his great magic to control our minds and turn us against each other!!

But...even with all of that...we ....we were winning!!

As I was about to land the killing blow, he turned and grinned at me as he touched his head....POOF he vanished!

Then....one by one...as if in a horror movie....the team began to vanish too....

"Protect Lakos! He can bring us back!!"

I had already begun to slip away....only seconds away from sure safety....when I realized there were only a couple people still alive.....

I knew....I knew what I had to do.

I stood up and shouted out!

"Tolapumj!! I'm right here!! It's me you want!!!"

Moments later I was teleported before him.

"Indeed it is!" he growled ....I stood no chance against the full force of his mighty blow....I was defeated!

But I had bought Lakos the dwarf valuable time!! And he managed to escape!!!

Soon Lakos did his work and we were all revived. My sacrifice was worth it!!

But we had a problem. We were only barely getting to Tolapumj before a new patrol of golems arrived....we needed a little more power!

Luckily I had heard of another adventuring party not too far away. Further than most could go....but a sneak master could still reach us.

I sent word to them we were looking for help.

http://imgur.com/gTqVt1y.png

Eventually Kayyte Hayyte the great showed up! A sneak master like myself!

We were almost ready to try to battle Tolapumj again. It would be our last attempt. No matter what happened, we had to stop him from doing whatever he had done before! But we knew what to look out for now....

Then, as we were preparing our final assault....a single golem appeared from the shadows and rushed straight at me! The others on the team had already gone ahead. I had to think fast....knowing that if it caught me, I would be doomed.....so , doing what any gnome would do in such a situation....I ran!! Using advanced gnome running techniques, of course.

The others soon realized I was in great danger and came to my aid....defeating the assassin. It was close....too close....

Finally, it was time to face Tolapumj again!

http://imgur.com/HWI7jHV.png

"You failed once already! You will fail again!" he said as he charged at us.

But Kayyte was pretty good with her daggers, and Tolapumj found himself overwhelmed.

Then...he began to reach for his head again...

"Not this time!!!" Airborn shouted, as we all rushed push him off balance.

Moments later....we had done it.....the great Tolapumj was defeated....

http://imgur.com/SbcOFbt.png

"Now....what were you guarding so carefully?"....

As I searched the body...I slowly came to the realization that he had no treasure at all!!! No gems! No weapons!! Nothing but a dirty old cloth hat!

"I guess you can have the hat gnome, it is worthless".

The others turned and began packing up. All of this....for a cloth hat....

http://imgur.com/DVrIm25.png

I don't know....but I had a feeling there was something we were missing....

[Dreenk317]

keep up the adventures! Its great fun to read about them.

[Kaight]

Eventually Kayyte Hayyte the great showed up! A sneak master like myself!

Oh Sneaksy, you flatter me. You are a better rogue than I'll ever be! /kneel Thank you for including me in your adventures!

[Nitsude]

Oh Sneaksy, you flatter me. You are a better rogue than I'll ever be! /kneel Thank you for including me in your adventures!

This would have made a good stream.

[skarlorn]

Congratulations, Sneaksy! I have always considered my dream goal on Borgnach to infiltrate Sebilis and join a group prior to level 40. I'm glad to see this goal attained by another hero.

[skarlorn]

kill yourself as soon as possible

hope this holiday season finds your self-loathing stockings stuffed with compassion and love

[SoekiWiz]

hope this holiday season finds your self-loathing stockings stuffed with compassion and love

The stockings loathe themselves?! Sentient stockings, ultra-rare drop from WL armors?!?!

PS I'm making a "Sneaksy visited my group and all I got was my watch stolen" t-shirt because she refuses to famous me for my spider & doggie mass murdering.

[Ivory]

PS I'm making a "Sneaksy visited my group and all I got was my watch stolen" t-shirt because she refuses to famous me for my spider & doggie mass murdering.

Pshaa, it has to be adventure!

[Ivory]

I was sittin around in Thurgadin mindin my own business when a fancy pants dark elf came in.

http://imgur.com/T676BkI.png

This dark elf looked pretty rich!!! Maybe even too rich! It is a common known fact that people who are too rich find themselves unable to move so well because of all the treasure they keep....it is a great burden!!

I knew I had to help him!!

So, I did what any kind hearted gnome would do....I reached in his pockets sneakily and tried to help!

"So you think you can steal from me gnome?" he said....turning to me and wiggling his fingers.

http://imgur.com/4pBnfat.png

Suddenly I shrank!!! I was gnome squared!!

This wasn't just a rich dark elf....it was a MAGIC rich dark elf!!!!

"Well, I think you have bigger problems now" he laughed

http://imgur.com/kX5smnW.png

Then, just as suddenly as I had shrunk....I wasn't in Thurgadin anymore...but an inn in the commons!!

Little did the dark elf know that I knew the cure for all sorts of things....sleep!!

http://imgur.com/eJnnnvm.png

But after my nap I was still tiny.....

It looked like this was more serious then I thought...not even a nap could fix it....

If not that, then maybe the tunnel! There had to be an adventurer who knew how to fix this!!

http://imgur.com/J5qCh9k.png

It took days of walking through the commonlands until I saw the familiar place in the distance....

http://imgur.com/dUaXuf7.png

But I was too small!! Most adventurers there didn't even notice me!

Even this iksar....just stared right past me...

http://imgur.com/b7HjEUT.png

As I walked around more looking for help, I saw ....something I'll never forget.....

http://imgur.com/4ps3WI8.png

The horror!! A dead gnome just laying around?!

It seemed the tunnel wasn't going to solve my problems. And, plus, it was obviously too dangerous for gnomes!!

But I had another backup plan....I would go find a druid....I had to get back to Thurgadin and find the magic elf.

http://imgur.com/3mzGf56.png

[Kaight]

Teensy Sneaksy

http://i.imgur.com/Qye6ddf.jpg

[Ivory]

The druids agreed to help me....and eventually, after many more days of walking through the great divide from the teleporting rings, I made it back to Thurgadin.

http://imgur.com/6nd4JSY.png

But no matter where I searched, I couldn't find the magic dark elf!!!

As I sat in despair....I heard the sound of tiny footsteps behind me.

It was a skeleton!!!!

http://imgur.com/71kvGqg.png

"Is this an ambush?! YOU WANA FITE ME?!"

"What? No! I saw you looking for the dark elf....I thought I was the only one, the only one he had shrunken...."

"He did this to you too?!"

"Many years ago.....when I was....still alive...."

"Oh, sorry you are a skeleton now. Don't feel bad, I'm part skeleton too you know!"

".....anyhow, I think I've discovered at long last how to reverse this curse. We need some of the dwarven ale! If it can grow hair on a dwarves face, surely it can grow us too!"

"Yea, that makes sense. You are a smart skeleton!"

And with that....we both headed to the nearest bar!

http://imgur.com/dYBqsmr.png

"I'll have your finest dwarf ale please!"

"That'll be 2 gold pieces"

I pulled out my moneys (from my secret money purse, of course)....but the dwarf refused to take it! Apparently all my treasure had been shrunk along with me....my gold coins were nothing but gold dust now!

http://imgur.com/xM2Ws1Y.png

"We...were so close....what will we do now?"

"STAND BACK MR SKELETON! I GOTS AN IDEA!"

My money might have been shrunk....but maybe we could earn the ale! With entertainment!

