MY WEED GOT POISONED

Black Jesus · #1 11-17-2012, 02:45 AM

Long story short: people have been trying to FUCK with me in odd ways ever since I truly accepted The Secret as my true reality, and instantly the whole world made perfect sense to me. Now, I decided to say fuxk you to my adhd meds. I need mental clarity to begin my work on a perfect AI to eliminate human waste and hate in general.

Now, have you seen the movie The Terminator? Okay, cool. So, I had a strange urge to buy a glass one hitter on Tuesday, which btw, is not something I usually do. I buy a small bag from friend a. And smoke it. Fels fine, I get high. Friend b. Gets off, I go over there to try it out and bullshit etc. I get there and a strange car is parked outside with a duct tape and paint bumper sticker resembling a butterfly
Cute, I think. Not like The Butterfly Project has been harassing me, that would be FUCKING paranoid of me to even think..

So I go inside w no worries, and ask for 20. He is like "are you sure?" wtf. I had been using his piece, buying 5 worth and smoking it all while we talked. Naw, man. Just give me 10, rolling my eyes. I show him my new one hitter, he ignores me and he goes into this anti blacks ramble. Wtf. I toke my one hitter.
my right eye instantly dims. Wtf. My heart rate sky rockets. Wtf. I dont feel high
. Felt like I just huffed some god damn anthrax. I run to his bathroom to check myself. My eye is all jacked up, and at this point fear is taking over me. Not in a usual way, I was in a good mood fyi.

"Dude wtf my eye hurts." he laughs, starts sayin Oh Yeah. Mine did too, worst pain ive ever had. It goes away, youll feel like ur dying.

Wtf. Wtf. I get my laptop and tell him g2g. He says "dude, leave your weed here incase you get arrested." wtf????? im like. Nope. And I bounce out, calm my mind using deep breathing
. Look up the symptoms. Pesticide or herbicide, or worst: cleaning solution. Very deadly
If you smoke as much as I normally do, Id be dead. You know, my other friend died while he was this dudes room mate. He proudly told me that he never got autopsied. Who the FUCK says that?

a murderer. Thats who.

Bamzal Sherbet · #2 11-17-2012, 02:47 AM

tl:dr

searched for weed only saw it once

Black Jesus · #3 11-17-2012, 02:50 AM

I type on my phone so this looks like shit. Thanks to my psychic powers I was able to evade death. I should narc him out but Id rather let his guilt and innate fear ruin him instead. Also the last girl I dated was secretly Jewish and really liked skeletons, death and decayq

She also used bleach wipes on her entire body, left a dead butterfly corpse in my car. Is it my fault I look like HARRISONS grandson? FUCK, man. haters all ver da place