Making time to play?

[Troy]

Originally Posted by Sorn [You must be logged in to view images. Log in or Register.]

I always wonder why there are so many posts around here that treat girlfriends/wives so dismissively or refer to them like they're just obstacles. It makes me sad. I hope when I find someone to be with, we'll actually like each other and want to spend time together. Then again, I guess that would be a real relationship and not a side hobby for when there's downtime in P99. :P

In the context of "making time to play" relationships ARE obstacles.

I logged in for the first time in a long time this week because it's impossible to make time to really play if you also have other hobbies. EQ requires the same dedication as a part time job (or a full time job for many players).

The only real solution is to play a solo class at a safe camp that no one else wants, so you can log in at will and do something useful without impacting anyone else. I've been trying that with a mage, though it turns out that they nerfed the hell out of mages since I last played so you probably want a wizard/warrior or something. Melee/nuke mob to death, sit down and hide, go back to doing something else while regenerating.

[Tenlaar]

Originally Posted by Sorn [You must be logged in to view images. Log in or Register.]

I always wonder why there are so many posts around here that treat girlfriends/wives so dismissively or refer to them like they're just obstacles. It makes me sad.

Yeah, no. If you can't play EQ for a few hours here and there during the week because your significant other doesn't like it (AKA doesn't allow it), your significant other sucks and is a bad person to be in a relationship with.

[Tann]

Originally Posted by Tenlaar [You must be logged in to view images. Log in or Register.]

Yeah, no. If you can't play EQ for a few hours here and there during the week because your significant other doesn't like it (AKA doesn't allow it), your significant other sucks and is a bad person to be in a relationship with.

Yeah, no. Ignoring wife/gf/kids for pixels a few hours a week if they're not OK with it doesn't a good person make.

[Mycota648]

Originally Posted by Troxx [You must be logged in to view images. Log in or Register.]

Talk about f'd up priorities ...

girlfriend/wife/kids/life/travel/family .... all of these things most of the humans on this planet would agree are more important than internet gaming. Don't get me wrong, it's important to have time for your hobbies ... but with an attitude like that he might find himself without anyone to share his life with. I've been 'that guy' in the past, and it almost killed my marriage.

To answer the OP's question (at least my opinion):

-work to find a job more accommodating to what you want in life that is within your scope of possibilities
-have an honest talk with your girlfriend about how much you would like to play and ask for her thoughts on what about your playing bothers her so much. If you're working as many hours as you say you are, I'd bet the real reason it bothers her is that you don't have much time away from work to begin with - and you're wanting to choose a video game over her (at least that's the way it is/was for my wife).

At some point you'll have to make choices based on what's important to you. If getting a chance to spend time on your hobby is really important, you might have to give up hours ($$) or a specific job opportunity ... or give up the girlfriend. I bet if you really sit down and talk with your girlfriend you may find yourself with a bit more time on your hands to play, but with the number of hours you're working a week ... that's still not going to leave much time in your schedule unless you flat out ignore her for the most part.


PS: Depending on the type of job you have, playing video games at work is an excellent way to not only get fired but also ruin future employment opportunities. If you work by appointments or are just hanging out on standby to take care of work as it comes up ... it might be possible. If you have a cool boss and the situation is right, it's possible. If you're working an hourly job where there's more or less always something productive you should or could be doing ... hell I'd not only fire an employee working for me who I caught playing video games when I was paying him/her to work ... but I'd also let future employers know when they inevitably called me to check on that persons work history.

I have played everquest from work before, but only in down time. If I'm on call and there's nobody/nothing to take care of, might kill a mob or 3. Grouping, raiding, or anything with any type of a time commitment isn't really possible. Something like the 6-minute bard diet to get a quick kill while afk 99% of the time is ideal - just a way to move the xp bar. Otherwise it's work when I'm at work, and not-work when I'm elsewhere.

Troxx thanks for your post! It sounds like you have been in a similar situation as me. I do care for my girlfriend more than a game. I really do think my job is burning me out with the long hours and no time to myself.

I could bring a laptop here and play during down time (probably a few hours a day) except in the lab I get no phone reception, so no teather, and cannot use the companies network. Putting the game on a flash drive is a option i had not thought of. WIll this bypass needing admin rights? I would not get in trouble for playing but I wouldnt be able to group or anything because clients come in at random times and then I have to run the samples they bring. So i dont know if that would be worth it.

I have been looking into getting a new job however i live in a small town with little to offer and cant move for another year while i wait for my girlfriend to graduate college too.

I dont know lol..... I just wanted to hear some ideas or methods you guys have employed to get in a little more play time without disrupting RL responsibilities and relationships.

Thanks everyone! [You must be logged in to view images. Log in or Register.]

[Hinthek]

Im one of those IT guys you speak of...

Work from home. Work on one laptop, game on the other. Its good for soloing but any grouping is out, that is if youre honestly working at the same time.

Past that, i can fire it up at night after the kids go to bed, and play while the mrs and i watch tv. Its a minor faction hit, so you gotta balance it out. Any reasonable gal should be ok with ya gaming every now and again. Its much better than going out boozing it up with the fellas(in their eyes anyways, heh).

[Troy]

It is also sometimes "easier" to be unavailable for hours at a time if you actually leave the house rather than sit at your computer at home. When I was playing more I would occasionally just take my laptop to a coffee shop or something for a few hours and play that way with no interruptions. Drop by the grocery store on your way home and call her to see if she needs anything there or do some other errand that needs done.

[Mycota648]

Originally Posted by Tenlaar [You must be logged in to view images. Log in or Register.]

Yeah, no. If you can't play EQ for a few hours here and there during the week because your significant other doesn't like it (AKA doesn't allow it), your significant other sucks and is a bad person to be in a relationship with.

My girlfriend isnt a bad person. She just gets upset when I play video games because I literally zone everything else out. She will talk to me and I wont even hear her. So essentially she feels like I am ignoring her, and in reality I am.

I think a major issue is that I work way more than her. She gets a few hours on each side of my shifts to herself. When I leave in the morning she is there and when I get home at night she is there. Not that this upsets me, i love being around her. I just dont think she realizes how much a hour or two to yourself can really help you have fun, destress, etc... She probably has never thought that I never get that. I will probably have a talk with her about this.

[Fame]

Tell your girlfriend you have been living a lie to impress her.

[Itap]

I work a rotating schedule, 24 on 48 off. Obviously I find plenty of time to EQ, as well as other things. Try using your degree to get you a hospital job, they usually work 3 12 hour shifts a week

[Itap]

Sometimes I float to a station where this one guy brings his laptop and plays WoW :gross