I rummaged around in my pack and grabbed a few things I always keep on me....then tinkered it together as fast as I could.

"Time for....tiny fireworks!!!"

http://imgur.com/4BGjTmq.png

As I had done at the halflings city before, I put on the best show in thurgadin!! Fireworks everywhere!

The dwarves were so impressed they gave us a stein of ale.

http://imgur.com/FZSfeTF.png

"You did it Sneaksy! Now we can be whole again!!"

"No! WE did it mr skeleton!!"

We climbed up on the brim of the ale....ready to take a drink and surely break this curse...

http://imgur.com/xWydhBd.png

But....as the skeleton went to drink.....it only dribbled out over his ribcage. It seems no matter how much he wanted to drink it, he just didn't have the stomach for it!!

"Sneaksy....you must drink without me.....it is....too late for me...."

"No!!! I can't leave you mr skeleton!!! We have to do this together!"

"It is impossible for me....go, become big again....live your gnome life, find treasure....for us both!"

http://imgur.com/IBe1nos.png

"I'll never forget you mr skeleton!" I said, looking down into the stein of ale....

"And I you Sneaksy!"

With that, I drank the ale and grew back to my normal size. When I turned around though, I couldn't see the skeleton any longer .... for he was too small.

The tiny skeleton still walks the halls of Thurgadin, forever cursed. Some say they have seen him! Though only for a moment as he is too tiny to keep track of.

I'll find a cure for him one day though!! One day!!!

[Sorn]

Sirken, you fiend!

[Herpa Derp]

Cheers Sneaksy! Here's to the adventures we've shared fighting tree monsters in the name of A Shady Swashbuckler!

[vorpal_raddish]

Love it. Love everything about it~

[fugazi]

I encountered this Gnomish lowlife trying to steal the silverware from Velketor's dinnertables! The horror!

[Ivory]

I was sittin around in commons like I tend to do when lookin for adventure....when, I ran into another magic dark elf!

He musta been a friend of the other one, because, out of the blue...he shrank me too!

http://imgur.com/aQvqMeZ.png

But, thankfully, it didn't seem he was as powerful, and I was quite a bit bigger than I was before.

I knew this day might come again....but this time I had a plan! Quickly I ran around and gathered old hammers to build a gnome fort for protection. It was foolproof!

http://imgur.com/E1Uvgpa.png

There I drank some extra dwarf ale I had and regained my size. The same trick won't work on a gnome twice!!!

But....in the meantime....it seemed the world had a bigger problem.....the dark elf had cursed one of the adventurers and turned him into a tiny treant!!

http://imgur.com/VJwuNuM.png

Not only that! But this treant was under the dark elves control! And began to rampage with his great power!!!

http://imgur.com/m0aNNp6.png

Herpa the iksar tried to fight him.....but was defeated after a long and hard fought battle...even my gnome science medicine wasn't enough to keep him alive. Others too tried to battle....but no one could stop this great treant and its songs of doom.

Luckily I had connections with the elves and sent word to them that the world was in great danger! One of their own had been cursed! And needed to be stopped!

We distracted the treant for a while.....and then, when everything looked most grim.... Rosen the archer appeared! Ready to do battle!!

http://imgur.com/MInkKNo.png

Her arrows were so mighty! The treant and everyone around was shocked by the power of archery!!

But the dark elf saw her power and stepped in...banishing her to another part of the world!

It looked like all hope was lost.

Then....Borusk the mighty stepped forward and said he would battle the tree! No one had much confidence in him...but it was all we had left....

I mean, besides me of course. I woulda killed that tree already, except I had something in my eye -rubs eye-

Borusk and the tree stared at each other for only a moment, and then ran at each other!!

Borusk gave him a few pokes with his daggers, and it seemed to do pretty ok. Though he would need a lot more than that against such thick bark.

Suddenly he sprang forward and slipped behind the treant!!! Followed by the greatest stab I've ever seen!!!! The treant instantly fell!!! It was over!!! So fast!!!!!

After that the dark elf admitted defeat and Dabbles was returned to his normal elfy form. That night the world knew him as Dabbles the Tree but, sadly, it wasn't to last.

http://imgur.com/ZVuS4fR.png

Having won the battle, it was time for celebrating! So we all snuck around the tunnels for a little bit! The best way to celebrate!

http://imgur.com/AePx2kc.png

Soon everyone had moved on to various adventures....but I was still left ....sneakins around.

"Psst, gnome, you are Sneaksy aren't you? I've heard of you..."

It was another dark elf! At least this one didn't shrink me ....yet....

"Midnight...come alone." she whispered, then walked off into the crowd.

http://imgur.com/bzKeteR.png

Humm, seemed suspicious....but I didn't have a choice! I had to find out what she wanted!!

So I waited....doing my usual gnome stuffs helpin merchants find things they lost. I even picked up a new fancy runed oak bow!!!

...................

...................

Midnight eventually came....and I continued to wait, looking for the dark elf I had seen before. Though, they all look alike to me.

The merchants were packing up their shops and the caves began to empty. 1 am....2am....3am....I was starting to think the dark elf was trickins me!!

Then a shady lookin old human came walking into the caves. He kept his head down, but I could tell something was strange with him....he wasn't an adventurer, that's for sure. No, he was a brigand!!

He continued walking till he had come up right next to me....still, not even looking up....

"I've been keeping it sharp all these years" he said as he handed me a small object wrapped in rags.

I looked down confused...but before I could ask any questions he walked away again into the night....

Carefully I unwrapped what he had given me....and inside was a dagger?

http://imgur.com/qWqWKHX.png

It looked like a pretty fancy dagger! Probably worth lots of platinums!!! But somehow I felt there was more to this.....I wonder where it came from.....

[Ivory]

Mayong Mistmoore is the biggest mystery of the entire world!! This greatest adventure!!

[Herpa Derp]

I got beat up by a tree, and now there's witnesses!

[Thiefboy777]

Best thread ever.

[Jimjam]

A Fanged Skull Suppository?!

[Ivory]

As I asked around to find out more about the dagger, I was surprised by the reactions! Some people were scared when I showed them....others amazed a small gnome like me had it.....but most people knew what it was, even if they had never seen it before....

It was the dagger of the king of the vampires! Mayong Mistmoore!

They say he is really old....and really strong....and Imma gonna guess, really rich!!!!!

That was enough for me! I had to find him! Besides the minor detail that no one had seen him for years....but treasure is treasure!!!

Of course, what better way to find a person than to visit their home? His castle was near where I grew up, I guess it was a good place to start!

http://imgur.com/KeJLWpw.png

When I arrived at his castle, the first thing I noticed was his gates had these eye-bat tapestries all over....probably his symbol? Do vampires have symbols?

Oh well, I was gonna find him soon enough.....just had to get past his guards. Seemed vampires weren't big fans of company, but nothing a little sneaking couldn't handle.

When I got inside I noticed the symbol had another version. Little eye bat creatures. Hmm hmm....

http://imgur.com/6yK6kOM.png

After a bit more sneaking around the castle I finally found him!!! .....well, sorta....

He definitely looked rich. Were his clothes gold?!

http://imgur.com/tpWBEJE.png

I continued to look around....searching the rooms one by one....trying to listen in on the dark elves that littered his palace for clues......

But....it seemed no one knew noffin. Which is normally how I like it! But not when I'm lookin fer information!!

http://imgur.com/K94NnSW.png

Eventually I had searched most of the castle....but he just wasn't around...

As I began to sneak down the hall to leave I suddenly felt a small draft coming from next to me.

Looking around I noticed a gap in the stones. A passage??

http://imgur.com/wHvSQ0r.png

Didn't take me long to figure out how to open it, and inside I found a hallway that looked like it hadn't been touched in years. Cobwebs, ripped tapestries....maybe this was where they kept their secret treasure vaults?!

When I got to the end of the hall I saw a treasure chest!!

http://imgur.com/e8kfmyt.png

But ...upon closer inspection....I realized it was no treasure chest at all!!! It was a coffin!! This had to be where he slept!! Though, I could tell he hadn't been around for a long time.

((((Also, about the rumors that mayong would come kill people at the zone randomly....his room is a few inches on the other side of the entrance wall hehe))))

There was nothing else there for me.....so on my way out I decided to check one more place to see if I could maybe find some clues where he had gone....

That is when I found this....

http://imgur.com/oneqLpj.png

Hummm, I wasn't quite sure what this was....but it seemed important!! At the center was even an unusually powerful dark elf!

All these clues....all this readins.....it looked like I was gettin in over my head with tracking down this vampire. Luckily, I had heard of an adventurer who I heard knew the most about the secrets of the world.....shockingly, a barbarian!!

So, after I left, I sent out words to my spies to keep on the lookout for the barbarian....

It didn't take them too long to get back to me. He had been spotted in Greater Faydark! This was too much of a coincidence....was he after my vampire treasure also?!

http://imgur.com/VK00tRw.png

"You after my treasure?! I'm onto you!!!"

"What? Me? No, just researching mysteries."

"Oh yea, uhm, me too....mysteries...."

I told him what I had found in the castle....and he seemed to know all about it. I decided I could trust him...for now....it was time to discuss this somewhere safer.

As a sign of trust he even showed me the adventurers secret of the water staffs!

http://imgur.com/UNkG0rM.png

Then we got to talkin....apparently the sign on the ground was part of something he called the Chelsith stone!!!! A phenomenon he happened to be currently investigating!!!

Kraddok said he wasn't quite sure what the markings were.... but said he had seen them all around Norrath. I guess, now that I thought about it, I had seen it before too....just never paid too much attention.

We ended up talking a lot. Him thinking this Chelsith stone markings was the key to something big....but me, I think the symbol of Mayong Mistmoore is the key!!

If only I could find more of Mayongs symbols...maybe I could follow them and find out where the vampire king went.....and, more importantly, find his treasure!!!!

[utenan]

yay! I was in an adventure ( although briefly)

don't trust kraddok, sneaksy - he's after your fortune!
hey! I resent that - The only treasure I seek is knowledge!

Hangin with Sneaksy was fun - we talked mysteries, treasure,... uhh.. sneaking?! Then we had an Adventurer's Magical Crystal Water Staff Party with an unsuspecting dwarf on the Felwithe bridge : )

[Ivory]

I still gotta catch up with adventures.....but this one is pretty topical with the entire alliance of the raider guilds lately....

................

I was sittin around bein a gnome when my spies reported in that there was a gathering of adventurers getting ready to attack the giants city of Kael.

Obviously, I had to go!

Using my disguises I blended in as just another adventurer.... helping to fight giants outside in the wakening lands until the rest of the forces assembled....

http://imgur.com/DdolbcE.png

Eventually everyone went inside and began preparations for their attack on the greatest treasure holder in all of Kael....the sacred statue of Rallos Zek!!

The thing is, I also heard they had come to an agreement beforehand of who owned the statue....so no adventure race was held....

Little did they know I knew the laws of adventuring!! That the statue belongs to whoever hits it first and it announces their name to everyone!!!

This was my chance!! My chance to pull the greatest heist in all of gnome history!!!!!!!!

So, while all the others were getting ready to fight....I carefully snuck down to where the statue was waiting....and took out my biggest gnome marker!!

http://imgur.com/f6SSiU1.png

Then, I scrawled my name across the statue in PERMANENT INK!

"Is Sneaksys! All Treasure Mine!!"

I had done it! I had claimed the statue before anyone else!!!! According to article 6 paragraph 3 of the raiders agreements, I now had complete ownership of the most prized treasure in all of Kael!!!

It was time for plan B....to sell the rights to the others!! I was gonna be rich!! Maybe even hundreds of platinums!!!!!

But...as I tried to begin negotiations.....they ignored me and attacked the statue on their own without proper ownership papers!!!!

http://imgur.com/ZN6UaIK.png

It was a travesty!! No one steals from a sneak gnome!!!!

I would show them! I would show them all!!!!! Little did they know I gots connections!!

http://imgur.com/lIsBw3n.png

"Who dare summon me?!"

"Oh oh over here! Me! Sneaksy the gnome!!"

"A gnome dare summon the Avatar of War?!"

"Kinda! I just came to tell you those thieves broke OUR statue!!! We gotta rough dem up a bit! For the ransom and things!"

"I see....I'll handle this then..."

And so "plan rough-em-up" was set into motion.....

http://imgur.com/sJq0bw9.png

I followed the Avatar as he made his way through Kael.....their monks were so shocked they fainted in the hallways!!

Eventually he came upon the band of thieves.....so I watched....watched from the shadows.....

http://imgur.com/X4z6V6v.png

The battle was so mighty it shook the entire city!! Time even seemed to warp as so much magic and stabbing was happening, it was like the world couldn't handle it!!

But....in the end.....the Avatar had succeeded....the entire party had been extremely roughed up.

http://imgur.com/he3R02G.png

As I sat overlooking the destruction I figured they learnt their lesson. No one steals from a gnome!!!

[Phantasm]

Once again Sneaksy manages to kill multiple groups while making off with duh lewts. The injustice!

[Nixtar]

This is why those of us who do not play(much) stick around the forums.

You're a sparkly gem of awesome, Ivory.

[Sorn]

Look who we found sneaksing around Velks!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TMVkskAlAcQ

(spoiler: nothing exciting happens)

[Ivory]

Look who we found sneaksing around Velks!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TMVkskAlAcQ

(spoiler: nothing exciting happens)

Right before that I had just gone on a mission to save someone from lower dogs! And got out alive! Which was why I was singing dramatic music.

Bum bum bum ba ba ba (dramatic music).

This is why those of us who do not play(much) stick around the forums.

You're a sparkly gem of awesome, Ivory.

Thanks!! :D

Once again Sneaksy manages to kill multiple groups while making off with duh lewts. The injustice!

You can't prove noffin!!!

[Dreenk317]

You can't prove noffin!!!



As I sat overlooking the destruction I figured they learnt their lesson. No one steals from a gnome!!!

But I wholeheartedly approve

[Sorn]

Right before that I had just gone on a mission to save someone from lower dogs! And got out alive! Which was why I was singing dramatic music.

Bum bum bum ba ba ba (dramatic music).

I need to send out my own little rogue to follow you on your adventures and stream them :P

[Rygar]

I laughed so hard at this amazing satire of the raid scene... that image of you in front of the statue and screaming, "It's All Mine!!!!!!!" just has my sides splitting.

[Ivory]

((Still level 15 when this happened, I'm 16 now! -flex- I level so fast!))

It was a quiet day.... my spies hadn't reported anything happening for a while....and I was getting restless.

But I was an adventure gnome! I couldn't always try to sneak around where others were....it was time to stand on my own gnome feet and get treasure on my own!! Luckily I had just the treasure in mind to go after.....the legendary Glaive of Marltek from the wood elves of Firiona Vie!

So I set out and after a long journey found myself on the shores overlooking the familiar outpost!

http://imgur.com/atF6fC6.png

I spent some time in the outpost making preparations for my adventure. I would need arrows, food, bandages....the works!

You see, the captains brother was missing....and they feared the drolvarg army had taken him. The captain was offering his legendary sword to anyone who could find information about this....if they could make it back alive.

While there I also met some other gnome explorers....who, when they heard I was going against the armies of the drolvarg, begged me to stay! It was too dangerous they said!

But I couldn't let danger stand in my way!

http://imgur.com/F9WNPbV.png

On my way out I noticed a giant catapult...but they wouldn't let me borrow it....

It's ok, it woulda just slowed me down anyhow.

http://imgur.com/yE32lfv.png

And so, when night fell....I set out into the forest alone..... not sure if I would be coming back....

I snuck most of the night to reach drolvarg territory. At first only seeing one or two walking through the forest....

Deeper and deeper I went....until eventually I realized I was surrounded by them!! Everywhere!! I was in the heart of the drolvarg army!!!

http://imgur.com/pJM5dWw.png

I took my time to explore more, looking for clues of what happened to the captains brother.

Eventually I found an army camp of drolvarg and overheard one of them talking about having found an elf in the woods.

This one! Definitely! I needed to find out what he had!!

http://imgur.com/z0MdWU9.png

But I was too deep inside of drolvarg territory to try and pick his pockets. No matter where I snuck he was guarded.....

It was time for plan B....I would have to fight them.....sure, it was one gnome versus an army of drolvarg, but gnomes is strong!!!!

So I found a position on a nearby hill and waited for a patrol of drolvarg to pass....my heart was beating so fast....

When it was semi safe I carefully took aim and let loose my arrow!!! It wizzed through the air and....missed.

"Was than an arrow?"

"On that hill!!! A gnome!!! Rip her to shreds!!!"

They were onto me!!!

Not just the scavenger...but the entire camp....and patrols nearby were noticing too!!!

I needed to get out!! I couldn't find them here in their own camp!!

So I ran out into the forest with what seemed like the entire drolvarg army behind me! At least 10 of them!!!

As I ran through the forest I had to carefully dodge feople and spider people and even pirates!! Somehow managing to get past them without them noticing me or the drolvarg army chasing me.

http://imgur.com/2QcLtNP.png

Eventually I came to a cliff.....it looked like it was the end of the line....this is where the battle would have to happen.....

I didn't quite have a plan, but I had to come up with one fast. Facing a drolvarg army wasn't exactly what I was hoping for....I tried to shoot a few arrows into them as I ran, but I needed something better.

Then I noticed a drixie and pilgrims here and there near the cliff side.....I had an idea!!!

I lured the drolvargs near the pilgrims and the two of them began fighting! Not all of them, but a few.....

I did that a few more times until the drolvarg army had spread out and were battling in pockets around the cliffs. But I still had my eye on the scavenger I had heard talking in the camp, I needed to see what he had!!

Then I saw him fighting a few of the pilgrims alone....and he was losing.

http://imgur.com/MmNez6b.png

If the pilgrims killed him they would surely take the evidence to the captain themselves!! I had to stop them!!!

So I lured more of the army that was chasing me into the pilgrims where the scavenger was!!

They all battled and the scavenger was saved....barely.

From there it was time for me to get to work! With my trusty runed oak bow I began shooting as many arrows as I could into the pack chasing me! The scavenger my primary target!!

Slowly I worked him down until finally he began to run. The others seeing this panicked and ran off over the hill ((really, this happened....a mass of them chasing me just randomly ran off for a minute when he got low.....they came back eventually, but was so strange!)).

It gave me time to finish off the scavenger and on his body I found a note.....this had to be the evidence the captain needed!!!

The war between the dolvarg and pilgrims was still waging, but I had what I needed and I ran back to the outpost as fast as I could!

I ran straight to the captains cabin and woke him up.

"I gots the evidence!! Of your brother!!!"

It turned out his brother he had gone crazy....and ran off into the forest ....surely eaten by dolvargs.

But the captain was so thankful he handed me the legendary Glaive of Marltek!

BUT! As I admired the sword we were interrupted!!!

The dolvarg had seen me escaping the battle and sent a group of assassins after me!!!!! They had even infiltrated deep into the outpost without alerting the guards!!!!

For a moment....I accepted my death.....there was no way I could escape, their first blows against me caught me by surprise.....I was too hurt....and there were no guards nearby....

But my gnome survival instincts kicked in!! I couldn't let it end like this!!!! My feet began movin on their own and I ran outta the captains cabin as fast as I could manage!!!

"Gnome in trouble!!! Imma bein murdered!!!"

http://imgur.com/H8Pwouu.png

I was sure one more hit and I would be dead.....I didn't even bother to look behind me until I had run all the way through the outpost and over the bridge past several patrols of guards....

Somehow though....I had survived the assassination attempt!!! The drolvarg failed to keep the note from the captain! And I, I had the legendary sword!!

http://imgur.com/SYhruHp.png

As the sun rose over Firiona Vie we stood victorious.... the people of the outpost would always remember it as the night a lone gnome went against the drolvarg army.....and won.


((Sorry for lack of better pictures, I was busy trying to survive :P))

[Dreenk317]

And sneaksy gets another +1. Keep em coming!

[Ivory]

She'd been gone a long time.....longer than usual....

I dunnos why I worries about her, Sneaksy is pretty goods at stayin out of trouble....but she always came back to Ak'anon between adventures.

Something was differents this time, I could feels it.

http://imgur.com/Q95yz28.png

"Have you seens Sneaksy around lately Mr Dreeb?"

"Humm, she was here a couple weeks ago. Something about investigating vampires in the old Mistmoore castle. She knows gnomes shouldn't go there! But ...she never listens....as usual."

"She wents to the castle?! What if....she gots kidnapped?! or murdered?!?! OR TURNED INTO AN OGRE!!!"

"She has been gone a long time....I don't think there is anything to worry about th..."

"SO MUCH TO WORRY ABOUT!! IMMA GOIN TO FIND HER!!"

Before Watchman Dreeb could respond, a voice came from behind me. "Not without me you aren't!"

It was my good friend Bibil! He was pretty smart....I always thought he would be a good tinkerer, but he was instead trainin to be a warrior. A pretty good one too! He could almost kill a wolf all by himself!

"You sures? Is might be dangerous..."

"That's why I gotta go! We can split up the dangerous between us!! Thereby decreasing its danger ratio by 50%!! It's just science you know."

I couldn't argue with logic like that!! And so, we set off to the castle of Mistmoore... to find Sneaksy and make sure she was ok.

Luckily gettin there was the easy part! It is common knowledge most forest things like gnomes!

http://imgur.com/V2mJcoP.png

Once we got to the castle, Bibil and I split up to see if any of the adventurers had seen her.

We checked the courtyard....and the graveyard....and the other graveyard with bodies outside of the ground....

http://imgur.com/zDp50US.png

But she was nowhere to be found outside of the castle. So we met up again at the gates.

Then one of the adventurers, a dwarf named Kleric, asked if we were lookins for Sneaksy.

How did he know?! He musta seen her lately! He said he wasn't too sure....but we figured she musta gone inside already.

http://imgur.com/YxeVHEx.png

The castle was a lot more empty than I imagined. It was dangerous, but if Sneaksy could sneak around....so could we!

"Something doesn't seem right here Prixie..."

Bibil was nervous, but we couldn't turn back now.

Then, as we turned a corner, all of a sudden a dark elf and vampire and their protectors came rushing through the doors at us!!

http://imgur.com/sqoFDwZ.png

"BIBIL!! ITSA TRAP!! GETS OUTTA HERE!!!"

But instead of running he rushed ahead to face the attackers!

I was amazed! He was swingin his sword so fast!! I would go get help!!

But the vampire saw me tryin to get away and grabbed onto my arm.

"Lets go of me! I'm tryin to escape!"

The last thing I remember was seein Bibil get clawed by the gargoyls and fall to the ground before the vampire sunk her teeth deep into my neck.....then I passed out.

......

When I came to we were outside of the castle in the Faydark....but no one else was around....did we gets saved? Whew that was a close one!!!

I looked around for Bibil and that is when I saw it....his....his corpse, laying there next to me!!

This was an emergency!! I had to gets him back home!! If we could revives him within three hours, he could be saved!!!! I knew the rules! It's the rules!!

I was still pretty hurt from all of the biting though.....and carrying a gnome body is pretty hard work....but a gnomes gotta do what a gnomes gotta do!

A couple hours passed and eventually we made it to Steamfont mountains. I was so tired now, I wasn't sure I could go on.

As I sat to catch my breath, I noticed a rat walk by. It looked....it looked so ...good.... -drools-

I dunno what came over me, but instinctively I jumped up and bit the rat!! It sounds strange, but apparently rat blood sure gives a gnome a lot of energy!!

http://imgur.com/e3S0hK8.png

Refreshed a little bit, I continued to drag Bibils body towards the city. Then I realized we were still at least 30 minutes away and his three hours were almost up..... I....I wouldn't make it in time....

http://imgur.com/AVhiHjo.png

That's when I got an idea...I had been watching the clerics of Akanon for years. I'd seen them cast spells...and even practiced a little bit on my own, even if I wasn't really allowed to.

I'd also seen them cast their revive spell a few times....

They said never try to cast revive unless you were a trained cleric...but...this was an emergency!! Bibil had to be saved!!!!! It was our only chance!!

I bent down next to his limp body and pressed my hands against his chest. Channeling all of my gnome magic I closed my eyes and concentrated as hard as I could!!

And......nothing happened.....

"BIBIL!! NOO!!! PLEASE WAKE UP!!!"

I couldn't do it!! I wasn't a strong enough gnome!!!!

Suddenly a kobold sprung out from behind a tree and lunged at me! Attracted by my shouts!

Not just a runt though, no, it was a full fledged kobold SCOUT! One of the most deadly kinds!!!

There was no way I could face it.....so I ran! Stumbling over myself as it chased after me.

Steam vents were flaring up all around us, but nothing could stop the kobold from his pursuit. Eventually it had me cornered.....if I wasn't cooked to death, I was gonna be eaten. I braced myself for the inevitable....

"YOU LEAVES PRIXIE ALONES!"

From nowhere Bibil came charging out of the steamy haze towards the Kobold!

But....he....he didn't look so good.....his skin....was sagging....and bits of him were falling off.....

"Bi...Bibil?!"

As he fought the kobold ripped even more of his flesh away....but somehow, he kept going, trading claws for punches and kicks. Not only that, but giggling the entire time!!!

http://imgur.com/ipUxXG1.png

After a great fight Bibil had defeated the kobold! But....by now all of his flesh had fallen away....he.....he was.....a skeleton?!?!

"Yous okay Prixie? he he he"

"ME?! You are a skeletons!!! Look at yourself!!!"

"He he he, oh? Oh! He he he"

"Is not funny! We gotta gets you looked at!!"

After that we continued back towards Ak'anon in silence....

When we got to the city things didn't get any better. Everyone was starting to look at us angrily.....some even threatening to attack us if we got any closer!!!

We didn't dare try to get all the way to the clerics guild....we had to get outta there!

And so we stayed in the mountains, fighting rats and kobolds to stay alive.....

I'd been changed by what happened in the castle, somehow I'd gottens powers....I could take the life from things, almost like....like a vampire!! And Bibil, without flesh he couldn't feel any pain....and seemed to find a lot more things funny.....

I don't know how long passed... it musta been a while....but at least we were safe-ish.....

Until one day a druid found us.....

"You're Prixie aren't you? Sneaksys sister? I've been looking for you."

He handed me a small wooden box and a note.

http://imgur.com/qvQ9Jmn.png

[Lobus]

mind blown...

[ZiggyTheMuss]

A++

[vorpal_raddish]

That was a sad one!

[Landael]

lol sounds like a certain failed gnome "cleric" I know and her bony companion!;)

[Ivory]

lol sounds like a certain failed gnome "cleric" I know and her bony companion!;)

Totally different!!! ....Prixie is a vrampire -,.,-

[Ivory]

((Still so many adventures to catch up on!! ...but since I'm always 16 now, I can juggle the order a little :3 Dis one goes to top! Because so good!!!)

I'd been learnins so much about vrampires lately....but if I ever ran into Mayong Mistmoore...I was gonna need to be prepared.

One day I ran into a gnomey while investigatins stuffs. Her name was Ninik, and she seemeds like a pretty smart gnomes....with goggles and everythin!!

http://imgur.com/0paNbNW.png

Anyhow, we gots to talkin....and eventually began chattins about how paladins is so strong to fight vrampires.

There is a prophecy of the gnomes you hear about now and then... that one day there will be mighty gnome paladins! Lotsa people say it is crazy, but I believed it! And Ninik believed in it too!

Casually Ninik said "What if....we build one?"

As we talked more, it turned out Ninik was a legendary master tinkerer!!

Was it possible?! To BUILD a gnomish paladin?!?

She said she had been workins on special armors that acted just like magic, but instead of magic, it was science!! Faster runnins, faster hittins, so strong, so dexterity.....with something like that as a start, maybe, maybe it was possible!!

But, it turned out she needed all sorts of pieces to begin prototyping her theories.

Stuff like holgresh wings for the cooling flapinators and stuff like that.

Luckily I was a sneak gnome!! And sneak gnomes is good at gettins stuffs!

It was official! We was gonna work together and fulfill the great gnome prophecy!! The world would see a gnome paladin....a clockwork one!

So, I headed to the wakening lands! To find what we needed!!

That is when I met Wrekka, the lizard king! Not sure why someone would want to be king of lizards...but ok.

http://imgur.com/Je3gczx.png

Anyhow, he was intrigued by our plans to create a gnomish paladin....and offered his assistance, even givins me so fancy items to make huntin easier!

With his help I set out into the forest...it was time to collect pieces.

Along the way a sifaye messenger ambushed us!! Well, not "us"...more him....since he was an iksar and sifayes hate them.

Luckily Wrekka was pretty strong and fought off the sifaye easily. But as it ran away, I saw a tiny dagger drop from its satchel.

http://imgur.com/bMlFazR.png

I picked it up and looked at it....it seemed like a pretty neat dagger! Perfect for gnomes too!!

So I went to place it in my belt for throwin....when all of a sudden the dagger began to glow and I was overcome with unspeakable images!!!!

When I finally snapped out of it, many minutes had gone by!!! Wrekka even said I had vanished completely from the world!!!

What....what was this weapon?!? It musta been what the messenger was trying to deliver!!!! I'd never seen such a powerful weapon before!!!

I handed it to Wrekka to try. Maybe it was just a gnome thing?

But when he went to put it in his belt.....suddenly he too was overcome by unspeakable images!!! And POOF he was gone!!!

Then, just like me, he returned a few minute laters....shaken by his experience...

We had found...by accident....maybe the strongest dagger in the entire world....I knew I had to keep it safe!!

Or....maybe there was something else I could do with it -grins-

Then I had an idea. That magic dark elf that had cursed me before!!! He thoughts he was so strong! It was time to beat him at his own game!!! With my legendary dagger, not even his powers would be enough to fight it!!!!!

Humm, I wasn't too sure how to reach him though. I'd only seens him that one time. But maybe if I prayed hard enough he would hear me.

http://imgur.com/AXqKzt3.png

So I shouted as loud as I could!! Did he hear me? He musta....right?

And so the challenge was issued!!!

The rest of the day went by and still no magic elf though. Eventually I forgots about it and went back to huntin for tinkering pieces.

Then, the next day, as I was tracking down pieces.....I felt sneakin happenin behind me....

http://imgur.com/ILLaLDk.png

It was the magic dark elf!! He had founds me!!!!

"Does this means you accepts my challenge magic dark elf?!"

"I do gnome. Let's see what you have."

He took my legendary weapon and I grinned. No one in the world was strong enough to resist its curse!!!! I was going to win this challenge! And finally puts that dark elf in his place!

Slowly he put the dagger into his belt ...and.....HIS SWORD VANISHED!

I don't....even know how that happened! But I didn't have time to contemplate it! He was wielding the cursed dagger!!!!! And not being overcome by its power!!!

"What did you do to my sword gnome?!"

"I don'ts know! It wasn't sposed to do that!"

"Well I've won your challenge gnome! And you've caused me the trouble of finding my sword in the other dimension! ......let this be your lesson!"

He pointed at me as he grinned with flames surrounding him....then, suddenly, he was gone!

When I looked down....my feet looked strange....I felt strange....

http://imgur.com/AmBbSZO.png

HOW COULD THIS BE?! He had turned me into a troll!! A big ugly troll!! With an itchy butt!!!!!!!

No no no no! Trolls is worse things in world!! Even worse than ogres!!!!!

I had to get this fixed! Fixed right away!!!!

But...who? Who could fix this?!

Then I thought of the dragon city nearby. Surely they had powers to fix me! They were dragons afterall!!! And we were pretty good friends!!!

So I ran as quick as I could to skyshrine and straight to the dragons in the library!

"Fix me fix me fix me! Imma sposed to be a gnome!!!"

"Oh my, Sneaksy? Is that you?"

"It is me! Make me back into a gnome!"

"Yes, we can do this for you....but, not as you are. We must remove your soul for a short time while we fix whatever has caused this".

"WHAT?! My soul?! But I needs my shoes for sneakins!!"

"No...no....don't worry about it. Follow me and we will begin right away."

Then they lead me into another room and put me to sleep. When I woke up I still felt pretty strange....

http://imgur.com/T94BKqJ.png

"Gnome? Are you awake?" A soft voice said in my head.

"Who says that?! Is someones outsneakins me?!"

"It is I, Rolandal, the one whose body you are sharing for the time being".

I looked down and saw my big dragon hands.....

"IMSA DRAGON!!!!!!!"

"Well, not quite. I'm the dragon, your gnome body is being restored by the others. But it will be a day or two till it is ready."

Apparently dragons is good at movins souls around to places...

[Erati]

A+

[Ivory]

"Psst...dragon...is you still awakes?"

Rolandal had been keeping us in Skyshrine all day. No flying around, no dragon breath, no noffin! And while he was awake, I couldn't control our dragon body much. Though, he did let me play with the tail some!

But finally it seemed like he had fallen asleep....and now....and now Sneaksy was drivins this ship!!!

So, obviously, the first thing I did was sneak out of Skyshrine and into the Wakening Lands! Even in a dragon body I still could sneak pretty ok!

When I got out to the forest...I figured the first thing I would do is visit Wuoshi! He was never so talkative to me before, but as a dragon I was sure he would be much more talky!! Also, I mighta heard he has so good treasure!!! Surely he would loans to fellow dragon!!

http://imgur.com/WVtSiQG.png

But, once I reached where he usually hangs out....he was nowhere to be found!!

Oh well...I guess it was a good chance to practice my dragon breath now that I was alone.

http://imgur.com/DaXSpid.png

Then I got an idea....

With Wuoshi gone, someone was gonna have to fill in for his dragon duties!!!

And that someone, was gonna be Sneaksy! The great sneak dragon!

So I got into position and crouched down....waiting for adventurers to appear.

http://imgur.com/sz8kj9O.png

Eventually I heard the air cracking....and suddenly two adventurers materialized!! An ogre and an elf!!! This was my chance!! My first dragon duty!!

I began biting at the air and roaring!

The elf, seeing my great performance, was so scared!! He began casting his gate right away and moments later had vanished!!

The ogre though, unable to get away, panicked and tried to push himself as far back into the teleports box as he could! Then he quickly tried to invisible himself and ran for it!!!

As I began laughins, the ogre turned around and slowly came back....

http://imgur.com/F9dcnvx.png

"Dids I scare you ogre?! Ho ho he he he"

"You! ....is....that Sneaksy? The gnome?"

"No no! Imma Sneaksy the great sneak dragon!!!"

I didn't feel like eatin adventurers, even though that is a dragon thing to do I guess. So instead I showed off my dragon breath some and my great wings.

After that first encounter....I finally understood why Wuoshi stands there so much....it is so so fun to scare people!!!

So I kept doins it! I stood over the ring scaring everyone who came in!! Person after person! Hoping maybe they would drop some treasure in their panic, but none did.

Eventually I got tired of fillins in for Wuoshi though....and decided it was time to do other dragon things.

Like....uhm....these wings!

http://imgur.com/cES8fkm.png

I'd never really seens dragons flyin around so much....but they had these big beautiful wings! It was time to see how good they worked!

I stretched them out as wide as I could and jumped into the air! Beating my wings down for extra lift!

I soared up! Straight above the treetops even!!! I was doins it! Dragon flying!!!

http://imgur.com/IlfGcU8.png

I flew over top of the forest for a while like that, sometimes perching on top of a tree for a rest.

Eventually though I saw some construction happening by the giants....I wanted to get a closer look....so I came down and landed on their towers overseeing the valley.

http://imgur.com/2kl76Hf.png

As I looked around I spotted a pretty big opening in the wall. Then, my dragon instincts began to kick in....it looked....so comfortable....I had to make it my lair!!

I flew down into the valley and as I got closer I saw a group of adventurers fighting outside of my soon-to-be lair. I marched up through them confidently!

"Makes way! This is my lair now! And you...you are my minions! You serve the great sneak dragon!"

I tolds them that us dragons also need tributes! Or else we start to get hungry!! Gems...rings...I was gettins rich!!!!

http://imgur.com/65DijIY.png

As I nestled in back into the opening, my new minions began work clearing the giants from my lair.

And there I stayed....helping to fight against the giants as I collected more and more treasure. Now and thens an adventurer would refuse to pays me tribute...but after some dragon breath or steppins on them a little, they gave in.

http://imgur.com/EjCqqoM.png

It had been many hours though. Eventually, getting tired, I retreated to the back of my lair and curled up for a nap. Being a dragon is pretty hard work!

As I drifted off to sleep I heard Rolandal again.

"It seems you have had a busy day, but it's time to go home."

[Dreenk317]

Frickin Sneaksy the Dragon!!!

That is some awesome sauce sneaksy. Well done!

[necro316]

fun read

[Erati]

Cant believe Sneaksy became a dragon...

the adventures a gnome can do,wow.

[raski]

Thanks for including me in your epic saga sneaksy. Look me up if you ever need assistance whilst adventuring and progressing the Gnomish sciences......<Lizardking>

[NiNiK]

Oh mine's goodness! Sneaksy a DRAGON!!!!!!!! Soso much 'citin' adventures!

[necro316]

id comment in here but sirken would prob ban me

[Ivory]

After findin Mayong Mistmoores room abandoned in his castle....I had been set on findin out more about him, and figuring out where he went!

Luckily while in Skyshrine I had run into a gnome named Sylphi. She had been sent to study with the dragons, apparently because of her unique connection with wind magic....even if she was only 12.

http://imgur.com/iHOai4s.png

But she spent a lot of time in the dragon libraries, so was able to help me find some books on Mistmoore.

Apparently he is old....over 10,500 years old!!! Not even a dark elf as I had thought, but instead maybe an Elddar elf...or even a y'dal!! An ancient ancestor of all the elves.

Legend says when the y'dal were first created, they were sheltered in an ancient city known as Mistmyr. Maybe that was where his name "Mistmoore" came from?

Anyhow, knowin some extra history was good....but it wasn't getting me any closer to finding out where he went. I would have to follow his tracks....

I had heard a rumor that he escaped the entire continent of Faydwer... though the ocean of tears?

So I left the dragons city and headed back to Faydwer...then set sail for the ocean to see what I could find.

http://imgur.com/NzqwRNG.png

It was a long boat ride to reach the islands of the ocean of tears. Then, after getting to the port, I "found" a smaller ship to begin exploring....Imma sure no one would miss it!

http://imgur.com/LiNeVdG.png

I went from island to island investigating....trying to find clues of Mayong Mistmoore having come here....

Cyclopses, towers, dwarves....each island was coming up empty....

That is...until eventually I found myself on a dead island out in the middle of the sea...

http://imgur.com/vCIedqB.png

The island was crawlin with Mayong Mistmoores gargoyle guardians who were fighting skeletons that wandered the island....with spectres watching over everything at the center! And scattered everywhere were these stone graves....

Mayong Mistmoore had definitely been here! It was proof he had escaped Faydwer and gone to Antonica!

I had a hunch where the next clues would be....he was an elf right? He would have surely gone to Neriak to rest after his journey! Good thing I had just the disguise...

http://imgur.com/FiMkUU3.png

Neriak was a pretty strange place...and I began to systematically search every house...every room....for any clue that Mayong Mistmoore had come there.

http://imgur.com/qh0qZAd.png

I discovered the dark elves used the symbol I had seen at the center of the glowing symbol in his castle also...I guess this was their symbol?

http://imgur.com/Aew7qAx.png

Eventually I had searched almost every area of Neriak....every building....the houses of the royalty....the warriors and casters guilds....

And other than some strange symbols of unrelated issues, I hadn't found anything linking Mayong Mistmoore to the city.

But, before I left, I still had one place to check. So I could at least said I checked it all.

http://imgur.com/fpdSHT1.png

When I got to the last place, it was like a castle within the city. Its own walls and guards, secluded from the rest of Neriak.

It was the necromancers and shadow knights guild. I guess it made sense they were anti-social.

That was when it happened....as I opened the door to begin lookins for clues, I saw it! The walls were COVERED in Mayong Mistmoores symbold!! The eye with wings!!!

It was a sanctuary to the vampire king!!

http://imgur.com/KbLqQR8.png

This was the biggest discovery to ever happen!! The dark elves shadowknights and necromancers were working for Mayong!

Then it struck me....how far Mayong Mistmoores reach must go....after 10,500 years, how he must have been alive as these cities were founded....and how rich he must be because of it!!!

I was hot on his tracks! He might be a vampire, but no one can hides from a sneak gnome forever!!

[stormlord]

What happened when you clicked this thread
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XEFc-k9hjg4

[Ivory]

((((Note!! If anyone has extra globs of tar from goo's ....let me know! We needs lots!!!))

I was getting closer to findin Mayong Mistmoore....but I knew if I was ever gonnas have a chance against him, I was going to need more help and more power. My sister Prixie was still out there somewhere, but even with her help....we would need more.

Luckily I still had Niniks and my plan to fulfill the great gnomish prophecy and create the legendary gnomish paladin with tinkering!! If we could finish that, it would be a so strong weapon against a vrampire! Everyone knows they is weak against paladins!!

So, it was back to hunting for the rarest parts used in such an amazin machine!! It was back to the weird weird world of velious!

http://imgur.com/10GhzHr.png

Wait...maybe not that weird!! I meant just wakening lands!!! I not stickins around for whatever that was!

http://imgur.com/urz80Gy.png

Anyhow! When I got there, first step was gettin some living granite for the granite chiperator! Is a very important part Ninik tells me! Only way for it to last is to be livin, then it can regrow!

Problem is rock monsters don't have pockets...so I wasn't going to have a chance of "findin" one like that.

Luckily when I got to the caves I met an ogre! When you need somethin killed, ogres are your best bet!!

http://imgur.com/PsbaRvj.png

"We" fought many of the geonids looking a couple good pieces of granite. Sure the ogre did some of it....but I watched to make sure we didn't get ambushed by giants!! Probably the most important job!!!

The ogre was pretty brave though! At the end, the geonids caught onto us and sent an army to stop us!! But the ogre was able to defeat them all!!! And, amongst the rubble, I found what I needed....success!!

http://imgur.com/Mnx40cF.png

Next I had to find some tar, for stickins stuff together. Sticky stuff is very important in tinkerin!!

Even more lucky is I found a couple globs from a giant halfling just sittin around in the caves!

http://imgur.com/kAtg7cA.png

But I still had quite a list left....and next I needed to find some sifaye dust. For the goggle-dusters, of course. Not many people know this, but if you mix sifaye dust into glass, it makes so so fancy see invisible goggles!

The problem is, no one fights sifayes! Which is understandable, they is pretty pretty.

It was time for sneaky gnome hands to go to work! I went everywhere in the forest....finding all the sifayes I could and rummaging in their pockets. But, even after finding piles of wings and other parts....I hadn't found any dust!!

But, eventually I got word from great tinkerer Ninik that she had an old helmet we could use with Sifaye glass already made!!!

http://imgur.com/AxPfNqd.png

Next up I needed some holgresh wings for a flapperator (for keepins things cooled down) and some fur for a static-rub-atron (an amazin source of power).

"Why not just use bat wings or something" you may be thinking....but OBVIOUSLY that doesn't have the right flapinating ratio! Ha ha ha, a bat wing? You want it to blow up?!!

http://imgur.com/OQWZwFb.png

This was a pretty dangerous job though....I knew where the holgreshes lived....but...it would be one of the most dangerous sneak jobs ever...

Slowly I crawled through the caves to their livin area....and one by one I began pickins their pockets. You can't stay hiding while picking a pocket by the way!! It is maximum dangerous!!!

But, even after picking the pockets of all but a couple....and a bunch of ones walkin around outside....I wasn't able to find any fur OR wings!!!

It was time to bring in the big weapons!!

The next day I met another adventurer willin to teach the holgresh a lesson...and together we killed the entire cave! A couple times!!

Most of the wings weren't good enough, but eventually we found a couple pairs!! And fur!!! And I even found some so so fancy beads from their king!

http://imgur.com/xnnt0Lc.png

Now I had most the parts great tinkerer Ninik needed....just....needed to find a faun hoof next.

http://imgur.com/ejdHvdC.png

I'd heard they are dangerous....perhaps the most dangerous thing in the entire wakening lands, except for dragons!!!

While I tried to figure out how to get their hoofs, I sent the pieces I had collected to Ninik to begin workin. There was no time to lose!

[Jexey]

Sneaksy for president!

[Lhancelot]

I can't view the pictures, says they no longer available? :confused:

[Jimjam]

I can't view the pictures, says they no longer available? :confused:

Mayong runs imgur! He's onto you Sneaksy!

[skarlorn]

I legitimately believe that Sneaksy is the most powerful level 16 gnome rogue who has ever walked the world. Her gear is incredible.

[Phantasm]

100p for every head of Sneaksy delivered to Grand Master Glox in Cabilis. The Halls of Pain are getting the remodel it so desperately deserves

[Lorglath84]

Sneaksy - you must have stolen those images because someone stole them back!

[Lhancelot]

Sneaksy - you must have stolen those images because someone stole them back!

Someone put out an APB for Ivory, he needs to fix the images of Sneaksy and her adventures. :(

[RDawg816]

has anyone ever actually read this?

Quite a few of us have.

[Expediency]

congratulations skeaksy

tens of everquest addicts have read your story

Almost 20k clicks on this thread and a 5 star rating.

You'll get banned soon with your obvious trolling. Try to improve your insults a little bit so you go out on a high note.

[RDawg816]

You'll get banned soon with your obvious trolling. Try to improve your insults a little bit so you go out on a high note.
What do you expect from a Red Player... :p

[zahlia]

The game we all share is called Everquest, and it isn't only because of the [tasks] to be completed for various NPCs within the game world. Different quests motivate different people. The quest to see every zone, the quest to experience each encounter, the quest to max every tradeskill, the quest to get that one item that eluded you all those years ago on live, the quest to buy low and sell high, the quest to solo a mob that most say cannot be taken down without a group; it's EVERquest, after all, and chances are if you're reading these forums, at least one of them has captured your imagination at one point or another.

For some players, the quest that yields the most satisfaction is the quest to make the game even more enjoyable for those who play it. Congratulations, Sneaksy, on your unparalleled success on this particular quest! As one of the "tens of everquest addicts" who has read your story and encountered you in-game, I genuinely wanted to thank you for your contributions to this community. I hadn't logged in more frequently than once a month for ages before a chance encounter with Sneaksy in game reignited my desire to spend time in Norrath once again. There's another quest! The one to make a retired player return to the game! In this case your [reward] was some clockwork armor, and of course some milk and cookies. You also have my respect and my gratitude. Please keep the stories coming!

[Lhancelot]

Granted I didn't realize how much of the charm was from the screenshots, they definitely added to the story and prose!

*hint* fix it Ivory! Make the Sneaksy thread great again! Need images! :p

[fadetree]

you guys are just bullying me now

If you're going to troll, at least be interesting. Your kung-fu is weak. Yes, it's still annoying, so you've at least got that going for you, but it's not much.

[Jimjam]

congratulations skeaksy

tens of everquest addicts have read your story

You better watch it BROTHER, before the tens

AND TENS!

of Sneaksymaniacs run wild on you!

[nectarprime]

has anyone ever actually read this?

goddamn fuck off you idiot. Get a fucking job and out of the basement

[Dreenk317]

your language is not appropriate for server chat

reported

enjoy your ban sir

Trolling server chat with posts crafted specifically to insight anger in others is also not allowed. Just so you know.

[nectarprime]

your language is not appropriate for server chat

reported

enjoy your ban sir

None of your posts are appropriate for server chat because you are a shitty troll. Hopefully they ban your eqemu account too lmao

This thread is awesome and just because you are mentally disabled enough to not understand the enjoyment of imagination doesn't mean that others are the same.

Not one single person is impressed with anything you post, and everyone is just laughing at how dumb you are.

Also Chroma just visited your profile so get ready to get banned again lol

[Jimjam]

Plot twist: Aftreqwasntcool is Ivory.

[Lhancelot]

Plot twist: Aftreqwasntcool is Ivory.

lol that would be hilarious.

[Bummey]

Trolling server chat with posts crafted specifically to insight anger in others is also not allowed. Just so you know.

If that were true 90% of the board's population would have been banned years ago.

[necro316]

I like how everyone loves Sneaksy, but hates Shnickasaurus. They are the same type of EQ player. Both found their niche in game and play their own way. There is no right way to play the game and everyone should be allowed to make their own fun.

So why do people spew venom and hate at Schnickasaurus, but love Sneaksy ?

[Lhancelot]

I like how everyone loves Sneaksy, but hates Shnickasaurus. They are the same type of EQ player. Both found their niche in game and play their own way. There is no right way to play the game and everyone should be allowed to make their own fun.

So why do people spew venom and hate at Schnickasaurus, but love Sneaksy ?

Because Sneaksy is a gnome. Everyone loves gnomes.

[Pokesan]

sneaksy good, grocer bad

[nectarprime]

I like how everyone loves Sneaksy, but hates Shnickasaurus. They are the same type of EQ player. Both found their niche in game and play their own way. There is no right way to play the game and everyone should be allowed to make their own fun.

So why do people spew venom and hate at Schnickasaurus, but love Sneaksy ?

One is a lighthearted roleplayer, the other is a mentally ill conspiracy theorist.

[ZiggyTheMuss]

I like how everyone loves Sneaksy, but hates Shnickasaurus. They are the same type of EQ player. Both found their niche in game and play their own way. There is no right way to play the game and everyone should be allowed to make their own fun.

So why do people spew venom and hate at Schnickasaurus, but love Sneaksy ?

Well just going out on a limb here but one of them makes entertaining picture stories and the other is a filthy EC reseller.

[ZiggyTheMuss]

both are mentally ill drug addicts actually

I will not believe such things of Sneaksy unless I have proof!

[Jimjam]

I will not believe such things of Sneaksy unless I have proof!

I'm afraid no player is eligible to create a gnome unless they have a certifiable mental illness and chronic drug problem. It's just the rules.

[AgentEpilot]

I'm afraid no player is eligible to create a gnome unless they have a certifiable mental illness and chronic drug problem. It's just the rules.

Can confirm, have a gnome and paranoia issues and a fondness for amphetamines. Had to mail GM's proof before they let me leave Ak'Anon